The Hermit and The Hunk
by Pandora's Box Is Heavy
Summary: Bella's life hasn't always been easy. The circumstances of her past have resulted in her living a half-life hidden away behind locked doors. When her new, green-eyed neighbor moves in, will she be able to open her door, and her heart, wide enough to give them a chance at something wonderful?
1. The Hermit 1

**I don't own anything but the plot.**

**This story is over two years in the making. I started, stopped, chickened out and second-guessed myself constantly. Hell, even when the urge to write it came back, I was still apprehensive. _Am I doing this subject justice? _**

**I'm only going to say this once: A lot of Bella's issues are my issues. Mental illness is not a joke or something to take lightly. It also isn't textbook. Everyone that suffers does so in their own way. There isn't a magical cure for the darkness.**

**I want to give huge thanks to my TH&TH team.**

**BitterHarpy, Hitchy and aushapasha: thank you for the words of encouragement and patient handholding**

**Alice's White Rabbit: I'll say it a million and ten times if I have to. Bless the betas!**

**1**

**The Hermit**

"Alice, there's someone outside," Bella whisper-yells into her phone.

"_Maybe it's just someone dropping off a package."_

"No. I'm not expecting anything."

"_Okay ... your neighboring townhouse has been up for rent for months. Maybe someone is finally moving in. Hopefully, they aren't like that one tenant who boiled cabbage every other day. Why are you whispering, by the way?"_

Bella checks the peephole in her front door, but it's still blocked. She sighs in frustration. Her skin begins to crawl with anxiety, and her hands subconsciously rub together.

The edge of her thumbnail digs painfully into her skin until a blister starts to form.

It's a habit she's been trying hard to break.

Falling off the wagon is all part of recovery, or so they say.

"Because they blocked my door, and I'm freaking out. I can't breathe. I'm going to throw up."

"_Bella, you share a stoop. They're probably just trying to get everything inside quickly. It looks like it's going to rain today. Stop freaking out, take a pill, and go run yourself a bath."_

Bella doesn't tell her that she'd already taken one before she parked herself at her front door and started checking the peephole obsessively. She can't leave until whatever it is that's blocking her view is gone.

She just can't.

It feels like someone is sitting on her chest, leaving her unable to take a full breath, and the relief lies solely on the other side of whatever is blocking her front door.

"It's been"—she checks her watch—"Fourteen minutes and twelve seconds. That's too long. I can't see. Can you come over?"

Alice gives a tired sigh, and the knot in Bella's stomach tightens.

"_Bells, I love you. Truly, I do; you know this. I can't just up and leave work because you're more than likely overreacting." Alice huffs. "Damn it. Mom should be here for you in times like this. Why don't I call Jasper and see if he can stop by?"_

Bella bites her lip so hard she can taste blood at the mention of their mother.

"No. No. I think I can handle this. Don't call her, please."

"_Of course, I wouldn't, I was just saying. I'm sorry for bringing her up."_

Alice assures her that she's got this, and Bella ends the call soon after.

She checks the peephole one last time, groaning when she sees that it's still blocked.

It takes everything in her to unlock the deadbolt and pull the chain.

She opens the door a fraction of an inch, takes a calming breath, and calls out, but her voice is muffled by the thick mattress taking up her entire doorway.

She can hear people, perhaps a couple, arguing about something next door.

Instincts tell her to close the door and call her sister's fiancé, but she squashes those feelings.

Just like Alice said, she's totally got this.

At least, she thinks she does.

Bella clears her throat and opens the door a bit wider.

"Hello? Is someone there?"

"Shit, Em, you didn't move the fucking mattress?" A masculine voice snaps before the mattress is removed in the blink of an eye.

The sun peeking out of the clouds burns her eyes, and Bella wants nothing more than to close the door and lock it quickly.

It's not that she doesn't like people ... she just doesn't trust them.

Before she can retreat to the solitude of her home, a pair of dark green eyes, crinkled in the corners from the deep, almost goofy grin on the face they belong to, pop up.

Out of habit, Bella finds herself taking a step back.

"Sorry about that. My brother-in-law thought I moved the bed, and I thought he moved it. You know how it is?" The owner of the green eyes chuckles. "I'm Edward, by the way. Edward Cullen. I just signed the lease, so I guess that makes us neighbors for a while."

"I suppose," Bella mumbles. "I own my townhouse."

She's itching to close the door on his handsome face.

He makes her nervous.

But then again, who doesn't?

"Well, that's lucky, I guess." Edward shrugs. "I bet you're happy to be able to leave now that we've gotten the mattress out of the way. Sorry again."

"I'm not leaving. I just like to be able to see out of my peephole," Bella admits and immediately flushes with embarrassment.

_Maybe Alice was right, and she was overreacting about the entire situation._

"Oh. Okay. Well, you can see out of it now. I'll let you get to it."

Edward frowns in confusion, and Bella decides she's had enough social interaction for the day.

She starts to shut the door.

"Hey, you never told me your name. We're neighbors, so we'll be seeing each other often. We should at least know each other on a first name basis."

"I'm Bella," she squeaks.

The door doesn't slam shut, but it still closes with a click that rings in her ears. She immediately reaches for the locks and automatically peeks through the peephole.

She's surprised to see her new neighbor's face in full view—he looks confused and disappointed.

The guilt building inside her slowly takes over the panic and anxiety.

She hates hurting people's feelings or being a disappointment, but it is what it is.

She is what she is.

If her neighbor plans on seeing her, he'll be sorely disappointed.

Bella gets everything delivered, and when she can't, she relies on her sister or simply misses out.

Her orders are left on the front porch, and she waits until the courier is long gone before snatching her packages into the house.

It's been almost two years since she left her home.

Despite the therapy and the constant support from her sister and Jasper.

She's stuck.

But Alice is a godsend. She's patient, but sometimes, like today, she has to put her foot down.

Bella wants to call and let her know that she opened the door. That she talked with her new neighbor, and she didn't pass out or die like she thought she would.

Instead, she heads to the kitchen and pulls out the ingredients for Alice's favorite peanut butter oatmeal muffins.

The least she can do is bake her sister something delicious as a form of appreciation for all her love and support.

It takes her a while to get the muffins in the oven because she obsessively checks the peephole to make sure she can still see out of it.

It remains unblocked for the rest of the day, and as the hours pass by, Bella feels the stress slowly melt away.

**Till next time, XOXO Ashley**


	2. The Hunk 2

**A few readers have asked what my update schedule will be. There is a hurricane headed our way so until we're out of the danger zone I plan on winging it. Like always I've prewritten everything so the story itself is finished. **

**You'll notice that the POV changes every other chapter. Our Hermit is always a negative number, and Hunk will be positive.**

**2**

**The Hunk**

Emmett is still trying to decipher the complex instructions for the simple kitchen table when Edward returns.

"Is she hot?" his brother-in-law asks without looking up from his project.

"Who?"

"The chick next door? She sounded pissed. Pissed means feisty." Emmett wiggles his eyebrows. "Feisty means sexy. So, is she hot?"

"I'm not sure. She barely opened her door. All I could see were her brown eyes." Edward rubs his throbbing temple. "Her eyes were beautiful though."

If he closes his eyes, he can still see the dark, chocolate brown eyes hidden in the shadows behind the door. She mostly talked to the ground, but when she did look up, all he could do was get lost in them. The moment didn't last long, but when it happened, he could feel the anxiety rolling off her in waves.

Emmett gives a disappointed shrug and turns his attention back to the table.

That's the end of the discussion about Edward's new neighbor, but it doesn't mean she isn't in his thoughts.

As he makes his way from the moving truck back up the small walkway that leads to their houses, he hopes to catch a glimpse of her.

They fight the mattress up the stairs and manage to squeeze Edward's loveseat through the narrow front door before it starts raining.

The landlord told him he could paint if he wanted, but Edward decided that the off-white walls would suit him just fine.

It's not like he has much need to decorate.

He doesn't have anyone to impress.

Edward's new to town and hasn't had a chance to meet anyone yet.

His thoughts stray to his mysterious neighbor with big brown eyes, but he shakes it off and drops a box of toiletries in the bathroom.

They're almost done when Emmett injures his hand trying to hang the TV on the wall, and Edward loses his help. He calls his sister to come pick up her accident-prone husband and take him to the hospital.

Rosalie doesn't sound surprised.

She does let out a colorful string of curse words before telling her brother that she's on her way and shows up with a trash bag that she wraps around the injury. Rosalie threatens Emmett that he's dead if he gets any blood on her upholstery before they jet off.

Edward turns on the radio and sets about making his new house a home.

He unpacks his DVD collection first and throws a couple on the coffee table so he can watch them later.

After hanging up all of his shirts and chef jackets and putting the rest of his clothes in his dresser, he decides to take a shower to wash off the sweat and grime of moving.

Edward curses loudly when he's soaking wet and realizes he hasn't come across the box with the towels yet. He's left slipping and sliding along the hardwood floor into his bedroom where he finds an extra fitted sheet.

It's better than nothing, so he uses it to dry off the best he can before pulling on a pair of sweatpants.

He's microwaving a frozen dinner when he smells warm peanut butter wafting in through his open kitchen window.

Edward fucking loves peanut butter.

His stomach growls.

_Beautiful eyes and she can bake. _

He sits at the kitchen table and scarfs down the microwaved macaroni and cheese. The pasta is gummy, and it tastes nothing like cheese, but his choices are limited until he can get to a grocery store.

Edward's halfway through his second movie when he hears a small, almost indiscernible tap at the front door.

He pauses the movie and opens the door just as Bella's slides shut with a soft click. He can hear the locks engaging and looks down to find a plate of muffins sitting precariously on the little partition that separates his stoop from his neighbor's.

Carrying the plate inside, he sets it on the coffee table.

Edward contemplates whether he should eat them. They look edible, but he knows nothing about his neighbor except for her first name and that she has pretty eyes.

She could be crazy.

The landlord never divulged the fate of the last tenant.

They could have been poisoned by delicious-looking baked goods.

He takes a sniff.

They don't smell poisonous, and that's good enough for him.

Edward takes a giant bite out of one of the muffins and throws his head back, groaning with pleasure.

Before he knows it, he's gobbled up all four and chuckles at the handwritten note scribbled on the paper plate.

_Welcome to the neighborhood. These muffins aren't poisoned or anything, so I hope you didn't throw them away. I mean, it's okay if you did, it's not like you know me or anything. I hope you liked them if you didn't toss them. -Bella_

She's intriguing, that much is true.

If there's one thing Edward Cullen loves more than peanut butter, it's a good mystery.

**Please keep everyone in Dorian's path in your thoughts. **

**Till next time, XOXO Ashley**


	3. The Hermit 3

**Just poppin' in. Dorian is still looming, but we're keeping our fingers and toes crossed.**

**3**

**The Hermit**

It's been a little over a week since Bella left her new neighbor, Edward, a plate of housewarming muffins and, boy, does she regret it.

It starts with knocks on her front door and soft pleas, but those are easy to ignore. She just puts on her noise-canceling headphones and loses herself in whatever menial task she's doing at the time while listening to _Pandora_.

When Alice pops by to drop off fresh produce, she finds a flower attached to Bella's doorknob. Bella is able to deflect her questions by revealing the remaining muffins, which are very much appreciated.

One of her packages never arrives even though the tracking says it did. Bella decides to wait a few days before contacting someone about it. She hates talking on the phone but knows there are not enough muffins in the world to convince Alice to make the call for her.

She thinks Edward finally got the hint, but of course, nothing is ever that easy for her.

Bella is surprised when a slip of paper slides under the front door while she's vacuuming her living room. If she weren't facing in that direction, she would have missed it. When she looks through the peephole she finds it empty, so she picks up the note.

_I'm holding your Amazon package hostage until you let me repay you for those amazing muffins. How does dinner sound? -Edward_

Bella's hands start to sweat, the paper wrinkling as her fingers curl in on themselves.

She hasn't been asked out on a date in ages, if that's what he's insinuating. Hell, even if it's just a simple way to show his appreciation, she wouldn't be able to.

This isn't something she can handle.

She should probably call her sister.

Bella is so busy freaking out that she doesn't notice the second note sliding underneath the door until it brushes against her bare toes.

This note is less calculated and more hurried than the last.

_I'm not really holding your package hostage! I brought it in because it was raining. Please don't call the cops on me. Mail fraud is not the way I want to go down. Not that I want to go down. Forget the invitation to dinner. I've embarrassed myself enough. Your package is on your doorstep. Sorry!_

Bella can't help the nervous laugh that bubbles out of her.

She would never have thought to call the police on something as stupid as her neighbor stealing her package.

It's just a couple pairs of writing gloves she bought for her sister. Alice's birthday is coming up soon, and she's always complaining about how sweaty her hands get when she's at work. Her job requires her to be on the computer a lot.

Bella opens her door slowly, peeking out of the crack and sees the box exactly where he said it would be.

She reaches out, but a hand grabs her wrist before she can snatch it inside. With a surprised squeak, she immediately tries to recoil back to the safety of her home.

"Please talk to me," Edward says softly, releasing his hold. "Have I done something to offend you? I swear I didn't mean to burn the popcorn the other night. My new microwave spazzed, and before I knew it, the entire bag was in flames. I freaked out and threw the whole thing out the back door. I didn't think it would make the whole neighborhood reek until I was leaving for work the next morning. I've been meaning to take care of it."

Bella sets her package inside, takes a deep breath, and pokes her head out.

Behind the door, her hands subconsciously rub together, and goosebumps break out across her heated flesh.

"I know this is going to sound super cliche, but it's not you. It's me," she tells him, looking at the spot just above his head to avoid making eye contact. "I'm not worth the trouble or your time, so just consider me thanked and please don't hold my mail hostage again."

He opens his mouth to reply, but she's already back inside, sliding the door shut.

"I'm not giving up on you, Bella. I don't care what you say," he says through the hardwood she hides behind.

It's faint, but Bella can still hear his words.

She presses her clammy forehead against the door as a lone tear falls down her cheek followed by a few more.

She's frustrated.

He's a very handsome man and seems interested in getting to know her.

If she were 'normal', she'd be out on the stoop talking to him without worrying about doing or saying something wrong. Without the crippling paranoia over what he must be thinking of her. She'd accept his invitation to dinner and flirt without the constant wondering if it's all a trick or if he's just trying to mess with her.

Bella lost her faith that good people exist a long time ago.

Somehow, along the way, she lost her faith entirely.

Instead, Bella is stuck inside these four walls that make up her home. She talks to Alice, her sister's fiancé Jasper, and her psychiatrist, but that's it.

"You're too stuck inside your head," Zafrina tells her all the time.

"People are busy living their own lives, Bella. They don't have time to watch every single thing you do and judge you," Alice says as if it were that simple.

"We don't understand your issues. That's all," her mother explained as if that were a proper excuse, one they often use to avoid her before she put her foot down.

They don't understand.

No one does.

Bella tries to swallow the pain of the past and decides to call it an early night.

Nightmares plague her, keeping her awake, staring into the darkness and wishing that one day she'll wake up 'normal'.

**till next time, XOXO Ashley**


	4. The Hunk 4

**We got super lucky with Dorian. Fingers crossed the storm continues to veer right.**

**4**

**The Hunk**

Edward is stupefied when he finally sees Bella's face for the first time.

Even panic-stricken, she's still breathtaking.

He knows he shouldn't have touched her like that. It was stupid of him, doing something so bold.

When she tells him that she isn't worth it, the evident pain in her voice hits him straight in the heart. She slams her door, and he registers the thud on the other side. He stands up, placing his hand on the hardwood.

"I'm not giving up on you, Bella. I don't care what you say," he says.

He thinks he might hear a sniff or maybe a soft sob, and he wants to break down the door and make her smile. He'd do anything to wipe the sad frown off her pretty face.

Instead, he steps over the small fence separating their stoops, goes inside, and drops onto his couch with a heavy sigh. His hands find his hair, and they pull in frustration. He wants to scream, but he's afraid she'd hear him, and that wouldn't do either of them any good.

There is only one thing he can think to do, so he calls his sister.

"_What's up, bitch?" _Rosalie greets.

"I'm in trouble," Edward says sadly.

"_Legal or personal? I can have Emmett come up with bail money, I guess. With his history, it wouldn't be hard to make it look like an accident," _she says thoughtfully.

Edward can't help but laugh. "You don't have to kill your husband, but I appreciate the sentiment. It's a personal matter."

"_Did you get some whore pregnant?"_

"No, dumb ass. You have to get laid in order to procreate, and my focus has been on The Bakery. Will you just shut up and listen to my problem?"

Rosalie hums and tells him to go on.

Edward tells her everything about Bella. It's not much, but he tends to ramble a lot.

"_You want my honest opinion?"_

"I wouldn't have called you for anything less, Ro," Edward says.

"_You've got a lot of work to do. She's obviously damaged, so you need to make sure this is something you want to take on. You're going to have to take it slow. Like turtle slow. Capiche?" _

"So, what should I do? Keep slipping notes under her door?"

"_Yeah, but put some romance into that shit. Continue with the flowers on her doorknob. Bake her something special, not something you bring home from The Bakery."_

"I bake everything there, so what difference would it make?"

"_Come on, Edward. Let her smell that shit through the walls. Show her you're putting in the effort." _

Rosalie gives Edward some more advice before he hears a loud bang.

"_Shit. Emmett just fell off the fucking ladder. I think he knocked himself out again. I gotta go."_

She hangs up.

Edward makes a mental list of things he could bake for Bella. Something he doesn't make for The Bakery. Rosalie is right; she deserves something special.

He finally decides to make white chocolate macadamia nut cookies with a Godiva drizzle. After he makes a list of ingredients he'll need to pick up after work, he heads to bed.

Once he's settled under the covers, he tries hard to listen for any noise on the other side of the wall, but all he gets is silence.

The three days that follow are shit for Edward.

For some reason or another, he gets held up at work. It's not at all surprising, considering the fact that the doors have only been open for a couple weeks.

Edward's head is so far in the clouds that he burns batch after batch.

He's frustrated to the point of tears when he finally gets thirteen perfect cookies, drizzled with chocolate, plated on the special dish he picked up just for this occasion.

He steps over the fencing and stands in front of Bella's door.

Edward has learned enough to know that Bella won't open the door if she sees him on the other side. He came prepared and pulls the sheet of paper out of his pocket and slips it under the door. After setting the cookies on the welcoming mat, he knocks softly.

Then Edward goes back inside and waits.

**till next time, XOXO Ashley**


	5. The Hermit 5

**5**

**The Hermit**

"How have you been since our last meeting, Bella?" Zafrina asks, the pen in her hand tapping against the edge of her binder.

Bella, familiar with the pattern, watches and counts the taps until Zafrina repeats the question.

"I've been okay, I think," she tells her. "I have a new neighbor."

"Oh, that's good. I noticed that the 'For Rent' sign was gone." Her psychiatrist smiles. "Do you know anything about the new tenants?"

"Yeah, I guess." Bella straightens a bowl of potpourri on the coffee table. "It's a single man. At least, I think he's single. He looks to be around my age, maybe a little older. His name is Edward."

"That's a lot of information."

"When he was moving in, he accidentally blocked my peephole. I had a mild panic attack and called my sister to see if she could come help, but she couldn't."

"How did that make you feel?" Zafrina inquires.

"I can't keep letting my issues affect my sister. Alice has a job, and she has a life. She and Jasper already do a lot for me. I knew if I wanted the problem to be resolved then I'd have to take matters into my own hands."

"And how did that go?"

"I opened the door. Not wide or anything. There was a mattress on my front porch. I called out until someone heard me, and that's when Edward introduced himself."

Bella can't help the smile forming on her face.

Of course, her psychiatrist notices this.

"I have a feeling there's more to this story. If you're comfortable with the topic, please go on."

"Um. I made Alice some of her favorite muffins, and on a whim, I left some on Edward's stoop. Welcoming him to the neighborhood or whatever," Bella explains. "And then he started knocking on my door and leaving flowers and stuff. He even went as far as holding a package of mine for ransom."

Zafrina's eyes widen.

Bella nods.

"He slid a note under my door, asking me out to dinner. I freaked out, and he slid another note, begging me not to call the cops on him for stealing my mail. He said he left the package on my stoop, so I reached out to get it, and he grabbed me."

"How did you react?"

"I don't have a problem with people touching me. I mean, I don't like it, but I can tolerate it. It still freaked me out because I wasn't anticipating it. He apologized and rambled a lot and told me he wanted to thank me for the muffins. He wanted to talk, but by then, I'd reached my limit. I told him I couldn't and that I wasn't worth it. I closed my door after that, but I think I heard him say he wasn't giving up."

Zafrina smiles wide, and the ever-present anxiety knot in Bella's stomach tightens.

"That's wonderful, Bella. You obviously had to leave your house, even if it was just a little, and you were able to have a brief conversation with someone without calling my emergency number." She closes her binder. "But we have to work on the fact that you don't see yourself as worth it."

They talk a little about Bella's parents and their inability to understand her.

Zafrina assures her that she has family in her sister and advises that she should at least try to be Edward's friend. She deserves to have someone besides Alice and Jasper in her life.

Bella promises that she'll work on it, and they end the session on a good note. Zafrina gives her a bit of homework to work on, but Bella's going to try not to stress about it.

She walks Zafrina to the door but stands five feet away from the threshold as the doctor leaves. When the door shuts, she rushes over and engages the locks.

She won't see her doctor again for another month unless there's an emergency, so she has plenty of time to figure out how to meet the goal they've set.

Bella always feels exhausted after a session, and instead of busying herself in the kitchen, she settles in front of the television. The movie she finds holds her attention until someone knocks on the door.

Her stomach clenches and her throat constricts as she looks through the peephole, but it's dark, so she can't see much.

A piece of paper slides underneath the door.

_I promise this isn't a trick. I'm not going to jump out and grab you again. I made you something to thank you for the muffins. No strings attached unless you feel compelled to return the favor. They keep better if you store them in a Ziploc bag. Enjoy. -Edward_

Bella opens her door a crack and turns the porch light on.

When Bella is sure she's alone, she slips a hand out the gap and picks up the plate sitting on her porch.

Cookies.

Delicious-looking cookies.

She takes them to the kitchen and picks one up.

It's still warm, and white chocolate pours out when she breaks it apart.

They taste just as delicious as they look.

Bella decides to eat three for dinner and puts the rest in a baggie.

She's cleaning the chocolate-covered plate when she notices words scrawled across it in familiar handwriting. If she'd scrubbed a little harder, it would have disappeared.

_If you'd like to say thank you, feel free to text me. 555-9021. No pressure._

The last time a boy gave Bella his number, she was in high school; it ended up being the number to a local strip club. Bella was crushed, and as much as she would love to blame Mike Newton's bullying for her slippery slope to where she is today, she can't.

She can recall the day, the month, and the year her world flipped upside down, and she stopped being herself. If she thought about it, she could tell you the hour, maybe even the minute it happened, but she tries really hard to keep herself from going down that road.

Bella takes a deep, calming breath and reaches for her phone.

She can totally do this.

Right?


	6. The Hunk 6

**6**

**The Hunk**

Edward would love to say that he didn't sit on his couch, cradling his phone, waiting for it to ring.

He'd love to say that, but he can't.

It feels like he's been sitting for hours, willing it to go off, and almost drops it when it finally does.

_These cookies are amazing. Thank you very much._

He doesn't care that he's coming off too eager; he immediately replies.

**I'm glad you like them. I bake for a living, but I made these cookies especially for you to thank you for those amazing muffins. How did you know that I love peanut butter?**

_Lucky guess. I figured if I wanted more cookies, I'd have to respond to your plate demand. You're a baker? That is awesome. I love being in the kitchen. _

**You should see the bakery my sister and I just opened. The kitchen is a baker's dream. I can honestly say that I love my job. **

_That's great. Most people find it hard to find work that balances out with their passion._

Edward smiles because he is lucky.

It doesn't hurt that he and his sister own The Bakery, but still.

**What are you passionate about, Bella?**

His phone is dead silent for a while.

Maybe she fell asleep.

Or maybe he said something that scared her off.

Edward reads through their texts but can't find anything that would garner being ignored.

But Rosalie warned him to tread lightly. Maybe Bella misconstrued something.

Was his last question really that bad?

The great thing about Rosalie is that she'll definitely help him figure out what he did wrong.

She's most likely going to try to beat some sense into him.

Edward puts his phone away and gets to work, cleaning up the massive cookie mess that has taken over his kitchen.

He's elbow deep in the dishwater when his pocket starts vibrating, and Edward can't dry his hands off fast enough.

_Sorry, I was trying to find an answer to your question. When I was in high school, I wanted to be a photographer. Go out on location and make permanent memories. But my plans fell through, and now I don't have a passion._

Edward's fingers fly over the phone screen.

**No passion? I refuse to believe that. Whatever happened to photography? **

_It's a very long story. Goodnight, Edward. _

Before Edward can reply his phone goes off again.

_Just so you know. It took a lot for me to text you. A LOT. _

**Well, I'm glad you did. Goodnight, Bella.**

Edward turns his radio on and finds himself dancing around and singing as he cleans his kitchen. His smile doesn't fall as he shaves the scruff off his chin, showers, and falls into bed.

The next day at work, Edward can't help but snap pictures of all the equipment before he turns everything on to preheat for the day ahead.

He wants to send them to Bella, but it's still very early in the morning, and she probably wouldn't appreciate being woken up just because he wants to show off his kitchen.

Instead, he gets everything together and goes over the day's menu, including the special of the day.

Rosalie shows up with a big smile on her face.

"How are things with your mystery girl?" sShe asks, jumping up on the counter next to where Edward is kneading the dough for a batch of blueberry scones.

"Things are going. We're on a texting basis." He grins.

"Ooh. That's progress. Have you decided on the special of the day? Will you write it on the board? You're better at artsy shit."

Edward nods and follows her through the double doors that lead to the storefront.

Rosalie hands him a bucket of chalk and tells Edward to go to town.

He works quickly, knowing the timer on his scones will go off soon.

When he's finished, he pulls out his phone and snaps a picture of his masterpiece.

Edward returns to the kitchen and starts filling trays with pastries and other delicacies he's prepared.

He's especially careful with plating the special of the day, taking pictures before handing them off to Rosalie.

"Really, Edward?" She nods toward the storefront.

He smiles and pushes her out the door. She is his sister, so he might push her a little too roughly, causing her to stumble and flip him the bird.

His day passes by quickly. He's busy for a Wednesday, selling out of a lot of things and having to restock the display case numerous times.

The special is a big hit, and he has had to make three large batches by the time Rosalie locks the front door.

"Damn. I think this girl is good for you," she says. "You keep baking like that, and we'll be able to buy that extra mixer you've been whining about."

"I do not whine," Edward grumbles, pulling his phone out of his pocket.


	7. The Hermit 7

**7**

**The Hermit**

When Bella wakes up the morning after she and Edward talked via text message, she doesn't feel an ounce of regret.

Well, there is a little bit.

She was serious when she told him that she has no passion anymore. Admitting that fact hurt her a lot more than she thought it would.

Sometimes, it's hard for her to get out of bed, much less give her all into something.

Sure, she has things that she enjoys doing, but she could live with or without them, so she wouldn't consider them a passion.

She smiles anyway while she goes through her routine.

Zafrina insists that it's not an obsessive-compulsive disorder, which is a good thing because Bella already has enough to deal with.

She just likes for things to be clean and orderly because she spends all of her time in this space. She has certain things she does on certain days, and today happens to be Wednesday. She dresses in a pair of cut-off sweats and a tank top, planning to give the kitchen floor a good scrub.

She could use a mop, but she enjoys the fresh lemon scent of the floor cleaner, and down here, she can get all the nooks and crannies.

When the floor is shining, and she feels accomplished for the day, Bella takes a long bath with tons of bubbles, refilling the tub with hot water multiple times. She reads a paperback, careful not to get the pages wet, and gets lost in the story.

Bella gets so lost that she manages to fall asleep and wakes up to cold bath water and a waterlogged book.

She turns the shower on to warm up and wash away the bubbles.

Still chilled to the bone, she decides to dress in her favorite flannel pajamas despite the fact that it's still early in the day.

Alice isn't planning on stopping by, so there's no worry that she'll be judged for dressing for bed before five o'clock.

She adds a pair of thick fuzzy socks and pulls her hair up into a messy bun on the top of her head.

After checking the soup she put in the crock pot when she woke up, Bella decides to curl up on the couch and watch the movie based on the book she accidentally destroyed.

It's a romantic drama laced with so much angst and heartache that she finds herself crying right along with the characters.

Her phone starts vibrating off the coffee table, and the text alert goes off repeatedly.

She manages to catch it before it lands face down on the floor.

And just like that, she's smiling like a loon.

**Good afternoon. I would have texted you earlier but my day starts at five, and I didn't think you'd appreciate that.**

**I wanted to show you my kitchen. Isn't she beautiful?**

The next twenty messages are pictures of a large kitchen filled with everything one would need to prepare enough baked goods to feed an army.

Bella is quick to reply.

_I think I'm in love with your industrial oven. The things I could bake. ALL AT ONCE!_

**I would love to have you in my kitchen.**

Bella's smile falls, but it doesn't last long.

**So, I get to make a special of the day on Wednesdays. We have a pre-planned special for any other day of the week, but Wednesdays are mine. Anything I want.**

_If you made my cookies for profit, I might have to kill you!_

_I'm kidding. You can do whatever you want. Sorry._

**Don't apologize. I would never make those for anyone but you.**

_Okay, I'll bite. What did you make for the special today?_

Instead of a reply, she gets another picture.

Familiar script with an added flare. Bella's smile widens when she reads the words.

_**Bella's Brownies**_

_No one has ever dedicated something to me before. Thank you, Edward._

That's a lie.

Mean girls in the seventh grade dedicated a song to her from a secret admirer at the only dance she ever attended. She thought she would never be more embarrassed than she was when she realized what had happened.

She was so wrong.

**Really? That gives me so many ideas.**

_No. Please. No._

**Too late, Sugar.**

_Sugar?_

**You like to bake. I like to bake. Sugar is a big part of baking. Would you rather me call you Yeast?**

_No. I'd prefer that you call me Bella but I guess Sugar is better than Yeast._

**So much better. I'm helping my sister close the shop and then headed to the grocery store. Do you need anything?**

Bella can't help but feel warm. He's very thoughtful.

But she can't help but question if it's all just a façade.

_Nope. Drive safe. Talk to you later?_

**Thanks, Sugar.**

Bella is packing the leftover soup into a Tupperware bowl when her phone dings.

**Hey, Sugar?**

_Yes, Honey?_

**Honey?**

_Since you gave me a nickname it's only fair that I give you one. Honey is better than Peanut Butter, don't you think?_

**I do love peanut butter, but that would be a mouthful.**

_Do you need something?_

**Now that you mention it. Can I borrow a cup of sugar?**


	8. The Hunk 8

**8**

**The Hunk**

Edward decides to be selfish.

Bella told him it took a lot for her to text him, but he wants to see her. Needs to see her.

So he tells a little white lie.

_Didn't you just go shopping?_

**Yes, but I forgot the main ingredient.**

_Meet me at my door in a second._

She opens the door slowly until it's wide open, and Edward gulps.

He knew she was beautiful before just by the quick glimpse of her face, but now that he's getting the full experience, he's caught off guard.

Bella is taller than average but still a tad bit shorter than him. She's a bigger girl with curves for days, and Edward's mouth waters just looking at her.

He notices that she's dressed in pajamas and smiles at the technicolor socks on her feet.

And then he realizes she's frowning and fidgeting, obviously uncomfortable with his blatant ogling.

"Sorry. Just, wow," he blurts out. "You're so beautiful."

She doesn't say anything for a moment.

"You don't have to say that. Here's your sugar and some soup I made today. It's cheddar broccoli," Bella whispers, a deep blush forming high on her cheeks.

She moves to pass the bowls over, and Edward notices that she doesn't move any closer to the threshold.

"I didn't really need the sugar. I just wanted to see you, Sugar."

"Oh."

Her frown deepens, and he feels like an asshole.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have had a hidden agenda. But I'm glad to finally see more than a pair of eyes," Edward admits, shuffling the bowls into one hand before extending the other toward her.

"It's nice to finally meet you officially."

Bella's eyes dart from the threshold to Edward's hand and then back again.

He makes a bold step and leans in farther until they're almost touching.

"Take my hand, Sugar."

She slides her hand into his.

Her palm is warm and soft.

Edward can't help but notice the small tremble.

"Hi, Sugar."

"Hi, Honey," Bella smiles, squeezing his fingers before letting go. "Thank you."

"For what? You gave me dinner and sugar that I don't need. I should be thanking you."

She laughs and shakes her head.

"You don't push, and you helped me with my homework."

"Homework? Are you in school?"

Edward doesn't understand how in the world he could have helped her.

Bella's blush returns.

"No. My psychiatrist gave me homework this week. She wanted me to open my door completely if you knocked. You didn't knock, but I think it still counts," she explains to the floor.

Edward isn't surprised to hear that Bella is in therapy. She's obviously got something going on. "I'm glad I was able to help. Feel free to use me anytime."

Bella points to the bowl. "You might want to eat that soon, seeing as your microwave died. If it gets cold it'll coagulate," she says.

Edward can tell she's reached her limit.

He thanks her for the soup and the sugar and watches her close the door, not leaving until he hears the locks engage.

Edward doesn't even bother with a spoon. He sits at his kitchen table, sips straight from the bowl, and reaches for his phone.

**You are a goddess. This soup is just what I needed. Thank you.**

_You're welcome. It's my gran's recipe._

**Well, thank you, Bella's gran. Hey, Sugar?**

_Sup, Honey?_

**I know you're not ready to talk about everything with me, but I want you to know a couple of things. You are worth the effort, and I'm willing to put in my all. I understand what a big deal tonight was for you.**

_Good night, Edward._

Edward frowns.

She didn't call him Honey.

She didn't acknowledge his words.

He calls Rosalie and relays the entire night's events.

"_Well, it's pretty obvious, ass hat,"_ she tells him when he's finished.

"What's obvious?"

"_You're such an idiot. It's obvious that she doesn't believe you. She thinks you're lying. Also, what in the world made you think it was okay to come up with a nickname before you even saw her? Emmett wants to know if she's hot."_

"How do I get her to believe me? The nickname thing just happened, and tell your husband to shut the fuck up."

"_I contemplate covering his mouth with duct tape daily, but you know how he is. With my luck, he'd hyperventilate, pass out, and hit his head on the coffee table. I'm too young to be a widow."_

"Goodnight, Rosalie."

"_Wait! I have an idea. It's crazy, but it just might work. We'll talk about it tomorrow."_ There are distinct slapping sounds on the other end of the phone. "_Emmett, if you don't stop grabbing my tit, I'm going to push you down the stairs. I'm talking to my brother. That's all kinds of twisted."_

"Goodnight, Rosalie," Edward says again, hanging up before he witnesses a murder.

He composes a text message and hits send before stomping up the stairs and falling into bed fully clothed.

**I'm so sorry, Sugar. I never want to do anything to make you uncomfortable. Please don't shut me out. I'm worth it. I promise.**


	9. The Hermit 9

**9**

**The Hermit**

After she empties the contents of her stomach and chokes down a little white pill, Bella begins debating. It's late. Should she call Zafrina's emergency number? How pissed would her sister be if she called her? She contemplates and finally picks up her phone.

"Bella? Is everything okay?" Alice asks.

"Um. I don't know. I'm sorry for calling so late."

"It's no big deal. I'm up late finishing some work I brought home, and Jasper went to bed ages ago. What's going on?"

Bella takes a deep breath, her eyes water, and she sniffs.

"I just really need my sister right now. Can you please come over? I wouldn't ask you if I wasn't desperate."

"I'll be there in ten. I'll let myself in."

Bella is curled up in the middle of her bed when her sister arrives.

Alice wraps her tiny body around her and waits for the sobs to subside before asking for an explanation.

Bella blows her nose and points to her phone.

She watches her sister read the messages. Her confusion is replaced with a big smile.

"Who's Edward?"

"My new neighbor," she croaks.

"He seems sweet, Bells. What's wrong?"

"I can't stop thinking that he's lying. That he's just like James, and that he's out to make my life more miserable than it already is. I can't handle going through that again," Bella wails.

"Bells, come on. Not everyone is like James. This guy seems like he's genuine."

Bella's phone goes off but shakes her head when Alice tries to hand it to her.

She just can't. Not right now.

She watches her sister read the text message with bated breath.

"Bella. For real. I think he really likes you." Alice pats her head. "You've gotta open your heart up again. You can't keep living like this. It's slowly killing you, and it's killing me to watch you struggle."

Bella wipes her eyes.

"Jasper and I have been waiting for you to have a breakthrough to get married."

Alice's words do nothing to ease the guilt Bella already feels when it comes to their family. Because when her parents gave up on her, Alice gave up on them.

She's given up a lot for Bella, and it hurts to know that her sister has put yet another part of her life on hold because she can't get her shit together.

"I'm not telling you that to make you feel bad. I'm just saying that we're supporting you. You will overcome this. You have to have faith." She holds up Bella's cell phone. "And Edward might be the push you need."

Bella nods.

She knows Edward has stirred up a lot of feelings she thought died a long time ago.

He makes her stomach clench when he smiles, and when they shook hands for the first time tonight, she felt comfortable. Most of all, she felt safe.

And that's what terrifies her. But not as much as the texts he sent her.

It's so hard for her to believe that someone has good intentions. It took her a long time to trust Zafrina, and she pays the woman to spend time with her.

Bella's been hurt. So hurt she thought she would never survive. But she did ... in a way. It's hard to come back from what she's gone through in her life, but she's trying. She knows she could work harder, but something's always holding her back.

She can admit that she's made more progress in the short time since Edward moved in next door than she's made in a year.

That has to mean something.

She doesn't have to ask Alice to stay for a little while. Her little sister kicks off her shoes, pulls a blanket over both of them, and holds her until she falls asleep.


	10. The Hunk 10

**10**

**The Hunk**

Edward doesn't get any sleep. He tosses, turns, and flips around until the fitted sheet slips off the corner of the bed and tangles itself around him. He worries. He obsesses. And then his alarm goes off, and he has to get up and go to work.

He goes through the motions, brushing his teeth, buttoning his chef's jacket, and grabbing his phone.

He exits his townhouse at the same time a tiny pocket-sized version of Bella steps outside next door.

They both freeze with their hands on their respective doorknobs. Eyes locked. Both exhausted and maybe full of hope?

"You must be Edward."

"Yes, and you are?"

"Alice, Bella's sister."

"I didn't know she had a sister."

"I'm sure you've noticed that Bella isn't very forthcoming with information."

He nods.

"I know you don't know me or anything, but I need to ask you something." She bites her bottom lip, something he's seen Bella do when she's nervous.

She's always nervous.

"Yep?"

"I need you to keep doing whatever it is that you're doing." Alice's eyes water. "Don't let her push you away. But please, please, please don't break her heart. I know she's a lot of work, so if you aren't genuine with what you've told her, just walk away now. I don't think she could—"

"Alice, I'm sorry, but I have to get to work. I'm here. In whatever way Bella will have me. I'll take what she can give me. I meant everything I've said to her. The ball is in her court now."

"No. The ball will never be in her court. You don't understand." Tears stream down the girl's cheeks. "If you let her take control, it will get you nowhere. You have to push. You have to pull. You have to fight."

She's all but dropping to her knees to plead with him, and it breaks his heart.

He can see just how much Bella's suffering has affected her sister.

"I'll consider what you've said. I've gotta go. If I'm late, my sister will skin me alive," Edward tells her.

Alice just nods and walks down the pathway to her car without another word.

Edward works robotically the entire morning.

He ignores Rosalie's attempts to make conversation.

After baking the first round of goods for the day, he goes to the walk-in cooler and sits on a box, cradling his head in his hands.

He's racking his brain and blaming himself when Rosalie pops her head in.

"You've been in here for a while, and we both know Mom would kill me if I let you catch pneumonia. Put on your big boy panties and get us through the afternoon, and we'll close the shop early tonight," she tells him, holding the door open until he has no choice but to stand and follow her out.

Rosalie can see his two-day-old scruff and the dark circles under her brother's eyes.

She wants him to tell her what happened, but she knows Edward. If she pushes he'll pull away. He'll come to her when he's ready.

Edward is making a batch of colossal chocolate chip cookies and listening to power ballads on his phone when the song pauses, and he gets an alert that he has a new message.

He washes his hands and pulls the cell out of his jacket pocket.

_Honey, I'm sorry about last night. Sometimes, I can't shut off the part of my brain that thinks everyone is out to deceive me. I wasn't lying when I told you I'm not worth it. And no matter what you say, I'm not going to be able to instantly think differently. At least, not right now._

**I'm willing to wait. I will do anything to help you believe that I have the best of intentions. But please, don't shut me out. Last night was terrible for me.**

_Did you call your little sister in the middle of the night to come and be the big spoon while you lost your shit?_

**No. My big sister (I have a sister too) would come over and beat my ass with a wooden spoon if I called her after nine-thirty. **

_My sister is used to my brand of crazy. She's never come at me with cooking utensils ... yet. Knock on wood._

**I'm going to get used to your brand of crazy too. You just watch.**

_I don't know how to respond to that._

**You could just say, "Okay, Honey. That sounds wonderful. I can't wait." That would work for me.**

_Okay, Honey. You can try, but no hard feelings if it gets to be too much. _

Edward's about to reply when the smoke alarm hanging above the door starts screeching.

"Shit," he mutters, pulling the charcoal briquettes that used to resemble a batch of beautiful cookies out of the oven.

He's snapping a picture of them when Rosalie comes in, swinging a broom around like a mad woman.

"What the fuck, Ed?" She glares at him, waving the broom at the smoke alarm. "Are you seriously on your goddamn phone while you're burning down my bakery?"

**This is why I can't text and bake at the same time. Don't even think about apologizing because you are the best kind of distraction.**

"Technically, this is my bakery. I burned some cookies; stop being such a bitch." He grabs a towel and pushes her out of the way so he can fan the smoke away from the detector. "Open the back door."

Rosalie doesn't move for a second.

She sees the smile on her brother's face and figures he dug himself out of whatever hole he buried himself in last night.

"Ro, open the fuckin' door," Edward growls.

She flips him the bird and does as he demands.

It takes hours for the smoke to finally clear and the kitchen only faintly smells of burnt chocolate. Thanks to the change in Edward's attitude, they're able to keep the doors open until closing time.

Rosalie is bringing empty trays to the back when she catches her brother on his phone again.

He's smiling at the screen, so she doesn't say anything.

_I would say sorry if I wasn't laughing my butt off. What was that supposed to be?_

**I'll have you know they were colossal chocolate chip cookies the size of my head. Hey, Sugar?**

_Yeah, Honey?_

**Don't fight me on this. Don't make anything for dinner. I want to repay you for the soup. Don't argue. Just say, "Okay, Honey."**

_Okay, Honey ..._

Edward has a plan.

"So are you interested in the mega awesome idea I came up with last night?" Rosalie asks.

"Nope."

His sister frowns.

She spent a lot of time thinking about her idea, and he doesn't seem to care.

"Why?" Rosalie demands. "Are you all of a sudden too good for my ideas? Just last night, you were calling me, crying over this girl."

"I wasn't crying, Ro. I can handle this. I have a plan. Can you finish up here? I've got shit to do." He doesn't wait for her to answer.

He grabs his keys and rushes out of the building.

He really hopes that his plan doesn't blow up in his face


	11. The Hermit 11

**11**

**The Hermit**

_Okay, Honey ..._

Bella's mind goes to that dark place and immediately conjures up worst-case scenarios. She can't help it. It's just how her brain works.

One where Edward beats down her door and drags her out of the safety of her house, kicking and screaming. She can feel the panic at just the thought of being forced over the threshold.

The sheer terror that crawls up her backbone is frightening, even though the likelihood of that happening is slim. She knows Edward would never do anything so extreme.

At least, she hopes he wouldn't.

Another where he shows up and enters her home without her knowing? It's not like she can't allow someone in. She could. But she barely knows the man, and it took her almost three months to let Zafrina inside.

Bella has experienced enough surprises to know that she hates them.

She needs to be in control of the situation. The more she gets to know Edward, the more she can feel some of that control slipping away.

It's the third scenario that Bella obsesses over. A note sliding underneath the door telling her that he's changed his mind. That she's too much work and to delete his number.

Because out of the three, as horrifying as they all may seem, the thought of Edward walking away is what hurts Bella the most.

And she barely knows him.

She tries to take her mind off of things, distracting herself with menial tasks around the house, and eventually ends up on her couch with a basket full of yarn and a pair of knitting needles.

She's been working on a sweater for a while now. The right arm refuses to cooperate, so she pulls the string until she's back at the shoulder and starts over. Bella works quietly, focusing on her loop stitching, oblivious to what's going on outside her front door.

She gives a satisfied sigh when she finishes her project.

The sweater is long and dark beige. She can't help but pull it over her head.

She twists and turns, liking the way it falls a little longer than mid-thigh. She could wear it around the house as a dress if she wanted, but it still looks good over her light denim jeans.

Bella frowns when she realizes that the sleeves are a bit too long. It's something she can't change. What's done is done.

She contemplates starting a new project but decides against it, placing her knitting basket back where it goes.

Bella is busy dusting her house and ignoring the gnawing hunger in her stomach when there's a soft familiar tap at the door.

A piece of paper slips inside.

She picks it up, anticipating her worst fear becoming a reality.

_So, I wanted to take you out for dinner, but I know that's not possible RIGHT NOW. Instead, I came up with this crazy idea, and I really hope you don't slam the door in my face. I put a lot of thought into it. When you're ready, I'd like for you to grab a comfy pillow and open your door for me, wide._

Bella reads the letter once, twice, three times before she checks the peephole.

Empty.

She's not sure what to expect.

She grabs a big pillow from the couch and unlocks the door before opening it slowly.

Edward is sitting on a pillow, legs crossed awkwardly because her side of their shared stoop isn't very big, and he's a rather large man.

In front of him are boxes of Chinese take-out, plates, napkins, and various bottles of soda.

"I didn't know what you like, so I got a bit of everything." He blushes. "Well, a lot of everything. Whatever we don't eat tonight, I'll have leftovers ... for the next two weeks or forever."

"Okay?"

Bella is nervous.

She doesn't fully understand Edward's intentions until he points to a spot in front of where she stands. Three feet from the threshold.

"I'm not going to push, but I want you to at least try. Take a seat on your pillow and have dinner with me. You're safe in your house, and I'm out here."

Bella is frozen on the spot.

"Come on, Sugar. Have dinner with me."

The apprehension and hopeful undertone in his voice makes her heart ache.

Bella finds herself tossing the pillow onto the floor, pulling it to where she feels safe, and sits down with her legs crossed.

"I hope you brought chopsticks," she jokes with a laugh until she sees Edward's smile fall. "Oh, no. It's okay. I'll be right back."

She rushes into the kitchen, sliding across the tile, and slams into the counter with a loud thud.

"Shit!" she exclaims.

"Bella?" Edward calls.

"I'm fine. Just fine. Give me a second," she answers, rubbing her sore hip and rummaging through the utensil drawer until she finds what she's looking for.

"Are you okay?" Edward asks when she finally takes her seat.

"Yeah. I just slid across the floor and right into the counter. My hip will be a lovely shade of blue tomorrow," she assures and holds up two pairs of chopsticks triumphantly.

She's not freaking out.

She waits for it to hit her, the fact that she's sitting three feet away from the threshold and talking to someone.

A handsome someone.

But the panic never comes.

Edward's patient with her. He's willing to stretch to pass her cartons and a bottle of regular Coke. They fill their plates, and Bella tries to talk him through using chopsticks.

"How could you go through life without knowing how to eat Chinese food the proper way?" She laughs.

"Well, I've never felt the need to fight for my food before. A fork does its job efficiently," he grits out, growling in frustration when his noodles fall back onto the plate. "I give up. Give me back my fork."

"No," Bella says, scooting her pillow closer to him. "If I can teach my sister's fiancé how to use chopsticks, I'm sure I can figure out a way to teach you. Now come on."

If Edward's shocked that she willingly moved closer to him, he masks it well. She holds her hands out and motions for him to lift his.

Bella's not breathing when she takes Edward's hands in hers. She's trying to swallow the panic she knows will come. But it never does.

Instead of anxiety and Xanax, they argue and laugh until Bella gives up and throws a plastic fork at Edward's head.

He catches it before it makes an impact and starts digging into his food like a starving man.

"You're a hopeless case. I feel like I should get a wad of paper and a rubber band like restaurants do for little kids."

She tries to maintain eye contact while they converse, but it's difficult.

She's spent the past two years with her head pointed down, and before that, she was no social butterfly.

When they are stuffed to the gills, Edward produces a pair of fortune cookies.

Bella groans.

"I can't."

"You have to. It's tradition."

"So is eating with chopsticks."

Bella knows he's not going to let it go by the look on his face. She reaches out and snatches one at random, ripping it open with her teeth.

She breaks the hard cookie in half and laughs at the absurdity of her fortune.

"We don't know your fortune, but here's a cookie." She giggles.

"Mine is no better. A foolish man listens to his heart. A wise man listens to cookies."

"These are terrible fortunes," Bella states, plucking her fancy reusable chopsticks out of the mess they've created.

"But the company was enjoyable, right?"

"I had a very good time, Edward. Honestly. I can't remember the last time I've laughed so hard."

Edward beams.

"I think we should make this a habit, sharing dinner," he offers. "Why eat alone when we can have dinner together?"

Bella nods.

"That sounds good. But next time, I'm cooking."

"How does tomorrow night sound?"

Bella giggles. "Sure, Honey. I'll see you tomorrow."

When the door is shut, she leans against it with a dreamy smile.

Edward Cullen is definitely swoon worthy.


	12. The Hunk 12

**12**

**The Hunk**

Edward shares dinner with Bella in her doorway for a few weeks—that is until today when she texts him while he's at work, telling him that she wants to do something a little different tonight.

His imagination gets the best of him, and he sincerely hopes she doesn't try her hand at a vegetarian recipe again. Just thinking about the vegetarian chili Bella made last week causes his stomach to roll.

He tried really hard to swallow that first bite and failed miserably. He didn't want to hurt her feelings. It wasn't until Bella tried it that she realized the texture and aftertaste left something to be desired.

She threw out the chili while Edward ordered a pizza, and they laughed at the puzzled look on the delivery driver's face at the two of them. People eat at the threshold of townhouses all the time, right?

Rosalie boxes up some Wednesday special for him, tying a pretty pink bow around the soft yellow cardboard.

Bella told him that she doesn't imbibe, and he isn't much of a drinker, so Edward picks up a two-liter of vanilla Coke. He also grabs a small bouquet.

He lives to see Bella smile. She has the most beautiful set of dimples. He's seen a lot of those dimples over the past few weeks, and they still take his breath away.

He drives home and takes a quick shower because he had a mishap with a sack of flour and a sharp corner of one of the prep tables.

After changing into a pair of jeans and his favorite band tee, Edward practically skips down the stairs.

He grabs his pillow, the flowers, and the two-liter bottle before he stands in front of Bella's door and knocks his special knock.

It takes Bella a few minutes to answer the door, and when she does, his mouth waters.

Not because of the scent of roasted chicken wafting through the door. It smells great and all. No, he's almost drooling because Bella's wearing the sweater she made the day they first had dinner together. And nothing else.

Her legs are as bare as her feet, and her toes are painted bright purple.

She's got legs for days.

"Hey," Bella says, shifting uncomfortably underneath his gaze.

"Sorry." He shakes his head. "Sorry. You look great, Sugar."

Bella blushes and looks down at the items in his hands.

"Uh, I brought you flowers. I hope you like them." Edward all but shoves the bouquet in her face.

"Oomph. Thank you, Honey," Bella says, sniffing the flowers. "They're beautiful."

He wants to tell her that she's beautiful, but Bella doesn't like compliments. Her self-esteem isn't so great.

It's something he's been working on, but so far, it's been a slow process.

"I also brought you the best bottle I could find. Vintage." He holds the soda over his arm like he's presenting a fancy bottle of wine. "Very exclusive. Dating back to ..."

Edward looks for the expiration date. "Sometime around April maybe?"

Bella smiles his favorite smile and throws her head back, laughing. But then she gets a very serious look on her face.

"Okay. So, I had this idea, but I'm nervous."

"Please tell me it's not vegetarian?"

"God, no. Never again. I promised, remember?" She bites her lip, hard. "I was thinking ... maybe ... you could have dinner with me. If you wanted?"

"Um, Sugar. I don't know if you know this, but what we've been doing for the past few weeks? I think that's what most people would consider dinner. We've been doing that together so …"

Bella shakes her head.

"No. I meant to ask if you wanted to have dinner with me. Inside."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I mean you don't have to or anything. No pressure. I just thought because we sit on the floor for so long my legs go numb, and I have a perfectly good table and chairs." She takes a deep breath. "You know what? It's a stupid idea. Let me grab my pillow, and I'll plate up dinner. You like cauliflower, don't you?"

"Bella, I would love to come in and have dinner with you. But only if you're sure."

Bella stalls for a moment, and Edward sees the internal dilemma she's having. He lets her take her time and tries not to look too surprised when she steps to the side, inviting him in.

Her home is warm and very tidy. An exact mirror to his but entirely different. The walls are light gray and everything accentuates nicely. Instead of hardwood floors, she has blue-gray carpet. It's homey, with pictures hanging all over the walls, various prints of works of art that are probably hanging in museums somewhere.

"Dinner is ready. Let me just warm up the potatoes. Can you grab glasses and ice?"

She isn't ready to leave him alone in her space. He understands that.

Silently, he follows her into a kitchen that looks nothing like his.

"Where the heck did you find vintage appliances?" he asks, watching her stir something on the stove.

"They just look that way. My sister, Alice, found them when I decided to renovate." She looks up from the pot with a proud smile. "I did all the cabinetry and tile work myself."

"That's really impressive," Edward says, running his hand over the marble backsplash.

It's literally made out of marbles.

"The only issue I ran into was the delivery of the appliances. I went upstairs and let Alice handle the installation."

Edward can see that she's uncomfortable with the direction the conversation is going.

He holds up the Coke.

"Cups?"

Bella points to a cabinet, and Edward can't help but laugh at the Coca-Cola glasses that fill the shelves.

"Yeah, so I'm sort of obsessed with the soda that's really terrible for you, if you think about it. I mean, you can clean the toilet with it." She laughs. "I started drinking seltzer water to curb my addiction, but ever since we started having dinner together, I've been imbibing. You're a terrible influence on me."

Bella carries the potatoes over to a small table and sets them on a doily.

"Hey, now, don't blame it on me. You never told me that you had a problem with the stuff." Edward chuckles. "I've been enabling you for weeks. Practically pushing Coke at you like some kind of slimy drug dealer."

They laugh as he places the cups filled with ice on each side of the table.

"It smells delicious."

"I hope it tastes as good as it smells." She shrugs, taking a seat.

They tuck into their meal. It's delicious, but then again, aside from the chili, everything Bella makes is great. Edward finds himself groaning after each bite while Bella takes every compliment with a shy smile.

He's proud of her.

Inviting him inside her home is a big deal.

Asking him to stay after dinner is huge.

They sit on the couch and talk for hours about anything and everything, stopping only when Edward remembers the dessert his sister gave him. He rushes next door and returns to present Bella with the special of the day.

_**Brown-Eyed Blondies**_

Bella blushes and nibbles before yawning loudly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize how late it is," she says, standing up. "You have to work in like four hours. You're going to be dead on your feet."

"It's fine. I should get home though. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Same time. Same place." Bella smiles and walks him to the door.

The next day isn't terrible for Edward.

Sure, he's tired, but nothing can stop the pep in his step because of the progress he's made with Bella. That, and he can also thank Rosalie for her almost-deadly espresso. It's so strong Edward has to wait for it to cool and take it like a shot. He's had four.

He's practically vibrating when he gets home but is surprised when he sees a dark-skinned woman exit Bella's house, followed closely by her sister.

Both women look like they've been through hell.

And they have.

Alice all but falls into his arms, sobbing when he asks her what's going on.

"Major set back. I don't think she realized what day it was. It's bad, Edward. Zafrina had to sedate her."

"Why?" Edward pleads.

"Today is the two-year anniversary of her wedding day."

_What the hell?_


	13. The Hermit 13

**13**

**The Hermit**

Bella wakes up with a smile on her face.

She's proud of herself for taking the bold step and inviting Edward inside for dinner.

While apprehension clouded most of her day, Edward was patient and kind. They talked about the craziest things, and she laughed so much that her stomach muscles are still sore this morning.

Edward named another special after her.

The blondies were delicious but Bella never questioned that.

Nearly every night following the first time they shared a meal, he's brought home dessert from The Bakery, and she hasn't found something that isn't perfect.

Edward is a very talented baker, and Bella happily reaps the benefits.

She wants to call Alice and let her know about what transpired, but her sister has been especially busy at work lately. Instead, she decides to call her psychiatrist because last night is considered a big success.

She grabs a bowl of grapes, planning to park herself on the couch, so she can start watching a show Edward told her about. Her plan is to catch up to where he is so there will be plenty for them to talk about after dinner tonight.

It isn't until she picks up her phone and sees the date displayed on the lock screen that it happens.

Bella's phone falls out of her trembling hands, shattering into pieces followed by the bowl.

Panic starts its slow creep up her backbone, settling in the back of her neck. There isn't an inch of skin that isn't covered in goosebumps despite the anxious sweat seeping out of her pores.

Bella fights the dizzying fear and stumbles through the broken glass. She doesn't feel the pain of the shards as she steps on them. She doesn't notice the trail of blood she leaves along the carpet as she scrambles for her house phone.

Her vision blurs, and it feels like it takes hours to reach Zafrina's secretary.

Bella chokes out her information. "This is a nine-one-one emergency. Please." She hangs up and curls in on herself.

She's still on the floor where she collapsed when her sister stumbles through the door followed by her doctor.

Alice screams in horror when she sees all the blood. Thinking that her worst fears are becoming a reality. Zafrina exits the kitchen and tells her about the broken glass.

They work together to get Bella up onto the couch.

She's not crying, but the sounds coming from her are soft and heartbreaking.

Alice wipes the angry tears falling down her cheeks.

"I didn't even realize the date until you called," she cries. "I should have been here instead of at the office."

"We have a session booked for next week. I didn't know it held significance. That it was a trigger. She's been doing so well," Zafrina whispers and places a pillow underneath Bella's head.

They've doctored the many cuts on her feet and are scrubbing the carpet when she sits up with a pain-filled cry.

Alice moves carefully as she approaches her emotionally fragile sister.

"Bella, it's Alice. You're fine. You're safe."

Bella grabs her sister's hands, holding them in a vice-like grip.

"How could he do this to me, Ali?" she cries. "I thought he loved me."

Alice looks at Zafrina, silently begging her for help.

"Bella, I want you to calm down for me," the doctor says softly.

Bella doesn't recognize the woman standing in her living room.

"Who are you? Where is James?"

"James isn't coming, Bella," Alice says. "He left you on your wedding day. Remember?"

Bella sobs.

Suddenly, it comes crashing down on her, and she can remember it like it was yesterday.

"I thought he was different, but he was just like everyone else. Why does everyone hate me so much? What did I ever do to them?" she asks.

Zafrina sits on the couch and pries Alice's hands out of Bella's.

She knew Bella suffered trauma before she was referred to her office, but Bella would never touch the subject of her wedding day. She always managed to find a way to direct the conversation somewhere else.

She hopes this will give her some insight, so she's cautious in her attempt to pull information out of her patient.

"What did he do, Bella?"

Bella pulls her knees to her chest.

"I never knew he could be so cruel. I thought it was beautiful that he wanted to see me before the wedding. I never believed in those silly superstitions. I had just finished getting my makeup done and stepped into my dress when she came for me."

"Who came for you? The wedding planner?"

"No," Alice spats. "Victoria, Bella's bridesmaid."

Bella whimpers but continues. "Victoria came into the room. I didn't even realize she was gone. She must have slipped out when the makeup artist was working on me. She told me James was looking for me. She took me to meet him in the church's garden. He looked so handsome, but his smile was off. I remember thinking he was having second thoughts, but I was wrong."

Zafrina leaves the room and comes back with a can of soda, pressing it into Bella's shaky hands. She tells her to take a few sips, and then asks her to continue.

"James looked at my wedding dress that took me weeks to find and scowled. He told me that I looked fat. He never once made me feel self-conscious about my body, but he never touched me with the lights on, and never in public. I should have seen it coming, but I was blinded by what I thought was love."

Bella takes a deep breath and manages a few sips of her drink.

"No, Bella. No one saw it coming," Alice insists.

Tears streaming down Bella's face are left unchecked. She doesn't understand where they're coming from. Surely, she should have run out by now.

"Continue," Zafrina presses, careful not to touch the girl she fears Bella Swan might fall apart before her eyes if she does.

"He said that he couldn't take it anymore. That it never should have gone so far. I thought he was saying that he wasn't ready to get married. I told him we could wait. And then she stepped into his arms. They laughed. If I close my eyes, I can still hear Victoria's wicked laughter echoing off the garden walls. She told me that she couldn't believe he'd gone with it for so long. That I was a bet.

"A bunch of their friends made a bet before graduation that James couldn't get me to fall in love with him within a year. I fell right into their trap. I thought I was head over heels after only six months. He told me that it snowballed. That he never wanted it to go so far, but Victoria kept pushing. I thought she was my friend. It wasn't until I watched them drive away that I realized I didn't have any friends."

Zafrina makes a motion that they need to stop, but Bella is too far gone—the story continues spilling out of her.

"I started walking and didn't stop until I got home. You know, I never once questioned why James didn't want to move in with me until after the wedding. I locked the door and took a bath while I was still wearing my dress. And I decided that I would never put myself in that situation again. Ever again."

Everyone knows the rest of Bella's story. She hid away in her house and hasn't left since that fateful day. She refused to let anyone in, choosing to live half a life. But it's gone on for too long. Bella knows that. Both her sister and her psychiatrist know that.

"I've been trying so hard, Zafrina. I promise I have." She tries to stand but winces and falls back onto the couch. "I've let Edward in a little at a time, and he's so patient with me. We started having dinner at the threshold. Him sitting outside and me inside. But last night was a good night. I invited him in, and it was a lot of fun. We have plans to do it again tonight, but I can't."

"Can't what, Bella?"

"I can't look at him and not see James today. I won't be able to stop myself. He'll see me for what I am, and I'll ruin everything, and I don't want that to happen. Please, just give me something so I can sleep. I'm done with the day. Ali, can you just put a note on Edward's door telling him that I'm not feeling well. My cell phone is ruined or I'd text him."

Zafrina moves to her bag while Alice grabs a pen and paper.

Bella's hands are shaking so badly the words are barely legible.

They help Bella upstairs and her sister helps her get dressed for bed, kissing her forehead as Zafrina hands her two small pills.

"Thank you. Both of you. I'm so sorry."

"Never be sorry, Bella. You are a very strong woman, and when you wake up tomorrow, it will be a new day. You'll have dinner with Edward, and everything will go back to the way it was before. This is just a blip on the radar. If you wake up and need me, feel free to call my personal cell. I left the number right here on your nightstand," Zafrina tells her.

When they leave, Bella's body tries to fight the sedative but eventually loses the battle.

Instead of nightmares of cruel smiles and flaming red hair, her sleep is filled with dreams of green eyes that crinkle in the corners, the crooked smile that goes along with them, and the person who owns them.


	14. The Hunk 14

**14**

**The Hunk**

Bella's psychiatrist warned Edward to tread lightly for a few days before she left. To wait for Bella to contact him before he tried to get back to their routine. To move slowly and to be cautious. She pressed her card into his hand and told him to call her if anything felt off.

Alice also gave him her number so she could keep him updated on Bella.

The days that pass are the loneliest he's had since they started texting back and forth.

He's new to the area and devoted the majority of his time to getting The Bakery up and running. Aside from his sister and her husband, Bella is the only person he's had any real contact with. Edward has grown dependent on his beautiful neighbor whom he knows is hurting right now.

Hearing how she is via text messages from Alice does nothing to squash the worry. She contacts him a couple times a day to let him know that Bella is doing okay. That it's slow going, but she's okay.

If Edward never hears that word again, it will be too soon.

When he gets home from work one day, he sees a package sitting on Bella's stoop, and for a brief second, he thinks about snatching it.

Then he remembers Zafrina's instructions and goes inside.

Edward can't remember the last time he ate. He's standing at the stove, stirring some canned soup in a pot and telling himself that it won't taste like lead when his phone goes off.

Probably Rosalie. She's been bitching at him for days about his emo attitude. Bitching at him about everything is more like it.

Instead, it's a text message from an unknown number.

_Hey, Honey. It's Sugar. I had an accident with my phone, and I had to order another. For some reason, the company couldn't switch my old number over without me taking it to the store._

Edward's mouth hangs open.

And then his fingers are tapping away at the screen.

He knows he needs to be careful, so he decides to go the comical route.

**If you got the new iPhone before me I might have to disown you.**

_Really? What if I let you play with it while I finish dinner? Still disowned?_

Edward tosses the pot of soup into the sink and runs upstairs to change out of his sweats.

**Be over in five. I'll bring the Coke.**

_Enabler._

Edward stands at Bella's door with a twelve-pack of cola under one arm. He's afraid to admit that he's nervous about what he's going to find on the other side of the threshold. He gathers up the courage to knock.

He's surprised when a smiling Bella swings the door wide open.

She holds up her new phone and waves it in his face.

"I'll trade you my phone for what you've got, Honey."

They trade the phone for the cola.

"Hey, it's locked." He frowns at the empty space where she was once standing.

He watches her limp into the kitchen.

"I said you can play with it. I never said I would unlock it." She smiles over her shoulder at him.

He chokes on his tongue.

How is it possible for her to get more beautiful every time he sees her?

"Give me back my twelve-pack, Sugar. This is not fair."

He finds her standing in front of the oven, bent over and leaning in to grab what looks like a pan of enchiladas.

"Fuck, that looks good."

Bella drops the pan on the stove in surprise, and Edward realizes what he said.

"Sorry. Just. I have a skeleton in my closet." His cheeks burn. "I have a tiny bit of sailor's mouth. I blame Rosalie. She's a terrible big sister. She used to teach me bad words and tell me they meant something else. I told my mom that her dinner was fucktastic one time. I can still taste the soap she put in my mouth."

Bella smiles while he rambles.

"Edward, it's fine. I'm not a nun or anything. I say 'fuck' when the occasion arises," she assures him.

"I wasn't just talking about the food. You look gorgeous tonight."

It's Bella's turn to blush.

She's wearing another dress, blue and covered in green dots. Her feet are covered by her favorite technicolor socks. They go all the way up to her knees, leaving a small amount of skin between them and the hem of her dress. Her hair is braided down her back, but short strands are hanging down her face. Bella looks about as exhausted as Edward feels, but she's sporting a wide smile, and her dimples are present.

He's missed those dimples and the beautiful girl they belong to.

"Thanks. I like your shirt. I'm more of a Luke Combs fan than a Sam Hunt one, but it's cool."

"Blasphemous. Now unlock your phone for me, please."

"No. Can you carry this over to the table?" She points to the enchiladas. "I'll get some glasses."

He nods, pockets her phone, and does as she asks.

He's sitting at the table, chin resting in one hand just watching her.

"Are you okay, Sugar?"

She stiffens.

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you're limping."

"Oh, I dropped a bowl the other day and accidentally stepped on some glass when I went to get the broom," she lies.

He can tell she's not being truthful but doesn't say anything.

"Should you be walking?"

"Yep. My cuts are healing just fine. I'm wearing socks for padding," she tells him as she takes a seat. "I hope you're ready for vegetarian enchiladas."

Edward's mouth gapes.

"I'm kidding. You should see the look on your face." Bella giggles. "I promised, remember?"

"That was evil. I think you should definitely unlock your phone after we eat to make up for being so cruel."

"You just use me for my food and new technology." Bella snorts and covers her mouth in embarrassment.

She's so fucking cute.

"Definitely not. I genuinely enjoy your company. I've missed you lately."

Bella's dishing out the food when he says that, and her hand pauses but only for a second.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I had some really rough days, but I'm okay now."

She hands him a plate.

"You're sure you're okay?"

Bella nods.

"There's no need to apologize, Sugar. Bad days are part of life."

He wants to ask her about her setback. He wants to know about the story behind her wedding because it's obvious it played a major role in the reason why she is the way she is.

Edward is curious but who wouldn't be?

Instead of asking questions, he stuffs his face.

After his third helping, Bella stops him.

"Did you get high before you came over?"

"No, why?" He laughs.

"Because you're eating like you haven't had a meal in days."

Edward could tell her that he hasn't eaten in days. That he couldn't because his stomach was clenched with worry. Worry about her and the setback and where it was going to leave them.

Instead, he shrugs and explains that he didn't get a chance to eat today because Rosalie was being a mega bitch.

"She sounds like a hoot." Bella smiles, passing him her plate so he can finish her uneaten food.

"No offense to you or any other female in existence"—he puts his hands up defensively—"but when it's my sister's time of the month, everyone suffers, even the customers."

Bella laughs.

"Seriously, I've heard one of the regulars call it shark week. Today, she yelled at a guy for being a cheapskate when he dropped some loose change in the tip jar. I had to go out front and tell her to cut that shit out before she killed someone. We ended up calling one of the part-timers in, and I had her husband come pick her up."

"Oh, how is Emmett?"

He smiles because she remembers something as simple as his brother-in-law's name.

"He's all right. Managed to cut the tip of his thumb off at work. They weren't able to reattach it, but he's in good spirits."

"How does an accountant manage to cut a part of his body off? Never mind, it's Emmett you're talking about. That man needs to be bubble wrapped."

"Rosalie tried it. It was a joke, but he fell over and caught a garden hose nozzle with his forehead. Seven stitches later and Rosalie decided to take out a life insurance policy."

"That's smart."

Edward insists on doing the dishes since Bella cooked. It's only fair and a good excuse to get her off her feet.

"Honey, where's my phone?" she asks.

"Not telling until you give me the password."

Before he knows it, her hand is in his back pocket, plucking the phone out and laughing in his face.

Edward has never wanted to kiss someone so badly in his entire life.

"If I weren't elbow deep in this sink water, and we weren't in your kitchen, I'd tackle you," he threatens.

"Well, you are, and we are, so make sure you scrub that pan really well before putting it in the dishwasher." She gives him a wicked grin and takes her seat. "Meanwhile, I'll be over here, playing with my new phone."

"You are so evil. How have I not seen this side of you, Sugar?"

"I have many sides. Can't divulge all my secrets all at once, you know?"

Edward washes his hands and starts the dishwasher under Bella's instruction.

She's so engrossed in her phone that she doesn't see him walking toward her.

He snatches it out of her hands and holds it over his head.

"Ah-hah!" he exclaims.

"Noooo," Bella bellows, standing and reaching up on her tiptoes.

She's tall, so she can reach the phone, but Edward's fingers are stronger. They struggle until she gives up and walks to the living room, throwing herself on the couch with a huff.

Edward checks to see what had her attention.

"Sugar, why were you taking pictures of me doing the dishes?"

He looks over the back of the couch to find her lying there, hiding her bright red face, and smiles.

"Because," she answered, her words muffled by her hands.

"Because?"

"Yeah, just because." She sits up and pats the cushion beside her. "I've been watching _Santa Clarita Diet,_ so sit down because I have loads of questions."

"Ask away." He takes the seat beside her.

Their posture has changed a lot. The last time they were here, they sat on opposite ends of the couch.

But tonight, she's so close to him that he can feel her warmth through their clothes.

She smells like warm snickerdoodles. He knew she'd smell sweet.

"Okay, question one. Did you get the idea to toss your microwave out the back door because Joel threw his toaster oven out?"

"Bella, I wasn't lying when I said the blasted thing caught on fire." Edward laughs.

She turns on the show but continues to ask her silly questions.

It's a silly show, so it's to be expected.

At one point after Bella's explained the improbability of a situation happening, going into great detail, her hand lands on top of Edward's.

They both look down.

Edward decides to make a move and turns his hand over, letting his fingers rest against hers.

Bella is the one who chooses to braid their fingers together, and they go back to watching the show as if nothing happened.

"You do realize you just spent five minutes disproving a fact about a show where zombies throw up meatballs, right?" Edward asks, looking at her out of the corner of his eye, checking to make sure she isn't freaking out.

"Whatever. You just ruined my plans for dinner tomorrow night. I was going to make spaghetti and meatballs."

Bella, having taken her phone back, is swiping through it until she finds what she's looking for.

"Let's take a selfie."

"How old are we?"

"I'm twenty-one. How old are you?" she asks.

They've been talking for so long but never covered ages before.

"I'm fifty-seven. We Cullen men age gracefully," he jokes.

Bella doesn't look amused.

"Twenty-seven."

"You're ancient. We're still in the same century. Take a selfie with me."

Edward could never deny Bella anything.

They scooch closer together, and Bella holds out the phone.

"Smile, Honey," she says. "One-two-three. EDWARD, I SAID TO SMILE!"

"I smiled," he defends.

"You look like a serial killer. Redo."

Fourteen takes later, Bella finally deems the picture save-worthy.

"You might be twenty-seven but you sure can act like a four-year-old," she mutters, saving the photo as her lock screen and background.

She sends it to his phone when he asks.

"Bella, just because I'm not photogenic doesn't mean you have to be mean," Edward jokes.

She rolls her pretty eyes.

"And you tried to play the whole 'you can't reach' with my phone in the kitchen. You're immature."

"I'm also off tomorrow, so let's watch a couple more episodes, yeah?"

She nods and reaches out to grab his hand again.

He noticed the minuscule tremble she once had is gone.

Somehow, her head ends up resting on his shoulder.

"It's late. Are you getting tired?"

Bella shakes her head.

"I've been sleeping for days. I'm game if you want to continue."

Edward doesn't push, but he has so many questions batting around his head, just screaming to be asked.

"I know you're probably wondering what happened," Bella says softly as if she can read his mind. "I've never really talked about it until the other day, and I don't think I'm ready to do it all again so soon. I'm sorry."

Edward kisses the top of her head and squeezes her hand.

"I already told you that I'd wait, Sugar."

"Thank you."

He feels the wet spots her tears leave on his shirt but doesn't say anything.

Eventually, the spots dry, and they're back to laughing about something happening on-screen.

Today is a great day.


	15. The Hermit 15

**15**

**The Hermit**

"How are things going for you, Bella?" Zafrina asks, her pen tapping on her binder as usual.

Instead of counting the taps, Bella finds herself smiling so wide that her face hurts.

"Things are going really well. I think finally talking about James kind of released the hold the memories have had on me. I feel like I can breathe easier now. Does that make sense?"

"Yes. There's a reason you're seeing me. It's so we can talk about the difficult things and find a way to overcome them." Zafrina gives Bella a careful glance. "Can I ask what has you smiling so much? Don't get me wrong, I love it, but I'm curious."

"Honey-Edward. Edward has me smiling all the time. He's a great guy. I guess I could call him my best friend, seeing as he's my only friend. Alice and Jasper are family, so they don't really count."

"I was hoping you wouldn't withdrawal from Edward after what happened, but I'm glad the two of you seem to be moving along. Have you told him anything about your past?"

"No. Not yet. One of the great things about Edward is that he doesn't push, and he has the patience of a saint. I know he has questions, and I'll have to tell him someday. I need some time to adjust first," Bella admits.

"That's fine. You shouldn't do something just because you think you have to. Take your time and don't overwhelm yourself just to make someone else happy. You and Edward have gone back to your dinner nights. Are they back at the threshold or at your table?"

"At the table. Well, the other night we got pizza and just vegged out on the couch." Bella grins, remembering when Edward pulled her feet onto his lap and how she just let him. "He gets me to watch the dumbest stuff. He has terrible taste in entertainment. Movies, shows, music."

"Do the two of you touch?"

Bella blushes and stumbles through the progress they've made since the night they first held hands.

"He initiated the contact by pulling your feet onto his lap?"

"Yes. But it was okay. I didn't even anticipate a reaction. Being around Edward is easy." Bella pushes her long bangs out of her eyes. "Before you ask if I'm paranoid about the other shoe dropping, the thoughts still linger. But when I feel that way, it's like he knows, and I get a sweet text message or a silly picture. I taught him how to take selfies, and he is constantly sending me them now. I've created a monster."

Zafrina checks her watch and closes her binder.

"I am so happy to see you smile, Bella. I'm also happy with the progress you're making. So I'm going to ask you a very serious question."

"Shoot."

"Would you like to see me in two weeks, one month, or three months from now? Remember that at any time, you can call the emergency number, and I'll fit you in immediately."

Bella contemplates for a second.

"Let's go with three months. I hope that by then, I can make you proud."

The woman laughs.

"I am proud of you, Bella. Now let's talk homework."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Bella is standing at her front windows, watching and waiting.

She hasn't pulled the curtains back since she pulled them shut two years ago, but here she is, glancing through the blinds like some kind of peeping Tom.

Today was a great day.

Her meeting with Zafrina went well, and she was able to say James' name without so much as a second thought.

Her psychiatrist left Bella with more homework.

Technically, she has time to complete it, but she's got this feeling deep in her bones that today should be the day.

She sees the familiar gunmetal-colored SUV pull up in front of the townhouses, smiling when she sees that Edward is still taking up both of their parking spaces just to piss off a neighbor a couple houses down. The guy almost beat down Edward's door while they were having lunch together one afternoon, and Bella watched from the shadows as they bickered.

"You're blocking the fucking spot. What makes you think you're so special that you need two?" the guy asked, red-faced and livid.

Edward squared his shoulders, blocking her view.

"Well, seeing as one spot is mine and the other is my girl's, I think that entitles me to park however the fuck I want to. Get the hell off my lawn, prick."

Edward slammed the door.

Bella clenched her fists so tightly her nails drew blood to keep from jumping into his arms and kissing the hell out of him.

It was so hot.

It left her hot and bothered.

She finds herself wanting to kiss him senseless all the time but doesn't give in because she isn't sure she's ready for a relationship. Kissing still leads to relationships, right?

Bella doesn't want to ruin things with Edward or pressure him into something just to make her happy. He calls her his girl when he isn't calling her Sugar, but he's an affectionate man. He could still only want her as a friend.

Her agoraphobia would make everything difficult anyway.

She's so lost in thought that she doesn't notice Edward rummaging for something in the backseat of his car.

She comes back to the present when he's walking up the pathway.

Bella takes a deep breath and opens her door before he makes his way to his.

He greets her with a big smile and holds up a familiar yellow box from The Bakery.

His smile grows even wider and the box drops to the ground as Bella steps out on her front porch for the first time in two years.

Two years and a couple of weeks, if she's being honest.

"Sugar?" Edward says hesitantly.

"I saw Zafrina today. She gave me homework. I'm sort of freaking out."

He rushes up her stairs and pulls her trembling body into his arms, squeezing her impossibly tight.

"I'm so damn proud of you."

There's something about the way he's looking at her, the way she feels in his embrace, that makes Bella forget their entire situation. Her eyes dart to his lips, and they're just begging for hers.

There isn't any hesitation or waver in her movements. She leans up until they are eye to eye, nose to nose and mouth-to-mouth.

Edward's green eyes take in her brown ones, trying to gauge her.

"Stay still," she tells him.

He nods.

"Don't move." Her lip quivers. But she can't help herself. She just has to. Even if it's just this once. Bella leans in and brushes her lips against Edward's so softly she doubts he can even feel it. But she does, and it makes her brave. She presses a little harder, and his hold on her tightens.

She's not freaking out that she's standing outside of her home, her sanctuary. Bella isn't freaking out that she's in the arms of a man and kissing him. She's definitely not freaking out when he starts kissing her back.

Edward grips her tightly until her feet leave the ground, and he carries her into the house. Their lips never separate, and the kiss doesn't deepen, but it's everything she let herself imagine it would be, maybe even better. His foot slams her door shut, and he takes her straight to the couch.

Bella's wearing a dress, and ever the gentleman, Edward sits down with her across his lap.

She doesn't worry that she's too heavy. That she's crushing his legs. She's too busy trying to memorize every single moment of this just in case it ends up being just a one time thing. Bella's arms wrap around Edward's shoulders, holding onto him like he's going to disappear if she doesn't.

His hands find their way into her hair.

They share short, panting breaths but don't stop.

That is until the timer goes off, and Bella turns her head toward the kitchen, abruptly ending their kiss. Still, Edward's lips brush across her cheek, never leaving her skin.

"That's dinner."

He's just staring at her with the kind of look that makes her want to melt into a puddle.

He hasn't pulled his fingers out of her hair, and she hasn't let go of her hold on him.

"I think it can wait five minutes," he murmurs.

"Maybe ten. Fifteen would be pushing it—"

His lips are back on hers, and she gasps when his tongue swipes across her bottom lip, all but begging for access.

Bella hesitates for a moment. She wasn't planning on this. Did she brush her teeth? Fuck it. She could never deny Edward anything.

His tongue is just as gentle as he's always been with her. Sweet and patient.

Can he tell that she has almost no experience in this department?

She swallows the paranoia slowly creeping in but finds herself relieved when he pulls away to breathe.

"Go check on dinner. I'm going to get dessert off your lawn and get out of these clothes."

His jacket is covered in flour and chocolate.

Bella looks down and her pretty black dress suffered the same fate.

"Yeah. I guess I should change too."

"Sorry. Hazards of the job."

She shrugs because it was more than worth it.

They separate and stand, but Edward pulls her in for another hug before he leaves.

"Don't go upstairs and obsess over this, okay."

"Okay. I'll see you in a few. Just leave the door unlocked and come right in."

She checks the meatloaf and decides that she has enough time to change.

She decides to pull on the sweater dress she made and rolls up the sleeves, fastening them with the buttons she added ages ago.

She bounces down the stairs, greeting Edward with a peck on his lips as he walks through the door at the same time.

Before she can head for the kitchen, he grabs her arm and pulls her into his arms.

"I really like this greeting," he tells her. "I'm so fucking proud of you, Sugar."

"I tried not to overthink it, to be honest. Zafrina left, and I kind of just wanted to do it then so she could see it, but I wanted it to be special. You're special to me so …" Her cheeks darken.

"You're special to me too. I'm so glad you waited for me to get home." He presents her with a slightly crushed box.

"What is it?"

"Open it," Edward says.

Bella opens the box, glaring at him when she sees what's inside the box. "I thought we agreed that my cookies wouldn't be baked for profit."

"They weren't. I promise. I mean the cookies were the special of the day. I let Rosalie name them because I wanted to make these special for you."

"And what did Rosalie name them?"

"Crack a nut, macadamia cookies. She tried to draw a picture of a set of nutcrackers, but somehow, it ended up looking like a dick."

Bella laughs.

"Pics or it didn't happen."

Edward pulls his phone out, making a big show that he finally upgraded. She rolls her eyes and takes a look at the picture he pulls up.

"Tell me you didn't let her put that in the storefront."

"I could"—he shows her another picture—"but that would be a lie. I couldn't resist. My sister is a lot of things, but an artist is not one of them. I sent a picture of it to my mom and told her that Rosalie was selling dick-shaped cookies. I could hear her yelling through the phone over the industrial ovens."

"And you say I'm evil. Your poor mom. She gave birth to two, wicked children."

"Three. I'm a twin."

Bella's eyes widen in surprise. "Really?"

"Yup. He was just here. Drove my car home for me and brought the cookies up. How did they end up on the lawn?"

Bella punches him in the arm when she realizes he's playing with her.

"You're a dick. Rosalie should have drawn you on the chalkboard." She stomps to the kitchen.

"Oh, come on, Sugar. I can't help that you're so naïve."

The words might as well be a bucket of ice water being poured over her head.

Edward watches her steps falter.

"Bella ..." He approaches her, but she throws her arms up defensively.

"Just give me a second."

He's quiet, watching her.

She's trying to go through the breathing techniques she's been taught. They've never worked before, but she really doesn't want to unravel in front of Edward.

Is this the other shoe she was just talking about with Zafrina?

Edward tries to approach again, slowly and cautiously.

She lets him get close and allows him to take her hand.

He places it against his chest and takes a deep breath.

"Breathe with me, Sugar."

Bella breathes in time with him until she can finally fill her lungs with air.

"Okay?" Edward asks, not letting go of her hand. "I hurt you. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I've been told that a time or two before, and it just got to me." Her eyes water. "Can I have a minute?"

"Of course. Take your time."

When she makes it upstairs, Bella washes her face and stares at her reflection.

One little word and it feels like her entire day is ruined.

Naïve.

The girls in junior high used to call her that when she fell for the invitations to sleepovers and birthday parties. She showed up every time and was left humiliated every time they laughed and slammed the door in her face. They called her naïve when she fell for their trick at the dance.

She fell for the cruel pranks and jokes at her expense all throughout high school, just wanting to fit in.

"Fat, naïve Bella," they'd call her.

Worst of all, though, was James and Victoria, laughing about how naïve she was before they drove off in the limo she'd paid for. That little word played a big part in destroying her life. She never thought it would be a trigger though. She's never found herself in this situation before.

STOP!

Bella decides right then and there that the past is the past. She's done letting regrets affect her life. Because right now, it's pretty damn great. Edward didn't mean anything but a little ribbing. He couldn't have known the power behind that little word and would never do anything to hurt her. He promises that all the time.

She dries her eyes and puts an honest smile on her face before joining him in the kitchen.

She finds him pacing back and forth, pulling at his hair.

"Honey, I'm fine. Stop abusing your hair. I like it on top of your head." She steps into his embrace and kisses him on the mouth.

"I'm so sorry."

"Don't be. You couldn't have known. I'm okay. I'm going to try really hard to stop letting my past rule my life. Now, let's eat, and then we can watch whatever terrible movie you pick out. Okay?"

"Okay."


	16. The Hunk 16

**16**

**The Hunk**

Time moves quickly for Edward and Bella.

Seasons change, and Bella makes slow but steady progress.

He almost teared up when she made it to the bottom stair of the small porch they share to greet him with a kiss one afternoon after work.

With the good days, which there were a lot, there were also bad days for Bella.

One night, Edward got a text message. Bella told him she couldn't sleep because she was having nightmares. He offered to come over, and she met him at the door, five feet from the entryway.

Edward's heart sank.

They'd been doing so well.

He held her on the couch for hours as she slept fitfully.

She talked a lot as she dreamed, and Edward felt guilty because he found out things that night that he knew Bella wasn't ready to share yet.

She talked about a man named James and how he broke her. She mentioned a woman named Victoria in the same breath.

It wasn't in great detail, but he wanted to kill them for doing whatever they did to make her hurt so much.

She cried and clutched Edward closely. And then Bella calmed down a little and spoke of green eyes and a handsome smile.

Regretfully, Edward had to wake her up so he could go to work, not wanting to leave without saying goodbye. Sometimes, he hated that he didn't want anyone else in his kitchen. Because that night, he knew Bella needed him.

It killed him to leave her.

She nodded and burrowed into the couch, denying his attempt to kiss her before he left.

Zafrina's card burned a hole in his wallet the entire day, but he wanted to see how Bella was when he got off work.

He got home, and she wasn't there to greet him from her stoop.

Bella spent days upset with herself for letting her past get to her again. She'd made a promise to herself, and she felt like she let everyone down.

It took Edward days to convince her that everyone has moments of vulnerability. It's just part of being human. That bad days are to be expected.

It took a week before Bella met him out on the stairs again and another two weeks before they were back to how affectionate they were before the setback.

Things have settled, and it's almost as if nothing ever happened.

Thanksgiving is approaching when Bella broaches the subject.

"Hey, Honey. What are you planning to do for Turkey Day?" she asks one night while Edward attempts to teach her how to make a souffle. It's going about as well as the chopstick lesson went all those months ago.

He pulls out another dish, watches the middle collapse, and sighs.

Bella frowns.

"I have a box of instant pudding. I think souffle might not be my forte."

"Rose and I talked it over, and we'd rather keep The Bakery open all week except for Thanksgiving Day because there's so much profit to be made. We're going to make a shit ton of pies and maybe some cookies, well, I'm going to bake everything. Traveling to visit our parents would be pointless for just one day, and Dad works a lot, so they can't come to us at such short notice. Emmett wants to deep fry a turkey, and I'm not going to be anywhere near that disaster waiting to happen, so I figured I'd stay home and pretend to watch football."

She turns to him with a surprised look on her face. "Absolutely not. I always have Alice and Jasper over for the day. Jasper hates football, so he brings a bunch of bootleg movies, and I make way too much food while Alice 'helps' by sitting at the table."

"Alice doesn't cook?"

"No. Alice burns water and turns Nestle Toll House premade cookie dough into charcoal briquettes." Bella snorts. "Please come over. I would love to have some help. You shouldn't be all alone."

"I'd love to come help you, Sugar. Just let me know what I can bring."

"Alice goes shopping for everything, so if there's something special you need, just put it on the list." She points to the fridge. "Considering how much work that goes into the meal, the least she and Jasper can do is fight with the crowds at the grocery store."

"That makes sense."

Edward moves over to the fridge, and his eyes widen at the rather extensive list Bella has made. He glances through the items and adds a couple of things at the bottom.

"Whatcha gonna make?" Bella asks.

"I like to make stuffing from scratch. I need a loaf of stale bread and celery."

They settle on the couch with a mixing bowl of instant chocolate pudding and two spoons.

They talk about the holiday and the probability of Edward's brother-in-law ending up in the hospital's burn unit. Bella offers to invite them over, but he can tell she's uncomfortable with the idea of having two new strangers in her house.

Baby steps.

"No. They want to spend it together, just the two of them. I think they're trying to make me an uncle."

"Emmett can still have kids? From all the accidents he's had, I would think he injured his ... you know." Bella blushes, pointing to her lap with her spoon.

"I never really thought about that. I know my sister wants a baby, and what Rosalie wants, Rosalie gets. If that's the case, she'll probably do the whole turkey baster thing."

Pudding sprays out of Bella's mouth all over them, the couch, the carpet, and the coffee table. She covers her face, laughing so hard the bowl on her lap nearly falls onto the floor.

Edward catches it, setting it on the table.

Bella is still cackling, and he loves seeing her so happy.

He knows he's falling in love with her. He's willing to go as slow as she needs because Bella is more than worth it.

Edward knows it's too soon. He'd hate to push her, and he needs to make sure his feelings are absolute before he tells her. It would kill him to bring her pain if he isn't completely sure.

Instead of declaring his possible love for her, he looks down at his clothes and glares at her.

"I can't believe you just projectile spat chocolate pudding all over me."

"I'm sorry." Bella snorts behind her hands.

"No, you aren't."

He's about to tell her that he's going to his house so he can change when Bella surprises him by climbing onto his lap.

"I am sorry." Her face is bright red, from laughing or from embarrassment, Edward can't tell.

Her knees are blocking him in, so he wraps his sticky arms around her middle, bringing her in close for a steamy kiss. He knows she's comfortable with him initiating a little. Luckily, kissing is one of the areas Bella is okay with handing over the reins.

He loves the feel of her mouth against his, and being able to do it anytime he wants is just icing on the cake.

She's so reactive to him, and it's slowly driving Edward insane.

Sure, he wants Bella sexually. Any grown man with eyes would want that. But he's scared that one day he'll push a little too far, and he'll lose her forever. Instead, he's always a step or two behind Bella. Always letting her take the lead.

When they break apart, Bella has chocolate smeared all over her face. Edward leans up and licks her top lip.

A laughing Bella decides that they should both get cleaned up and that she needs to grab the spot cleaner for the carpet.

Edward is still laughing when he returns, clean and changed into a pair of sweats.

Bella asks him to push the couch back so they won't step on the wet spot left by the cleaner.

The rest of the pudding is packed away in the fridge for another day, and they're cuddled underneath a thick blanket that Bella made last year. She decides to pick out the movie this time because Edward has terrible taste, according to her anyway.

She goes with a romantic comedy that neither of them watches because their mouths are glued together before the beginning credits finish rolling.

Bella tells him all the time that she's never been happier than she is right now.

Edward's starting to realize that he feels the same way. He's been living half a life before he met her. With Bella, he feels complete. He's almost completely sure that he's in love.

When they separate for the night, it's understood that the next couple of weeks are going to be rough and that he'll be prepping for the holiday ahead.

Bella tells him that she'll always have dinner waiting for him and that she doesn't want him to bring home any desserts.

"Too much temptation. I'll eat a bunch of sweets on Thanksgiving, and I don't want to go too crazy." She grabs her soft stomach.

"You're perfect, Sugar. I like you just the way you are."

She smiles, but he can tell it's not genuine. He's been trying to work on her self-esteem, but like everything else with Bella, it takes time. They say goodnight, and Edward prepares for the next couple of weeks, hoping he'll be able to find time to spend with Bella.

Preparing for Thanksgiving is hell. With Rosalie running the front counter during business hours and then bitching and riding his ass about everything he does in the kitchen after they close. Edward manages to persevere but everything comes to a head the night before they close the shop. He gives up and calls his mom. Sure, it's pathetic, but he's ready to shove Rosalie into the walk-in freezer and lock the door.

Instead of being supportive and promising to talk to her annoying-as-shit daughter, his mom starts interrogating him about Bella. "_Sweetheart, if we'd known you were seeing someone, we would have tried harder to come out there."_

Edward rolls his eyes and pushes his sister out-of-the-way so he can check on a batch of muffins and sighs.

"It's different with Bella, Ma. It would overwhelm her if you and Dad just showed up. She isn't ready for something like that."

"_But Rosalie told me that you've been seeing her for months now. Why would you keep this from me?"_ Edward can hear the pain in her voice.

He slaps Rosalie—who's eating leftover brownie batter—in the back of the head and flips her the bird.

"Mom, Bella is agoraphobic and has severe social anxiety. She can't leave her house. She has panic attacks, but we're working on it. It's just a slow process. Really slow."

"_Oh, sweetheart. You must really like her if you're willing to go through all of this work."_

Edward smiles. "She's really special. I promise as soon as she's up for it, we'll arrange something. I want you and Dad to meet her because I don't have any plans to let her go."

"Gag me with a fucking spoon." Rosalie groans, using her spoon to gag herself.

"_I can't wait. I know you're busy, but I want to hear more about her later. I need to know what to get her for Christmas."_

Edward pinches the bridge of his nose. "I'll call you later. Now can you please do something about your daughter before I do something drastic, and you have to come visit me in the pen?" He hands the phone over to his sister and gets back to work.

If anything, the call only makes Rosalie's attitude worse.

"Do I need to go buy you tampons or something?" he asks, burning himself on a pan of cookies. "Shit!"

"No. I'll have you know, I'm late. Only a couple of days, so we're trying not to get our hopes up," Rosalie almost whispers.

Edward stops short; he can't remember the last time he's seen his big sister vulnerable.

"Sup, Ro?" he asks, running water over his burn.

"We thought we made a baby a couple of months ago. The test came back positive, but we got a call from the doctor, and it turned out to be a chemical pregnancy. So we're not taking store-bought tests. We're going to wait and go to the doctor."

"That's great, Rosalie," he tells her. "I can't wait to be an uncle."

He'd hug her if they were like that; instead, he punches her lightly in the arm and walks over to the first-aid kit.

"Really?" she asks, swinging her legs back and forth.

"Yeah, I'm going to make it my mission to teach the little shit his first word. Fucktastic."

Rosalie throws the mixing bowl at his head and stomps out of the kitchen, yelling at him to clean up the mess.

Edward's dead on his feet by the time he makes it home.

He called Bella on his way to let her know, and she's there waiting for him when he walks up the pathway.

"What's up, Honey?" She hands him a covered dish and kisses him on the cheek.

Edward yawns.

"I might be an uncle. And I think I found something worse than shark week. Rosalie is a raging bitch. Raging," he stresses. "If she is pregnant, I might have to look for another job."

"I'm sorry." She smiles, running her thumb over the dark circle underneath his eye.

"It's okay. Just gotta make it through tomorrow."

"You're still getting off at noon?"

He nods.

"Rose wants to make sure everything I've been making sells before we close for an entire day. I told her I was leaving at twelve and not to call me at all on Thanksgiving. We aren't sentimental or anything, so it's not like we wish each other happy holiday, aside from Christmas." He yawns again.

"Go eat and get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

He kisses her softly before stepping over the fencing and entering his house.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Bella gave Edward a key ages ago, but she tends to leave her door unlocked when she's expecting him. It's a big deal, her leaving her door unlocked. She's spent so much time locking the world out.

He's confused when he finds the door locked on Thanksgiving morning. She told him to come over early so they could start cooking.

He pulls his key out and enters the house. It already smells like turkey. Bella's probably been up for hours.

"Hey, Sugar! Why's the door locked?" he asks, rounding the corner and stopping short.

Bella's standing at the stove, and her sister is sitting on the sink watching her mix something.

"Yeah, I forgot to ask you about that." Alice giggles. "Sugar?"

"It's my nickname," Bella explains. "Jasper probably locked it when they got here. Old habits die hard. Did you get enough sleep, Honey?"

"Honey? Seriously, you guys are so dang cute." Alice cackles.

Edward gauges Bella, silently asking if it's okay for him to kiss her.

She answers him by throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him senseless.

It's been a long five days.

They pull apart when her sister starts whistling and catcalling.

"I got plenty of sleep. Now, put me to work."

Bella tells him that he can start his stuffing while she works on the gravy. Alice moves to the table and watches them work side by side like they've been doing it for years. They have been doing it for a while now, but Bella and Edward have always worked well together. Some things are so easy for them.

Alice has never seen Bella so happy as she and Edward work. They have their inside jokes, and he knows where everything is in her kitchen. She can't recall the last time Bella called her in a panic, needing her help. Edward is so good to her sister.

Edward's chopping celery, and Bella's asking him to taste the gravy, when a buzz-cut man enters the room.

"Bella, your door was unlocked … Oh, hello. You must be Edward."

Edward waves the knife, apologizing that he can't shake the man's hand properly. "It's nice to meet you, Jasper. Bella talks about you and Alice a lot."

"I bet she talks more about you to us."

Bella's face flushes.

"All good things, I hope." Edward laughs, hip bumping her. "It's all right, Sugar. I talk about you a lot too.

"The door?" Jasper asks, popping the little bubble they find themselves in so often.

"Yeah, I leave it unlocked when Edward's coming over. But he has a key, so he just came in."

Alice's jaw is practically on the floor. She has got to get her sister alone at some point today for a major interrogation.

Hours later, Jasper has rearranged all the furniture in the living room so they can eat while they watch the movies he brought.

Everyone works together to bring everything to the table, and Edward's surprised when the couple across from him clasps their hands together, praying over the meal.

He notices Bella is just waiting as if this is nothing new. She catches him staring. "Later," she mouths.

When Alice and Jasper say "amen", everyone starts reaching for dishes.

"Edward, can you come help me get everyone something to drink? It looks like we forgot."

He nods and follows her to the kitchen.

"My sister and I were raised Catholic. I hope they didn't make you uncomfortable."

"Of course not, Bella. Some people practice religion and some people don't."

"I don't. I'm not an atheist or anything. I don't blame a god when bad things happen, and I don't thank a god when good things happen."

"Same, so no worries. Why was that such a big deal?"

"I just wanted to let you know, but I also wanted to get you alone for a second," she says, giving him a smacking kiss on the lips. "I also wanted to warn you that Jasper buys his bootleg movies from some guy's trunk at a flea market they frequent. The quality is going to be as bad as your taste in music."

Edward chuckles.

"Not a big deal, Sugar. Come eat before everything gets cold."

"Hey, I have a working microwave, punk."

Without thinking, Edward reaches out and smacks her lightly on the ass. Bella gives a squeak of surprise before turning around.

"Bella, I'm so sorry—"

The next thing he knows, he's being pushed up against the fridge with so much force the contents inside shake and rattle.

Bella all but shoves her tongue down his throat.

When she pulls away, gasping for air, she tells him that he needs to stop walking on eggshells all the time and exits the kitchen with a happy little giggle.


	17. The Hermit 17

**Try to take it easy on Bella. She's pretty much going in blindly **

**17**

**The Hermit**

It turns out the only movie Jasper bought that wasn't dubbed in Spanish is an action flick, so after dinner, Bella and Alice decide to clean up while the boys watch.

"I tried to tell him that dude was selling bad DVDs, but he never learns." Alice laughs, filling the sink with soapy water.

Bella is working on putting things in Tupperware and splitting it up so her sister can take plenty of leftovers home. Jasper will be grateful.

"He tries, Ali."

"Speaking of trying, Sugar." Alice turns off the water and leans against the sink, giving her sister an interrogating gaze.

"It's just a nickname. He gave it to me when we first started texting because we both enjoy baking," Bella explains, not meeting her gaze. "And to be fair, I call him Honey because he's sweet."

"That kiss 'hello' was anything but sweet. What the heck was that, Bella? Seriously, it was hot. Like steam the windows hot."

"There isn't much to tell. We like to kiss. I don't have to explain anything to you. That's what I pay Zafrina for."

"I'm your sister, and up until this guy moved in next door, I was the only kind of friend you had for years. So, you do owe me something." Alice's eyes narrow. "Are you together?"

"I don't think so. I'm not a prime candidate for dating material, am I? I can't leave my house except for a couple of steps, and I'm still unstable. Edward isn't the magic cure, and I've had plenty of bad days. We're just friends."

"Bella, we're talking about the guy who ate dinner with you on your stoop for weeks. He names baked goods after you and looks at you like you hang the moon. How can that not be a relationship?"

Bella shrugs and holds up a pan of green bean casserole. She knows Jasper doesn't like it but her sister does.

Alice shakes her head.

"You know what I think?"

"Not really, but I feel like you're going to tell me anyway."

"The two of you are something special. I've never seen it before. The way you move ... you orient yourself around him without even thinking about it. When he moves, you adjust your position at the same time. Like magnets or gravity. You're like a satellite or something," Alice explains.

"Don't be ridiculous, Ali."

"I'm serious, Bella. I think the two of you are destined for greatness. Jasper and I are always praying for you. I think it's finally starting to pay off."

Not wanting to start a fight on what has been a very good day, Bella remains silent.

"If the past few months haven't convinced you that you're in a relationship with that really great guy sitting in your living room, I think you're being dumb." Alice's eyes water. "You haven't called me for help in ages because you have him. I'm so proud of what you've accomplished thanks to Edward. Tell me why you think you're just friends."

Bella closes the refrigerator and turns to her sister, leaning against the cold metal she'd had Edward pressed up against earlier.

She smiles.

"I think I really want everything he's willing to give me. I've never felt this way before. My heart hurts when he leaves, and my body aches when he smiles at me. My lips tingle at just the thought of kissing him. He touches me like I'm made of hand-blown glass, well, except for earlier."

Alice's eyes widen. "I heard a bang. What happened?"

"He swatted me on the butt, and it was like I was another person or something. I pushed him up against the fridge and attacked him."

"I still don't get it. Why don't you think this is a romantic relationship again?"

Bella's smile falls, and she starts wringing her hands. She hasn't rubbed to the point of blisters in so long and hates that she can feel a sore spot forming.

"Because I can't leave my house, Ali. What do I have to offer him? He says he'll wait, but what if that day never comes? What if I'm stuck in these four walls for the rest of my life? I can't condemn someone to this life just because I don't want to be alone." Bella wipes her tear-filled eyes. "I would give him up before I'd ask that of him."

"The hell you will," Edward says from the doorway.

Both girls jump in surprise.

He pushes past Alice and pulls Bella into his arms.

"I told you I'm not going anywhere. I'll tell you every single day forever if I have to until you believe me."

Edward takes her face in his hands.

"You give me plenty by just being you, Bella. If you want to stay in these four walls for the rest of your life then I'll gladly come home to you every night. But I believe in you, Sugar. You are so much stronger than this, and I'll be with you every step of the way."

He kisses her tear-stained lips and pulls back.

"Please don't ever talk about giving me up because just the thought of you sending me away is killing me."

Alice watches her sister, waiting for her to calm down before grabbing the bag of leftovers off the stove.

"We're going to head out. You two have some stuff to talk about. Call me, Bells."

Bella merely nods against Edward's shoulder. She's upset that he heard her conversation. She's embarrassed that she can't stop crying. She's so tired of crying.

Edward just holds her, whispering that he's not going anywhere and pleading with her to believe him.

When Bella finally calms down, she pulls out from his embrace and his arms fall to his sides.

"I'm going to go upstairs and wash my face. Just don't go."

"I'll be right here, Sugar."

She starts to leave the kitchen but feels panic slowly creeping it's way up her backbone. Her steps falter. When she turns around and sees Edward, it's like magic how fast the feeling melts away.

He gives her a cautious smile.

"Um, can you come upstairs with me?" she asks in a small voice.

"Yeah."

He follows her up the stairs.

Bella washes her face and avoids looking at her reflection. She knows she'll see shame in her eyes, and she can't handle that right now. Instead, she washes her face, careful not to let Edward out of her sight. When a gust of wind from the small window pushes the door shut, Bella panics. Her face is covered in soap as she scrambles to open the door, failing miserably when her sudsy hands slip and slide off of the knob.

"Sugar, calm down," Edward calls through the door.

She finally steps back, and he opens it, barely having time to catch her.

Covered in soap and a fresh round of tears, Bella clings to Edward, whispering heartbreaking words over and over again. "Please don't leave me. Please don't leave me. Please don't leave me."

"Bella. Look at me," he says.

The soap burns her eyes, but she does as he asks.

"I am not going anywhere. You're so stuck with me it's not even funny." He wipes some soap off of her lips and kisses them softly.

"I want you to take one of your pills. And then I want you to take a shower or a bath, whatever it is that will help you calm down. I'll sit right outside this door and talk to you the entire time if you need me to."

He pulls the bottle out of the medicine cabinet, and Bella's head hangs in shame.

She hasn't needed one of them in so long that she's skipped a refill. She's been so proud of that fact. And now this.

"This doesn't make you weak, Sugar," Edward says, handing her a pill and a cup of water.

She takes it. It's not an instant relief but knowing that it's coming helps her go through the motions.

Bella turns the water on, gathers some pajamas and a fresh towel. She gives Edward one last look before she slides the door shut and stands there. Waiting for the panic. She's so embarrassed. She's a basketcase. If he walked away from her right now, she wouldn't blame him.

"I'm really sorry, Sugar. I hate that you didn't realize I was interested in being with you as more than a friend. But, baby. I've considered you mine since the night you agreed to eat dinner with me on the porch. I just didn't want to scare you."

Bella blows her nose and steps under the warm spray.

"I guess that means I have a lot of time to make up for. When I get off work tomorrow, we're going to have our first official date," Edward says through the door.

She doesn't say anything.

"We're obviously going to be inside, but it's chilly out, so I want you to wear that pretty dress you made because it's my favorite. I like you barefoot because I like to see what color your toes are painted, but if you want, you can pull out those fuzzy rainbow socks—I like those too."

Bella smiles as she shampoos her hair.

"I'm gonna show up with a bottle of Coke. I'm not going to tell you what kind it is because I want it to be a surprise. I'm going to have take-out because you will never cook on our date nights."

She's rubbing conditioner into her strands, and her smile grows.

"We'll light some of those fancy candles that are going to waste in your junk drawer and enjoy dinner before we pull up your 'Sappy Shit' playlist on your phone."

Bella's face flushes. She was so embarrassed when he found the names of her playlists. But then he showed her his list, and it made everything better. While she has names like "Smexy Songs" and "Christmas Crap", Edward's lists start with the phrase "the one with that one song that …"'. She almost laughs as she washes her body, in a hurry to see his face again.

"I don't really know how to dance. My mom tried to teach me the basics one time when she thought I was going to prom. Instead of going, I went and hung out at a burger joint with some friends. Somehow soda got spilled all over my beat-up Saturn, so I spent the rest of my night at one of those do-it-yourself car washes. It was awesome, obviously."

Bella wants to tell him that she was invited to the prom her senior year but Alice overheard her supposed date talking about how he was taking the head cheerleader. Bella stayed home and cried while her sister attended the dance, and her parents avoided her bedroom.

Instead, she steps out of the shower, feeling refreshed and dries off.

"Anyway, back to our date. We're going to stumble through some of your songs, and then we're going to sit on your couch and watch a movie that I let you pick out. I'd prefer it if you chose a scary one, so I can hold you extra tight."

Bella's getting dressed when she hears his head hit the door.

"Ow, so yep. I'm gonna knock your socks off. That is if you decide to go with those fuzzy socks that I love. If not, I'm still gonna kiss the heck out of you. A lot. I'm talking, the next day we're both going to look bee stung."

She wants him to kiss her like that right now. But Alice was right. They do need to talk. She smiles as she runs a brush through her hair and pulls it into a messy bun. Bella wipes the condensation off the mirror and takes a good look at herself. Her eyes are bloodshot and swollen. She uses some drops and rests against the counter, listening to him plan their first date.

"I'm going to finish the night by walking you to your door. And I'll kiss you one time, chastely, because it's the end of our first date after all. I'll go home and climb into bed and send you a selfie that'll make you smile. I'll ask you what you're doing the next night. You'll tell me that you're free. I'll ask you what you're doing the day after that, and you'll answer the same way. We'll go back and forth until you yell at me about how late it is and that I have to work the next day."

Bella opens the door, laughing a deep belly laugh when Edward falls onto his back at her feet.

"I didn't think this part through."

"You're a dork." She offers him a hand, and he doesn't let go of it once he's standing.

"Tell me we're okay, Sugar."

"Honey, I think our first official date sounds pretty great. I don't know how you'll top it, but I'm sure you'll find a way."

"You didn't answer my question."

"I'm just dealing with some insecurity right now. I'm sorry about earlier. I just have these moments where my past comes back to haunt me no matter how hard I try to fight it. I'm embarrassed about how I reacted." She checks the time. "Do you think maybe we can talk for a bit. I'd like to explain some things before tomorrow."

"Of course. Lead the way."

Instead of taking him downstairs, Bella decides to do it in her bed. She knows the day and the conversation they're about to have is going to exhaust her, and she really shouldn't sleep on the couch.

They settle against her pretty, gray headboard because Bella admits that she doesn't want to see his face.

Her fingers rub at the spot on the back of her hand before Edward reaches over to stop her.

"You don't have to look at me to hold my hand, Sugar." He kisses the abused skin.

Bella takes a deep breath and begins.

It's the exact definition of word vomit.

Bella never anticipated sharing everything with Edward tonight, but once she starts, she can't stop. He needs to know. All of it. And then he can decide what he wants to do with the information. It would be painful if he chose to go back to being friends, but she would live with it. She'll take any piece of him that he's willing to give.

From the kids in school to the sham of her wedding, Bella tells Edward everything, and he doesn't ask questions or make a sound, but she can feel him squeezing her fingers when she touches a particularly rough spot.

"My life wasn't that great before, but James destroyed everything. Victoria and his friends are just as guilty, but he made me lose my faith in love and that there are good people in the world," she explains. "I just think everything came to a head on the day of the wedding. I couldn't take it anymore and chose to lock myself away because I was afraid of getting hurt again. I still am. I'm terrified to lose you, and I'll always be afraid of that. You're wonderful, and I wish it was that easy, but it's not. It's going to take time."

She's so proud of herself for not crying. She feels like there's a weight lifted off of her chest that she didn't realize was there. The weight of not telling Edward about her past has been affecting her in ways she didn't realize.

When she's finished, Edward asks his first question. "Where have your parents been while you are suffering, Sugar?"

"When I asked to see a doctor in junior high because I thought I was depressed, my mom bought me a membership to Weight Watchers. They always blamed everything on my size. That if I were smaller like Alice, people wouldn't be so mean." Bella shrugs. "But the diets and starving myself never did anything to help. Kids hated me for some reason or another. I could never understand it. I eventually stopped trying and turned into an academic bookworm.

"And then James happened. We went to the same community college—I was going to school for photography. We ran into each other in the library, and he apologized for the way he treated me in high school. He promised to make it up to me and swept me off my feet. I should have known something wasn't right, but I was starving for attention, and he was giving it to me.

"When James decided we should get married, he didn't even get me an engagement ring, but I still agreed. My dad told me that he always thought Alice would be the daughter he'd walk down the aisle."

"Were your parents there that day?"

"Yeah. Mom got to play the happy mother-in-law to be, and Dad invited a bunch of his colleagues. After everything went down, they had the audacity to blame me for embarrassing them. They told me that I'd asked for it. That I shouldn't have fallen for the first guy to take an interest in me. It didn't take long for me to tell them to just stay out of my life. I couldn't handle their verbal and mental abuse when I was already going through hell. Alice cut ties with them when they tried to cut me off financially. My grandfather left us money that we couldn't touch until we turned eighteen. That didn't stop them from trying to control it. It cost me a lot of money in lawyer fees, but I finally won what was rightfully mine."

"I know you're getting tired but I want to tell you something." Edward pulls her until she's straddling his lap.

He places his hands on her hips and squeezes.

"You are perfect to me. I wouldn't want you to lose an ounce of who you are. I love how soft you are." He makes a bold move and grabs her butt with both hands. "Your ass is phenomenal. Don't let anyone tell you differently. You're so sexy without even trying, and you are mine, Sugar."

"I might need you to remind me from time to time," Bella tells him, leaning in and kissing him with as much passion as she can muster.

She's slightly drugged, so it's probably not as spectacular as she thinks it is.

Edward makes a show of tucking her into bed and leaves when he's sure she'll be okay.

"I'm only next door, Sugar. You need me, I'll be here in seconds."

She's asleep before he leaves her room.


	18. The Hunk 18

**18  
The Hunk**

When Edward asks Rosalie to make him her special espresso brew, she tilts her head to the side.

"Why? Up all night screwing your girlfriend's brains out?"

"No. Why would you even want to know that? We were up most of the night talking. Apparently, she didn't think we've been in a relationship." He rubs the back of his neck nervously. "I mean, we've been intimate—stop looking at me like that. I probably should have said affectionate, you pervert. I thought it was implied. I mean, I spend all of my time with her. Maybe it's my fault because I haven't asked her to be my girlfriend or taken her out on a date."

Rose looks confused.

"Um, Ed. How the fuck are you going to take her out when she can't even leave her porch?"

"Well, it's going to be tricky. I'm going to have to get creative after tonight because I'm going to set the bar high."

People are knocking on the locked door because they were supposed to open a few minutes ago.

Rosalie turns around, hands on her hips, and starts yelling.

"We're having a fucking conversation. Give us a goddamn minute!"

Edward shakes his head and walks by her to unlock the door.

"Stop being such a bitch before we're both out of jobs. Jesus Christ, Ro."

He apologizes to each customer as they enter the bakery before hiding out in the kitchen. He's not going to let his sister or anyone else ruin today for him.

He's already prepared everything for the second bake of the day, so he decides to take a selfie for Bella.

His tongue pokes out, and his eyes are crossed.

**I hope you're as excited for tonight as I am. This picture better not end up on Facebook.  
**  
_You're not funny. You know I have no use for Facebook._

_I'm really excited too.  
_

His phone chimes with another message, and he laughs so hard the sound echoes off the walls.

It's a photo of Bella, and it looks like she had a two-year-old do her makeup. Bright red lipstick everywhere.

The caption reads:

_I never learned how to execute the whole makeup thing. How did I do?_

**You will never not look beautiful to me, Sugar. But please wipe that shit off your face before it stains, and feel free to throw out the rest of your makeup. You don't need it. I prefer you natural.**

Sir, _yes, sir. It was just a quick job after you sent me that goofy selfie. I felt it was only fair that I reciprocate with one of my own._  
**  
You mean you gave me some pretty great blackmail for the next time your sister comes over? **

_Get back to work, slacker. I've got stuff to do. See you later, Honey.  
_  
**Okay, Sugar. Love you.**

Edward hits send and realizes what he just sent. It's too soon. Right? He knows he's in love with her. But after last night Edward knows this might cause problems. He would never tell her for the first time in a fucking text message.

"Fuck. ROSALIE!"

He's scrambling with his phone when his sister pops in.

"If you burned something again, I'm pulling the batteries out of the smoke … What the fuck, Ed?"

He's pacing back and forth, mashing the screen. "How do you unsend a text? There's got to be a way to make a text disappear right? I mean ... Shit." He tries to calm down, but his voice is high-pitched and panicky. "Siri, how do you unsend a fucking text message?"

Siri is offended by his language and doesn't respond. Instead, Edward gets a text message. He can't breathe. He's going to vomit. He's so scared to open it that he all but throws the phone at Rosalie.

"Please tell me that I didn't just get dumped via text message," he pleads.

Rosalie looks at the screen for a second. "Eh, I think you're good, but I don't know because the two of you are fucking strange. Read it."

Edward does.

_Um ... Okay?  
_  
He contemplates for ten minutes before replying to her simple message with one of his own.

**I'll see you tonight, Sugar.  
**  
He tries not to obsess over everything. He tries really hard, and he fails miserably.

When Rose offers to do the cleanup, he rushes out, stops for some essentials, and sneaks into his house.

Edward feels triumphant when he shuts his door without alerting his beautiful neighbor. His beautiful neighbor who might hate him now. He showers and changes into a pair of dark wash jeans and a nice shirt. He's so nervous. First date, palms and top lip sweating nervous. But also nervous about what he's planning on doing. This could go one of two ways, and he's really hoping it ends well.

Edward finds the notebook he used so long ago that it's gathered dust, grabs a pen, and starts writing.

_**So ... I figured that you've probably been obsessing about my text vomit earlier. Trust me, I have been obsessing ... over how to do this. I decided to go back to the beginning to bring us to where we are now. I know you might be confused, Sugar. It's understandable considering your past. But I know deep down, you know we're more than that. We are stronger than anything life throws at us.**_

_**I can honestly tell you that I love every single bit of you.**_

_**I started loving you the day I moved in and blocked the peephole you haven't used in months.**_

_**I knew my feelings for you were growing every time I sat, cramped on your porch, having dinner with you every night just to get to know everything about you.**_

_**I love you despite the fact that you have an unhealthy addiction to soda.**_

_**I realized I truly loved you when we found out that you were incredibly bad at making souffles and thought instant pudding would make a good substitution.**_

_**I even loved you when you spat that chocolate pudding all over me.**_

_**I love you on your good days, and I'll love you through every one of your bad ones.**_

_**Falling in love with you was as easy as burning that batch of Colossal Chocolate Chip Cookies was.  
**_

_**It's freezing out here, so if you could open the door and give me one of your big smiles and warm hugs, that would be great. -Yours, always, Edward**_

He slides the note under the door and knocks.

And he waits.

And waits some more.

When the door finally opens, Bella looks pissed. She's clutching the letter to her chest, but God, she looks furious. She's also crying.

"Sugar?"

"No one should ever have to start a first date in tears, Edward Cullen." She wipes her eyes. "But you managed to make me cry, Honey. I hope you're happy."

"Why would I be happy about making you cry? Why are you crying?"

"Because these are happy tears! I'm not used to happy tears, and now that they've started, I don't know how to get them to stop." She sobs.

Edward puts all of his first date supplies down and pulls Bella in for a hug.

"Oh, Sugar. What am I going to do with you?" He chuckles.

"I don't know. Love me?" She kisses him on his scruffy neck.

"Well, duh. I thought it was implied in my love letter to you. Better than a dumb text message, yeah?"

"The text message comes in at a close second to this letter. I'm buying a frame for it by the way." She smiles. "I wasn't freaking out all day just so you know. I was trying to figure out how to surprise you when you got home, but you snuck in."

"Feel free to surprise me now. I love surprises."

Bella smiles and steps into a pair of boots by her door. She's wearing his favorite knee-high socks with the dress he asked for.

"Okay. Go out and sit on the hood of your car," she instructs.

"Okay?"

"Just do it."

Edward walks out to his car, pulling his jacket tighter around him as he rests against the hood.

Bella's standing on the top step of her porch, hands clenched into fists at her sides and talking to herself as she takes the steps down at a snail's pace.

Edward wants to tell her to go inside and put a damn coat on, but she has this look of determination on her face that keeps him quiet.

When she steps onto the pathway, he wants to rush to her. He can see her hands shaking as she takes a step forward. She whispers to herself as she takes small steps and stops about halfway between the house and where he's standing.

"I really thought I could make it all the way, but I can't," she calls, her voice full of frustration.

Edward pushes off his car and meets her, hugging Bella so hard that her feet leave the ground. He walks them back into the warmth of her house and holds her until she stops shaking.

"You did so great, Sugar," he whispers into her hair. "I was very surprised."

"I had a plan," she mutters. "But I ruined it."

"What was your plan?"

"I was going to make it all the way to the car. I wasn't going to panic. I was going to tell you that I have never felt more loved in my entire life, and that I think I'm in love with you. I won't tell you until I'm completely sure."

"I wasn't expecting to hear it back, Sugar. I can see it when I look at you. I can feel it when you're near me. I just wanted to let you know where I'm at right now." He kisses her softly. "I am so proud of you. You're doing so great. I love you."

Bella smiles shyly.

"You better get the food off the porch before it gets ruined."

Edward grabs the take-out, the two-liter of cherry Coke he chose for the occasion, and a bouquet of daffodils he picked up just to make her smile.

He doesn't thrust them in her face like last time, but he does hold them away until she kisses him "hello". They get a little carried away, and the poor bouquet pays the price.

"They're still beautiful," Bella tells him before he can apologize.

"All right, our first date has officially begun. I hope you like Greek."

"I don't think I've ever had it, but I'm willing to try anything once."

She grabs glasses and ice while he opens containers and lights the candles in the center of the table.

Bella's eyes glow with happiness; the reflection of the fire flickering in the warm brown has Edward wanting to kiss her. So he leans over the table, careful of the candles, and pecks her softly on the lips.

He wants to tell her that he loves her again; now that he's said it, he never wants to stop, but Bella is easily overwhelmed, and he'd never do anything to make her uncomfortable.

Their eyes meet as Bella asks what he's brought for them to eat, and Edward realizes that she's maintaining eye contact with him. When he thinks about it, it's been a while now.

Another baby step. Another small milestone. And he can't even remember when it started.

"Some falafel, hummus, and olives to start us off." He places the appetizers in front of her. "I decided to play it safe with steak skewers and Greek salad for the main course."

Bella nods, eyeing that hummus curiously.

She picks up a piece of bread and dips it before bringing it to her mouth.

She tries really hard to give it an honest go, Edward can see that, but he isn't surprised when she spits the bite into her napkin.

"That is disgusting. The texture, the taste. Everything about it is awful," she says, downing half her drink.

"Try an olive. It'll get the taste out of your mouth." Edward laughs, spearing a stuffed olive on his fork and offering it to her.

She hums happily and does a little dance in her seat.

She's so fucking cute.

"So much better."

Bella and Edward agree that falafel is not for them. The skewers and salad are a big hit though. Edward jokes that if they ever have Greek cuisine again they'll just stick to main dishes and olives.

They work side by side clearing the table, extinguishing the candles, and tossing all the food they didn't enjoy into the garbage.

When they're finished, Edward grabs Bella's phone off the coffee table, and she watches him unlock it to scroll for her playlist before he places it on the dock.

They tried really hard not to make it a big deal when they added each other's fingerprints to their phones, but it was a pretty big deal. He doesn't understand how that didn't prove to Bella that they were in a relationship, but he remembers she's inexperienced, and he can't fault her for that.

The beginning of the first song makes Bella smile because she immediately recognizes it.

He knows this is one of her favorites and holds his hand out.

She stands in front of him, wrapping her arms around his neck, and steps forward until she's leaning in and her head is resting on his shoulder. She's soft and warm. Edward holds her in his big arms and starts moving them around the small space they have to work with.

They aren't _So You Think You Can Dance_ material, but they manage to make it through a few songs without any squashed toes or broken furniture.

"I think I'm ready for you to knock my socks off now," Bella whispers as the song comes to an end.

"You gotta pick out a movie first." He lets her go, immediately missing her warmth.

It doesn't take long because Bella is prepared. She drops onto the couch and presses a few buttons on the remote. The beginning credits of the movie start, and Edward knows that she's seen it more than once but doesn't say anything.

Instead, he snuggles up beside her, pulling her legs onto his lap.

Bella's engrossed in the movie, but Edward can't help himself. His hands wander along the bare skin between the top of her socks and the end of her dress. She's so smooth and soft under his touch. He pulls back when he thinks he's pushed it too far; she grabs his hand and puts it back on her thigh.

"I'm not that fragile, Edward," she whispers. "If we're going to do this, feel free to touch me."

He squeezes and her thighs clench together on their own accord.

"I mean, I'm not ready for that. But you can touch me."

She doesn't wait for him to ask her if he's sure.

The words are on his tongue when she moves until she's straddling his legs.

"Feel free to touch me, Honey."

His hands settle on her perfect ass, but Bella has other plans.

She grabs his face, pulling him to her, so she can control his mouth. As Edward deepens the kiss, Bella pulls one of his hands off her ass.

Edward almost chokes on his tongue when she places his palm against the side of her breast.

"I'm serious, Honey. We might be on our first date, but you were right—we've been together for so long. I can't deny you the normal, well, what I think is a normal dating experience. This is about as normal as we're going to get under the circumstances."

"It can't just be about me, Sugar. You have to want it too for this to work."

Bella kisses him again, pressing his hand into her lace and cotton-covered flesh.

"I want this. I want this so much."

Edward smiles against her mouth and squeezes her tit, earning a breathy moan. She presses her chest into his hand, silently begging him to touch her with both hands. She's so warm and pliable, more than a handful.

Perfect.

She lets him take control until he's fondling her chest without so much as a thought.

Bella runs kisses up and down his neck, stopping to suck and bite the spot behind his ear, driving Edward wild. He can feel his body respond to the feel of her, and he knows they need to slow it down.

"Sugar, we gotta stop. We're walking a fine line."

She pulls back, nodding in agreement.

"So, how was over the clothes first base?" She giggles. "It was my first time."

Edward's eyes widen. Bella didn't go into great detail about her relationship with her asshole ex-fiancé.

"Bella ... are you a ..." He raises an eyebrow in question. "You know?"

"A virgin? No. I was stupid and naïve. But things were different with him. It wasn't often, I don't think I ever finished, and we never had the lights on." Her lips caress his ear. "But I can honestly tell you that everything with you is like it's my first time. You are completely different. You're so much better, Honey."

This pleases Edward to no end.

"Sugar, I can tell you one thing. If you don't think you have ever finished, then you haven't."

Like he planned, he walks her to the door, kisses her softly one last time, and goes home. He stops to take a much-needed cold shower before he falls into bed and picks up his phone.

He boldly sends her a topless selfie.

So ... **What are your plans for tomorrow?  
**  
_I love your chest. I am free indefinitely for you. Go to sleep. You have an early morning._

_Thank you for a perfect first date, Honey. I seriously can't wait to see you tomorrow. Goodnight.  
_

**Hands down the best date ever. I'm going to have to get creative to top this one. I love you, Sugar. Goodnight.  
**


	19. The Hermit 19

**19**

**The Hermit**

True to his word, Edward strives to make every date night special despite Bella insisting that he doesn't have to put in such an effort. Date night or not, Edward always makes her feel loved and cherished. For her, just being around him is more than enough.

They've been on four dates and are having a chill night because Edward is off tomorrow and also because Bella's been so happy time has managed to slip away.

Christmas is quickly approaching, and she hasn't done much to prepare.

The night finds them sitting side by side on the couch with their laptops as they attempt to find the perfect gifts for their friends and loved ones.

Her list isn't very long, considering how small her social circle is, but she donates toys to the local hospitals and orphanages every year.

"I wish ..." Bella sighs.

"Wish what, Sugar?"

"I wish I could go see the lights. When I got my driver's license, Alice and I used to get hot chocolate and just drive around neighborhoods, looking at decorated houses." She sighs.

Edward wraps an arm around her.

"I bet you that by next Christmas, you'll be dragging me up and down the streets to see the lights. You just wait."

Sometimes, Bella doesn't understand how Edward can be so optimistic about their future. As o right now her progress is at a standstill.

He kisses her on the cheek and goes back to scrolling for the perfect gift for Alice.

Edward's parents are coming down for the holiday, so he's spending the Saturday before with Bella and her family.

Bella knows that Edward's mom is chomping at the bit to meet her. He has mentioned it once or twice ... maybe a thousand times since his declaration.

She wants to say it back. The words are on the tip of her tongue, just begging to be let out into the world, but something holds her back. Bella is still getting used to the fact that Edward, a very sweet, successful and very attractive man, wants to be with someone like her. He chose her of all the people in the world. Her, a recluse who can't make eye contact or socialize properly.

Bella has been thinking about their situation and has decided to make a bold step.

"Hey, Honey."

"Yep?"

"I was thinking ... maybe instead of our date on Wednesday, we could double ... here obviously ... but with Rosalie and Emmett?"

When Edward doesn't answer, Bella thinks maybe he didn't hear her clearly. She's about to repeat herself when he snaps his laptop shut, then hers, and tosses them both on the table before turning and pulling her hands into his.

"You're sure?"

"Yes. Just warn them that if it gets to be too much, they'll have to leave. I can only push myself so far. But I think I need to do this or at least try. If it goes well, maybe I'll be able to meet your parents when they come down for Christmas."

Edward kisses her hard.

"Only if you're absolutely sure, Sugar. Things have been going so well. I would hate for this to set you back."

Bella nods, but that isn't enough for him.

"No. You have to say it ... out loud."

"I'm sure. If I don't try, I'll never know, and like you said, things have been good. But maybe they could be better, you know?"

"Okay, I'll call her right now."

"Why don't you just text her?"

"Rosalie is dyslexic. She can make out most things, but I try not to make it difficult for her."

"That's sweet."

"No, it's me not wanting to get beat with a spatula."

"Make the call, Honey."

Bella burrows into his side and listens intently to his conversation with his sister.

"_I'm sorry, Ed. I love you, but there's no way Emmett's fat ass and mine could fit on that little stoop."_

Bella snorts.

"_Is that her? Wait ... it has to be her. You have no other friends. Tell Bella that I'll bring the wine and some appetizers."_

"She can hear you. You can bring wine, but we both don't drink. We prefer Coke."

"Okay. So apps and Coke. Anything else? Ask her if she wants me to take care of dessert as well."

Bella doesn't even think about it when she grabs Edward's phone and presses it to her ear.

"I'm sure whatever Edward makes for the Wednesday special will cover dessert. But thank you anyway."

Edward's hands make a trail up to her chest, but she swats him away and glares.

She loves when he touches her, but right now is not the time.

Since she won't let him feel her up, he decides to go with another approach, his mouth finding purchase on her neck.

Edward loves giving her hickeys. It's his way of marking her. There's no one who's going to see them, and she finds it very sensual, so she lets him have his fun.

"_You're welcome. I've been waiting to meet you for ages. Edward talks about you constantly. It's rather annoying, but it feels like I already know you a little."_

"He talks about you too. Tell me, how many times have you come at him with various kitchen utensils?"

Rosalie laughs.

Edward runs his tongue over the bruise he's left on her shoulder, and she has to hold back a moan.

"_Too many times to count. Emmett's cooking on the grill, so I should make sure our fire extinguisher is up to date. This man will be the death of me, let me tell you."_

"I look forward to meeting you both on Wednesday, Rosalie." Bella laughs before hanging up and tossing the phone on the table.

She climbs onto Edward's lap.

"You drive me absolutely batty."

"In the best possible way, right?" He chuckles, moving to the other side of her neck.

"Edward, I really don't want to have to wear a turtleneck when I meet your sister for the first time."

"I can't help myself," he whines and continues his assault.

He cups her breasts, lightly brushing his thumbs over her sensitive nipples.

"I guess turtlenecks aren't so bad." She groans.

Edward hums in agreement, his lips never leaving her skin.

Bella wants to yank her shirt off and experience what his hands feel like on her bare skin, but she's afraid to let him see her naked, well, partially naked.

She pictures Edward's past girlfriends being the complete opposite of her. Bella is soft, and her curves are definitely curvier than the norm. He tells her that he loves her just the way she is, but that nagging voice in the back of her head is still a little louder than Edward's.

He makes her body feel like it's a live wire—when he touches her, she feels sparks. She worries that one day he'll touch her in just the right way, and they'll burn the house down.

When Bella can't take any more bruising torture, she pulls his mouth to hers and silently tells him what she isn't able to say out loud yet.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

She hopes he can feel it. The way her heart races when they're together. Sometimes the beat is so loud it echoes in her ears.

He pulls away and gives her a panty-dropping smile.

Bella wonders if he's ever noticed that she has stopped wearing dresses around him. It's too much temptation.

"I love you too, Sugar," he whispers, pressing his forehead to hers.

"I can't believe you've covered me in hickeys. Your sister is going to think all we do is have sex," she says as her face turns a brilliant shade of red.

Edward bounces her on his knees. "Let her think what she wants. And by all means, feel free to give me a few of my own." He pulls the collar of his shirt to the side. "Let's go, little vampire. We're on a time crunch, and you have a lot of catching up to do."

Bella laughs and latches onto his skin.

It is only fair.

She's never given someone a hickey before but it looks like it's hard to screw up. By the time Bella's covered the right side of Edward's neck, she can feel something poking her. Right. There. She tries her best to ignore it and kisses her way over to the other side and gets to work. When she deems Edward successfully marked, the roof of her mouth is sore but it was definitely worth it. Her lips are swollen and she's breathless.

Edward has his eyes closed and his head tilted back.

"Sugar, don't take this the wrong way, but can you please get off my lap?"

In a panic, Bella scrambles to the other end of the couch, apologizing over and over again for something. To be honest, she doesn't understand what she did wrong.

Her hickeys don't hurt, so she knows Edward isn't in pain. At least she hopes he isn't. Did she do it wrong?

"Stop apologizing, Sugar," Edward says.

"Are you okay?" she asks softly.

"I'm fine. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable with my reaction."

"Huh?"

"I know you felt me, Bella. You drive me crazy. I 'react' whenever you touch me. It's just easier to hide when you aren't sitting on my lap."

Bella thinks about it for a moment before her eyes widen.

"Oh. OH! Edward, that's nothing to be embarrassed about. You're a man. I'm a woman. We do things." Her face must resemble a tomato right now.

At least, she didn't do it wrong.

"I would never want to pressure you or make you uncomfortable," he tells her, and it's genuine.

"I didn't feel pressured or pushed. I mean, I felt pressure for sure." She wiggles her eyebrows. "Not that I'm complaining."

"Sugar ..." Edward says in a warning tone.

"What? We're both adults, Honey. I thought we agreed that you would stop treating me so delicately."

"We did. I'm trying not to, but I love you. It's hard."

"Damn right it was," Bella blurts out.

Where did this side of her come from? Bella has never been so bold. Edward must bring it out of her. Yeah, he definitely does.

"I'm sorry. I know I'm making things ha-difficult," she says, scooting until she's lying on the couch and pats the spot beside her. "Come over here and cuddle with me. We'll make out and be lazy for the rest of the night, and if you 'react', it will be fine because I'm your girlfriend, and it's to be expected."

"You're sure?"

"Edward, you're not the only one 'reacting'. At least, mine is less noticeable. Come on."

It's a tight squeeze, but they finally find a way to make it work. Sure, they're pressed together like a pack of sardines, but no one is complaining.

Bella has one leg thrown over Edward, and one of his is resting between her thighs.

His arms are wrapped around her middle, and Bella's arms are wrapped around his neck.

"You need a bigger couch," he mumbles against her lips.

"Or we could take it upstairs. My bed is more than big enough."

"Sugar ..."

"I feel like I'm trying to corrupt you." She giggles. "I'm sorry. I'll look for a bigger couch tomorrow ... maybe one with a chaise lounge."

"That'll work. But I do like being this close to you," Edward admits.

Bella hums in agreement.

"Kiss me, Honey."

Bella knows he'd give her the world if he could.

She can't help but smile against his mouth.

Before they separate for the night, Edward manages to find room for a couple more hickeys, and Bella just knows that she's going to have her hands full trying to cover them up.


	20. The Hunk 20

**20**

**E**

When Edward gets to work on Wednesday morning, he's happy to see Emmett and Rosalie in the office going over something. Probably the books because Em's great with numbers, Ro's dyslexia plays tricks on her, and Edward is no help when it comes to the financial aspect of running a business.

He's happy to see them because there are a few rules he wants to go over before tonight.

He turns the ovens on to preheat and pokes his head in the room. "I need to talk to you when you're finished. Both of you."

They nod and go back to whatever it is they're doing.

Edward scrambles around prepping for the first wave of customers. When he has everything in the oven, his sister comes out of the office with a big smile on her face.

"Can I just tell you how fucking excited I am to finally meet your girlfriend? Seriously, I know we've only talked once and that it was over the phone, but I think we're best friends already."

"Stop right there," he tells her and calls for Emmett.

His brother-in-law comes stomping into the room. "What's up?"

Edward turns to his sister. "Ro, just talking like that is going to overwhelm her. You have to be cautious. I need you to be on your best behavior tonight. That goes for both of you."

"We're not children, Edward. We know how to act civilized."

Emmett scoffs.

"No. There's more to it than that with Bella. Don't be offended if she doesn't make eye contact, don't ask her questions about her past, and please, for the love of God, do not touch her," Edward stresses. "If it gets to be too much for her, she's going to ask you to leave, so if that happens, don't let it hurt your feelings. Just go. This is a big deal for her. I'm really proud of her for even attempting this, so don't push."

"Of course, Ed," Rosalie says. "I would never do anything to ruin this for you. I know you love her."

Edward sighs in relief. "Thank you. I just really need this to go well because she said if she can get through dinner tonight she might consider meeting Mom and Dad when they come out. That's a huge deal for me."

"For Mom too. You haven't introduced her to anyone in years. I'll pick up the soda and apps. Is she allergic to anything?"

"We both hate Greek appetizers, but other than that, Bella isn't picky. I'm sure whatever you grab will be great."

The timers start going off, so he gets to work while Rosalie prepares the storefront for the day.

He puts a lot of thought and work into today's special and takes extra time to make the board pretty.

When his sister can't make out what it says, he reads it out loud, and she gives him a big smile.

"She's going to love it."

Edward nods and goes to prep for the second round of the day.

He gets a text around eleven.

_Okay. There's no way I can cover these even with a turtleneck. What do I do?  
_  
**Well, mine are covered by my chef's jacket, so my sister hasn't seen them yet. By the way, who knew your mouth could open that wide? Mine are huge.  
**  
_You are walking right into multiple ways I can make that sound dirty. Instead, I'll let it slide. I'm calling my sister to see if she can do anything about these bruises. It might take stage makeup. I look like I got attacked._

**You did. By me. Your boyfriend. I practically mauled you. **

_Feel free to maul me anytime. Well, not tonight while your sister and her husband are present ... maybe you could come over early?  
_  
**As if you have to ask. Don't let your sister cover them up, please. I love you. Let them see that. I gotta get back to work.**

_See you later.  
_  
Edward manages to get through the day. Rosalie wants to know everything there is to know about Bella, but he just tells her that she'll have to find out on her own. Bella will share what she's comfortable sharing when she's ready.

When they leave for the night, Rosalie rushes off to pick up her contribution to dinner, and Edward just rushes home.

Bella's standing on her porch in a thick coat and her boots when he pulls up, and he's just rounding the front of his hood when he sees a flash of red coming at him.

"Oomph," he says as he catches Bella.

They're standing in the street in front of his car.

This is the farthest she's ever gone.

He wants to cry.

"I started falling in love with you when you showed up on my stoop with Chinese food, and I found out that you couldn't use chopsticks to save your life," she says.

"I love that you feed my unhealthy addiction to soda." She kisses him quickly and pulls away.

"I knew I loved you when you tried really hard to eat my vegetarian chili." They both laugh.

"I love that you don't push me, but it's because of you I'm standing in the street, professing my love."

"I love that you make me feel happy, special, and okay to be myself."

"I love that you somehow know when I'm having negative thoughts and send me ridiculous texts or pictures. I love you even though you made me look like a fucking leopard. But most of all, I love you because you take me on my good days and are there for my bad days. I love you, Honey."

And that's when Edward does cry. He's not full on sobbing or anything, but there are tears streaming down his face.

"Happy tears?" Bella asks, wiping them away as quickly as they fall.

"The happiest," he croaks. "I fucking love you so much, Sugar."

She smiles and shivers. "I love you too. Now not because I'm freaking out or anything. I'm actually pretty calm right now. I'm freezing, and I think I pulled a muscle sliding through the snow on the walkway. Can we please go inside now?"

"I have another idea."

"If it involves more hickeys, I really don't think my neck can take much more, Honey. They're literally everywhere." She pulls her collar to the side, and she's right.

There really isn't any room for him to work with. He definitely got carried away last night, the night before, and the one before that.

"Nah, this idea is probably one you never got the chance to experience." He pulls her over to the passenger side of his car and opens the door. When he looks up, he finds Bella frozen in panic.

"I can't leave, Edward. I'm not ready for that. No," she manages to choke out.

"Calm down, Sugar. We aren't going anywhere." He helps her in and runs to the driver side.

Once he has the heater going, he pushes his seat as far back as it'll go and pulls her onto his lap, bulky coats be damned.

"What are we doing?" Bella asks.

"We're going to make out in my car like we're in high school."

Bella starts to giggle, but Edward catches her lips, effectively shutting her up.

At some point, Bella's ass hits the horn, startling them, and they share a laugh.

They have their fun until Bella remembers that she left dinner in the oven. She scrambles off Edward's lap and practically falls out of the car in her haste.

It happens before he can say or do anything.

Edward watches her rush up the walkway and sees the moment her foot steps on a patch of ice. With a surprised squeak her legs give out, and she lands hard.

"Ow," she cries.

Edward decides to walk in the snow beside the icy walkway to get to her as quickly as possible. She's covered her face with her hands and is shaking so badly that he starts to think the worst. That she's backsliding. He needs to get her in the house quickly and call his sister—

"Bella, stop laughing! I thought you really hurt yourself."

"Oh, man. It's lucky I've got a lot of padding back there." She guffaws. "But still. I think I broke my ass."

Edward pulls her to her feet and kisses her cold nose.

"You're a nut. Let's get inside so we can make sure you didn't actually break something."

They walk up the steps together, Bella's still laughing, so it makes it a little difficult seeing as the steps are just as slippery as the path.

"I have a bag of salt at my house. Once I make sure you're okay, I'll throw some on the steps and walkway." He helps Bella out of her coat and smiles when he sees her wearing his favorite sweater dress.

She's wearing tights underneath because it's cold, but he still loves it.

He loves her.

And he's the luckiest motherfucker in the world because she loves him too.

"Seriously, Honey. I think it's going to be hard to sit down for a while." She's still giggling. "I might need a butt rub after you salt the walkway—that's more important. I don't want to see your brother-in-law face plant. That's just a lawsuit waiting to happen."

"I would love to rub your bum until it feels better, Sugar," he quips, pecking her lips and telling her to check dinner while he works on salting the walkway.

He changes out of his work clothes and into some warm ones before grabbing the heavy bag of salt and a scoop.

Bella stands in her doorway, watching him while he focuses on her steps and particularly the spot she slipped on. When he's returned to the porch, he drops the bag and pulls her into his cool arms.

"You're freezing."

"Ice is good for injuries. I think it would be beneficial if you just sat on me while I give you a good rub down."

They're making out, and Edward still has his hands all over Bella's ass, underneath her tights and lace panties, which is something new for them, when someone knocks on the door.

"Ugh, Rosalie has impeccable timing." He gives her one last kiss. "Do you think you can handle opening the door while I try to get rid of my problem?"

"I ... I caused the problem, so I think I can." She climbs off him and nods to herself.

He watches her walk to the door and open it slowly.

"Was Emmett able to make it here without injury?" she asks his sister, who looks dumbstruck.

"Fuck, you're gorgeous," Rosalie says rather bluntly before leaning in and finding Edward. "Why didn't you tell me she was fucking beautiful?"

Bella blushes ten different shades of red.

"Sorry about my wife." Emmett chuckles, hands full of stuff. "She'll never admit it, but I think she's secretly into girls."

Rosalie turns to her husband and playfully glares.

"Yup. That's why I married you. You're so feminine it fills the void in my life."

"It's freezing outside. Please, come in," Bella says, stepping aside and giving them a wide berth to enter.

"I'm so pissed at my brother, Bella. You have no idea," Rosalie tells Bella.

"Um. For what?" she asks.

Edward walks up and slips his arms around her middle, pulling her to his chest. He's so proud of her for opening the door without getting upset.

"Because he's been keeping you from me for all this time, silly."

He can tell his sister really wants to touch Bella, so he sends her a stern look.

But Rosalie never really listens to anyone.

"Ed told me that I need to keep my hands to myself, but I really want to hug you, seeing as you're the one who's put a permanent smile on his face. I know you don't like strangers touching you, but you should also know that I don't hug just anyone." She opens her arms in invitation.

Bella takes a deep breath and steps out of Edward's arms and into his sister's.

Their hug is brief, but they are both smiling when they step away. Bella doesn't exhale until she's back in Edward's embrace, and he smiles into her hair.

"Shit. You're right, Em. I'm totally into girls." Rosalie winks at Bella. "That means we have to get a divorce. I get everything, you get nothing but your medical bills."

Emmett pouts.

"Can't we just have threesomes? I wouldn't mind watching you with another woman."

Edward clears his throat. He doesn't want to hear about his sister's sex life.

"Let's sit down and eat. Bella's been cooking all day, and I'm sure your appetizers are cold by now."

Everyone is settled at the table, and Edward can tell that Bella is at ease by the way she converses with his family.

Their clasped hands are resting on the table as they munch on the pigs in a blanket and mini quiches that Rosalie brought.

His sister spends a lot of time complimenting Bella, but he puts his foot down when she asks his girlfriend what her bra size is.

"Jesus, Ro. Shut the fuck up, why don't you. That's none of your damn business," he grits out.

Bella leans over and kisses his cheek before whispering.

"D, by the way."

"Hey, secrets don't make friends." Rosalie laughs. "And it's not my fault, Ed. She's all tits and ass. Like a walking wet dream."

At some point, Bella starts calling her Rose, which up until this point pissed his sister off. Instead of bitching about it, Rosalie-Rose nicknames his girlfriend Bells.

He knows Alice calls her that sometimes but doesn't say anything.

"So ..." Rosalie starts, her smile growing. "Emmett and I have some news we wanted to share. Considering how serious the two of you are, we wanted to tell you together."

"Okay?" Edward asks.

Bella squeezes his fingers.

Rosalie reaches out for her husbands hand but he holds up his fork and motions for her to continue.

"We're pregnant. Really pregnant this time. There's a fetus up in this bitch." She points to her stomach. "You're going to be an aunt and uncle."

Bella's hand falls out of his and onto her lap. She frowns into her plate. Edward can practically feel her reverting to her insecurities.

"Don't even think about questioning this, Bells," Rosalie tells her, waiting until Bella looks up. "My brother loves you. Fuck, I want to divorce my husband and marry you. You will definitely be in our lives indefinitely, and by association, you will be a part of this baby's life. Don't doubt that for a second."

Bella smiles, but Edward can tell it's not genuine.

"Besides, just think of this. If Ed fucks everything up, I'll be waiting in the wings. Say the word, and I'll drop this loser"—she points to Emmett and snaps her fingers—"like that. We'll get together and raise the baby to love rainbows and shit."

And just like that, Bella's smile grows. She leans into Edward and laughs.

"As flattered as I am, Rose. I'm in love with your brother, and I doubt he could do anything to fuck it up. Thanks for the offer though."

They laugh, and Rosalie's eyes narrow.

"Did Edward tell you that he wanted to teach the baby to say 'fucktastic' as their first word?" she asks.

Bella nods.

"We don't have secrets. He also told me that you got his mouth washed out with soap for saying the very same thing. Don't hate me or anything, but I think it would be justified."

"I don't think I could ever hate you, Bells. You'll fit into our family just fine. I know you have your reservations about meeting our parents. but my mom and dad are super chill. Mom has changed a lot since the days of soap and taking away electronics. She doesn't particularly like our crass language, but she understands that we're adults."

"I'm still on the fence about Christmas. Tonight went well, but I can't do something just because other people want me to. I need to want it. I can't promise you that I will. I can promise that I will sincerely think about it. I know it would mean a lot to Edward."

"Fuck, Edward. Think of me and our love child."

Emmett asks what they have for dessert, so Bella grabs the box Edward brought home from The Bakery.

She opens the box revealing four perfect miniature cakes. On the lid of the box is their name.

_**She's all mine, molten chocolate cake.  
**_  
Bella pulls him in for a chaste kiss. But like most of the time, it quickly escalates.

"Come on, Em. Time to go home. We'll stop and get ice cream. I'll try to seduce Bella some other time. Looks like Edward's about to get a handful of the goods."

They break apart long enough to walk the couple to the door and watch them get to their car safely before Bella jumps into Edward's arms.

"My ass is so sore. I think I need another massage."

"I'd be happy to help you out, Sugar."


	21. The Hermit 21

**21**

**The Hermit**

Before they know it, Christmas is only a week away.

Bella feels like she is personally keeping UPS and FedEx in business with all the online shopping she's been doing. The deliveries are steadily pouring in, and she's also receiving Edward's packages while he's at work so the snow doesn't destroy anything.

When Edward informs her that he has plans to go actual shopping with Emmett, Bella makes a bold decision to see if Rose wants to hang out with her while he's gone.

They've talked a couple of times since their double date, and Bella feels comfortable with the idea of hanging out alone with Edward's sister.

Rose shows up five minutes after Edward kisses Bella goodbye, and she brings supplies.

Bella can understand the box of nail polish, but the massive fruit bouquet throws her off.

"You do know I have food, right?" She laughs.

"I know that. I stopped by an Edible Arrangements on my way here. I figure Ed buys you flowers all the time, so I brought you flower-shaped fruit. Gotta step up my game." Rose winks. "I'm just kidding. One of my relatives sent it us to congratulate us on the baby. I figured we could eat it and do each other's toes."

She proudly shows off her collection of nail polish, and Bella laughs, holds up one finger, and rushes up the stairs.

When she returns, she finds that Rose has parked herself on the couch and is shuffling through her box of polish while munching on a pineapple-shaped daisy. She looks up and almost spits the fruit out of her mouth.

"Holy shit! That's a lot of nail polish."

Bella puts the giant, clear caddy down on the table and opens it.

"I have a lot of free time, so I tend to change colors every couple of days. I buy them from different parts of the world." Bella points to every shelf of the caddy. "They're labeled. My favorites are from Spain though."

Rose looks through the collection, pulling out bottles and asking a million questions.

"I never got to do most of the normal girly shit when I was in school," Rose admits. "I was in special classes because of my dyslexia, so kids didn't exactly flock to me."

"I never got to do anything normal because I was bullied throughout most of my childhood and then in my teen years. We're sort of kindred spirits, you and I." Bella gives Rose a stern but playful look. "That doesn't mean I'm going to leave your brother and be a second mommy to your baby."

Rose laughs like a maniac.

"Anyway. We both missed out on the slumber party experience, so I think we should turn on a cheesy Christmas movie and paint each other's toes the same color, considering we're BFFs."

Bella wants to argue that Edward is her best friend, but she doesn't want to hurt Rose's feelings.

Instead, she shuffles through her collection of nail polish, pulling two different bottles out.

"Santa's Sleigh or Mistletoe Magic?" she asks, holding up a bottle of glittery red and a shimmering green.

Rose ponders.

"I think we should do one toe red, one toe green, and make it a pattern. We can coordinate, like when you end with red I'll start with green."

Bella nods and gets everything they'll need, including two bottles of sparkling water because Rose shouldn't have caffeine, and she doesn't want to drink Coke in front of her.

Both girls are tall, so they cram together on each end of the couch and put their feet in each other's laps. Bella chooses _National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation_ that's been playing on repeat all day.

They talk over the movie as they pass the colors back and forth and destroy the fruit bouquet.

"So ... have you given any more thought about meeting our parents?"

"I've been thinking about it constantly," Bella admits.

"And?"

Before Bella can answer her, the house phone rings. She leans over the back of the couch to grab it.

"Hello?"

"_Ugh. Bella. I've been calling your cell for ages. I was starting to get worried," _Alice grumbles.

"I'm sorry, I must have left it upstairs when I was grabbing my nail polish. Is everything okay?"

"_Yes ... no. Not really. Jasper's grandfather had a heart attack this morning. It's not looking good, so we're going to fly out to Texas as soon as we can find an open flight. They're already talking about funeral arrangements, so we're trying to get out there so Jasper can see him."_

"That's terrible. I'm so sorry." Bella sniffs. "Is there anything I can do?"

"_No. I just wanted to call and let you know what's happening. I'm not sure if we'll be back for Christmas."_

"Don't worry about me, Alice. Everything will be fine. Let me know what's going on, and please be safe. Give Jasper my love."

Bella's grown close to Jasper over the years and knowing that he's in pain is hard for her.

"_I will. I just hate the idea of leaving you alone on Christmas. What about our traditions?"  
_  
"Jasper's grandfather is more important than baking and decorating cookies, Ali. I'm sure I can manage to watch A Christmas Story five times in a row by myself. I'll be okay."

In seconds, Rose is flapping her hands in Bella's face.

"If you think for one second you're spending Christmas alone, you are sorely mistaken, woman," she says sternly. "If it comes down to it, I'll tell my family to go fuck themselves and come spend the day with you."

Bella puts one finger to her mouth.  
_  
_"_Who's that?"_

"Rose. Edward's sister. She came over while the boys are shopping."

"_Huh?"_ Alice sounds surprised. "_I still feel bad. Should I just send Jasper by himself and stay with you?"  
_  
Bella looks Rose in the eye as she answers her sister. "No, Ali. Be there for him. It sounds like he's going to need you." She takes a deep breath. "I'm going to spend Christmas with Edward's family. His parents are coming down for the holiday, and he really wants me to meet them."

Rose is bouncing in her seat, careful not to smudge the polish on Bella's toes.

"_Really? Wow, Bella. Just wow. Have you talked to Zafrina lately?"  
_  
"No. We have an appointment a week after New Year's. Why?"  
_  
_"_I just ... You're making so much progress that it's kind of making my head spin. She's going to be so happy with you. I gotta go. Jasper found a flight, so I need to pack. I'll call you as soon as I know what's going on. Please pray for our travels and his grandfather."_

Bella fights the urge to roll her eyes. "I love you, Ali. I'll see you when you get back."

They hang up, and Rose practically jumps across the couch and tackles Bella.

"Yes! I don't have to spend Christmas bored as shit. I'm so fucking happy." She cries.

"I need to make another call before we get back to our pedicures," Bella tells her. She goes to the kitchen and calls Edward.

When he picks up, it sounds like he's in the middle of a mosh pit. "_Hey, Sugar. Is everything okay?"  
_  
"Well, Alice called me. She and Jasper have to fly out to Texas tonight. His grandfather isn't doing too well, and they probably won't make it back for Christmas," she tells him.

"_So. Rose and Emmett can entertain my parents, and I'll spend the day with you. I'll pick up some mistletoe on my way home,"_ he jokes.

"Actually, I was thinking. Do you think your parents would mind spending the holiday here at my house?"

"_Sorry, babe. I don't think I heard you right. It's a fucking madhouse. Emmett got punched in the nose helping me fight over the last ... I can't tell you. But did you just say you want my parents to come to your house for Christmas?"  
_  
"Please be careful. No gift is worth your safety, and I prefer you in one piece. I have to say I'm not really surprised Emmett got hurt. Rose is still here. We're giving each other pedicures and watching movies." Bella says.

"And my parents?"

"You heard me right, Honey. I did say that I want to meet your parents and host Christmas at my house. If that's okay?"

It's suddenly a lot quieter than it was.

"_Sorry. I wanted to be able to hear you clearly, so I stepped into the changing room. I'm probably going to get some weird looks when I leave but whatever. I fucking love you. We're almost finished here, so wrap it up with Rosalie. I want you all to myself when I get home."  
_  
"I love you too. Bye, Honey."

When Bella returns, Rose is already packing everything up and sporting a big smile.

"Just so you know we're totally sticking to the traditions you have with your sister. I'm not the best at baking, but Ed can help you with that part. I'm not the greatest artist either, but I love decorating cookies. My mom is a hobbyist, and she always loves a good project. Dad will help you eat them. He's a doctor, so he doesn't get much time off. He'll probably get shit faced on eggnog with Emmett and watch 'A Christmas Story' a hundred times.

"We could make dinner together if you want. I mean, I know you and Ed like doing that kind of stuff together, but I can help out. I'm so freaking excited. But don't worry. I'll make sure Mom doesn't overwhelm you. Edward and I will have her on her best behavior. I promise."

Bella can feel the nerves start to set in. "Rose. Breathe," she says calmly.

"Yeah. The fetus requires oxygen and all that. Sorry. I just really love you, not joking about wanting to bone you or anything. I truly see you as the sister I always wanted and never got. Instead, I got stuck with Ed."

"Hey, I'm pretty thankful you got Edward." Bella laughs. "I would love to plan Christmas day with you after I've talked to him. I need to prepare myself for this. I know Edward's talked about my ... issues a little. This is going to be a big step, and on January seventh, I will have gone without seeing my therapist for three months. I've made a lot of progress without her. I'd really like to make it to the seventh, and that won't happen if I can't get through Christmas."

"Of course. Of course. Talk to Ed and call me tomorrow so we can plan a menu and ... I just like talking to you, so we can just bullshit if you want."

Bella laughs. "I enjoy talking to you too. Thank you for being patient with me, Rose. I really appreciate it. I'm not used to having people in my corner."

"I'd kill for you. Seriously. Now give me a hug and walk me out. I don't want to be here when Ed gets home. He's been away from you for so long he's probably going to attack you at the door."

Bella blushes, but at the same time, she's hoping that will happen.

She walks Rose all the way to her car, which is parked in the spot at the end of the walkway, to make sure she gets there accident free.

And then she goes inside and waits for her boyfriend to come home to her.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

When Edward enters her house, he pockets his key, shrugs out of his jacket, and calls for her. "Sugar?"

Bella smiles, snuggling down into the couch cushions and waits for him to find her.

Her plans are foiled when her cell phone starts ringing. Her hand shoots out and snatches it off of the coffee table. "Hello?" she whispers.

"Why are you hiding on the couch? And why are we whispering?" Edward whispers.

"I figured you'd come and find me, but you cheated. I'm whispering because I was hoping you wouldn't find me yet. I don't know why you're whispering." Bella laughs.

"Well, I found you. Why are you hiding?"

"Because I wanted to surprise you. Come to me, Honey."

Bella hangs up and tosses her phone back onto the table before striking the pose she's been practicing since Rose left.

She's hoping it'll come off as sexy when Edward's head pops over the back of the couch, goofy grin in all its glory. It quickly turns into a lust-filled gaze as he takes in her state.

Bella spent some time on her appearance after Rose left. She curled her hair, put some lip gloss on, and slipped into a pretty dress and nothing else besides a pair of panties. She's laying on the couch, her hair splayed all around her head with her legs folded in such a way. She knows he can see her Christmas-themed panties from where he's standing. The glazed look in his eyes make her feel brave.

"Kick off your shoes and come cuddle with me, Honey."

He obviously doesn't need to be told twice. Edward vaults over the back of the couch and lands on Bella, immediately finding her lips and slipping a hand over her breast. "No bra?" he asks against her mouth.

"Didn't think you'd mind if I went without. I could go put one on, if you prefer?" She tries to push him away.

"Don't you fucking dare, Sugar."

Bella slips her tongue into his mouth, grabbing his hair and tugging it gently. She knows it'll get a reaction.

He presses that reaction against her thigh, and she moans.

"I don't think I'm ready for that quite yet," she admits.

He starts to pull away, but she wraps her legs around him.

"Wait. I'm not ready ... to go all the way. But I'm interested in something I never got the chance to experience."

"Yeah?" he asks weakly. "What experience are we talking about?"

She sees that he's trying hard to maintain control.

"I've never dry humped my boyfriend on a couch before. Well, technically, I've never dry humped anyone anywhere before." She uses her hold on his hair to pull him down for another passionate kiss.

At the same time, her legs bring him down until he's pressed up against her, right where she wants him most.

They both groan.

He's as hard as steel, pressing against his zipper.

It's almost embarrassing how wet she is.

"Fuck, Sugar." Edward groans into her neck and thrusts against her heat.

"Hmm. Keep doing that," she whispers, licking the place behind his ear.

It does something to him.

Suddenly their position has changed. Edward's laying on the couch with Bella straddling his lap.

She shakes her head. Negativity clouds over her lust-filled thoughts. She's starting to lose her bravado. "I'm too heavy."

"The fuck you are. You're just right." He pulls the dress up over her hips and grips her bare skin. "You never got to experience this, so I want you to be in control. I'm yours, Sugar. Just do what makes you feel good."

He lifts his hips, his erection hitting her just right, making her moan loudly.

"You feel so good against me," Edward tells her, guiding her hips until she starts moving.

Bella's head falls back in pleasure as she works herself over him.

"You're so wet. I can feel it. One day soon, I'll taste you. I can't wait."

Bella's moan echoes off the walls at his words, and an unfamiliar feeling starts to grow deep in her belly.

"I bet you taste sweet, Sugar." His hands trail up underneath her dress until they find her bare breasts.

"Edward." She groans, her movements start to grow erratic.

She's looking for something. She doesn't know what it is, but she just knows it's going to be spectacular.

"Bella," he grits out, rubbing his thumbs over her sensitive nipples.

She feels something inside her snap, her entire body locking up, shaking as she lets out a long moan and rides out the feeling because she never wants it to end.

"Sugar." Edward thrusts one more time and stills.

Not caring if she's too heavy or that she's squashing him, Bella collapses, snuggling into Edward's chest.

"That. Was. Amazing." She pants.

"Fucking amazing." Edward breathes.

His hands are still under her dress but are now splayed across her bare back.

"I've never ... I don't know."

"You've never had an orgasm?"

Bella looks up at him, completely confused.

"That's what that was?"

Edward's smile is a mile wide. "Yes. And I can't wait to give you many more." He nuzzles her neck, biting the soft flesh. "But I really need to change my pants."

"Was I that wet?" Bella asks in horror.

Edward laughs. "No, Sugar. I mean you were definitely wet, but I also had an orgasm, and I'm a sticky mess."

She smiles a goofy smile. "Me too. Meet me back here in ten? I'll order a pizza."

"I fucking love you."

"I can't wait to tell you that I love fucking you," Bella says honestly, smacking him on the ass as he walks by.

"One orgasm and I've created a monster. Not that I'm complaining." He kisses her softly before running next door.

Bella cleans herself up and stares at her reflection.

The girl in the mirror's cheeks are flushed, and her eyes hooded. Bella reaches out to touch the reflection, making sure that she isn't looking at someone else.

Their hands meet and they both smile.

This is real. Bella never pictured herself where she is right now.

She hears the front door open.

"Sugar! I'm home!"

She laughs and meets him at the bottom of the stairs.

"You're a dork."

"Your dork."

"Damn straight."


	22. The Hunk 22

**22**

**The Hunk**

Christmas is two days away, and their parents will be arriving tomorrow when Edward and Rosalie realize that they forgot one very important detail.

"What do you mean they aren't staying with you guys?" Edward asks, tossing an empty tray into the sink and turning to his sister. "They can't stay with me. Bella is right next door. I don't want to overwhelm her. We've been preparing for days now."

And by preparing, Edward means that every time Bella starts to have her doubts or dark thoughts, he takes her to the couch, pulls her down onto his lap, and lets her have some fun. Sure, he also benefits from her fun, but that's not the point.

They've found a new hobby. They do it frequently. Edward's laundry pile is embarrassing.

"Ed, we've already cleared out the guest room to prepare for the baby," Rosalie says, bringing him out of his dirty thoughts. She shrugs like it's nothing.

"You're not due for like six months."

"Excuse me for being excited about my child, dick head," she snaps. "We don't have a bed for them."

"I don't have anything in the second bedroom, and I only have a loveseat in my living room."

"Well, it's too late to try to get them a hotel room. You'll have to figure something out."

Edward is really starting to get pissed off at his sister. She's been grating on his nerves for days. If it's not one thing, it's another. A batch of cookies was slightly underbaked and fell apart when she tried boxing them for a customer. Apparently, he didn't load the trays on the drying rack correctly. Other reasons were just as ridiculous.

He's over it.

"You know what, Ro? Go fuck yourself. I'm busy trying to make sure that my emotionally fragile girlfriend is going to get through this week, and all you can do is bitch about every little thing." He slams the tray in his hands down on the counter.

They watch as it shatters into pieces.

"You already have me picking them up from the airport when I should be with Bella like we planned. You're pregnant, not an invalid. You call yourself Bella's friend, but you aren't doing anything to help her through this. You're just making everything harder."

Rosalie's bottom lip quivers. Apparently, the thing growing inside her gave her feelings because if she's not bitching, she's crying.

Edwards is over it. All of it.

Instead of waiting for the waterworks and excuses to start, he grabs his keys.

"Don't worry about it. I'll figure everything out because you've left me with no other choice, but after the holiday, we're going to sit down and discuss some shit." He stops in front of Rose and leans down to look her in the eye. "Let's get one thing straight. I'm not going to let you ruin Christmas for Bella."

He leaves her to finish closing the store and drives home.

He's early, so he doesn't expect Bella to be waiting for him. Edward is pissed and full of pent-up aggression, but he has to see her. He knows she'll make everything better. Bella always makes things better.

He bursts through her front door, making her jump up from the couch, clutching her chest in surprise until she sees that it's him.

"Honey? I thought you weren't going to be home until around four or five?" She approaches him slowly. She can probably feel the rage rolling off of him.

Fuck, he never thought his mood might scare her, but he can't help himself.

"I got off early," he grits out, unbuttoning his chef's jacket and throwing it on the ground before gathering her in his arms. He walks them to the couch and lays her down, pressing one leg between her thighs. His mouth devours hers as he cups her tit and pinches her nipple too roughly.

"Ow! Edward?" Bella breaks away from the kiss, and his lips find purchase on her neck. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"Rose just royally pissed me off." He groans in her ear. "I'm so fucking mad, and I don't know how to control it. I knew you'd make it better, so I came home to you. Please, make it better."

"Okay." She takes his hand and places it underneath her dress and on top of her lacy panties.

He feels like a monster as he slips his fingers under the waistband and pulls until the elastic snaps.

Bella winces.

"I'm sorry," he says, calming down.

Hurting her is equal to hurting himself. He would never want to bring her pain.

"It's okay, Honey. I'm fine." She pulls him down and lets him take control of her mouth.

He's almost feral, but his hands are gentle. One underneath her dress and one tangled in her hair, controlling her head and deepening his kisses. He finds her soft curls and presses into her wet heat.

Bella mewls and her hips lift up from just the slightest touch of his thumb swiping across her clit. "Edward."

He slides one finger inside her, and fuck, she's so tight.

"I love you, Sugar," he says against her mouth. "You're so fucking perfect."

"You're perfect." She moans, moving against his hand. "Keep going. Please."

"You never have to beg for my love," he tells her, adding another finger, filling her and loving her. He can't help but imagine how she'll feel around him when they're ready for that step.

"I love you." She gasps when he adds another finger, stretching her pussy and curling his fingers until he finds the exact spot that he knows will drive her wild.

And it does.

Bella comes undone with a muffled scream, right in his fucking ear, but he couldn't care less. He continues to work her until she comes back down to earth before pulling his hand out from under her dress.

Bella lays boneless, running her hands along his back and whispering her love for him over and over.

Edward lifts his fingers to his mouth and tastes her for the first time.

She stares at him slack-jawed and is slightly confused when he groans. He knew she would taste divine.

Bella pulls him down for a passionate kiss and licks his bottom lip, tasting herself on his tongue.

"That was ..." she starts when they pull away, both breathless.

"Exactly what I needed." He kisses her once more and settles next to her. "Thank you, Sugar."

"Do you want me to help you out?" Bella asks and reaches for his zipper.

Edward shakes his head.

"No. Everything is perfect." He yawns against her neck.

Bella pulls a knit blanket off the back of the couch and curls up against Edward's chest.

They whisper softly back and forth, sharing sweet kisses and then she yawns.

Edward's had a really rough day, and Bella just came harder than ever, so it's no surprise when they fall asleep together, cuddled up on her small couch underneath the blanket.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"Honey," Bella whispers softly in his ear, bringing Edward out of what was a wonderful nap.

"Yeah, Sugar?" he asks, sleepily.

"It's getting late. I need to use the bathroom, and then I'll make us some sandwiches for dinner. You gotta let me up."

They untangle their arms and legs until Bella is able to climb over him.

She kisses his forehead. "Just rest. I'll come and get you when the food is done."

He nods and pulls the blanket up to his shoulders but doesn't go back to sleep. Instead, Edward listens to Bella return, and then retreats into the kitchen. He can hear her humming Christmas songs as she works and can't help but get up. He stands, leaning against the doorway, loving the big smile on her face while she does such a simple task.

"You're so fucking beautiful," he says.

Bella's head snaps up with a light blush forming high on her cheeks. "I'm glad you think so."

He gives her a toothy grin and walks over, wrapping his arms around her middle. "I don't think so. I know so. Are you still not wearing any panties under there?"

"No. I forgot." Bella turns her head to the side and kisses his cheek. "You turned my brain to mush."

"I'm glad I could do that for you."

"I am glad you did."

"I don't want to overwhelm you, but we need to talk about some stuff before tomorrow. I want you to be informed and maybe give me some advice because I have no idea what to do."

"Okay. Take these to the living room, and I'll grab some drinks. We can talk while we eat."

They're sitting on the couch, a bag of chips between them and a plate of sandwiches on the table, when Bella asks what's going on.

"You already know that my parents will be here tomorrow. Rosalie has decided that I need to pick them up instead of staying here with you," he starts.

"Okay. So, I'll just be here ... waiting." Bella's voice trembles.

Edward immediately wants to go out and run over his sister with his car for doing this to them. More specifically for doing this to Bella.

"Rosalie also informed me that they've already started converting their guest room into a nursery, so she doesn't have any room for them." He tosses his plate onto the table and turns to Bella. "No hotel or motel, for that matter, is going to have a vacancy this close to Christmas, so I'm going to have to bring them back to my place. I wasn't planning for this to happen. I don't want to overwhelm you with them, but I don't have any other ideas."

Bella takes a moment, her uneaten sandwich hanging limply in her hand.

"I'll just ... I don't know what I'll do. I can't think of anything to help you. I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, Sugar. I just didn't want to blindside you when I showed up tomorrow with my parents in tow. The crappy thing is that I'm going to be sleeping on a pallet on the floor in my guest bedroom because I only have a loveseat. But it'll be worth it if you're still okay going forward with our plans."

"Um. Okay. One thing at a time."

She contemplates for a while, going over all the information he's just given her.

"I think I can handle your parents being next door, but I'll be more comfortable if I keep my door locked. I know you've prepared your mom, but I won't be able to handle a surprise visit."

Edward nods.

He has a key, so that's not a big deal. He doubts his mother would just burst into Bella's home unannounced, but he also knows she's excited to meet his girlfriend. Anything could happen, really.

He's not willing to take any chances, so they'll need to be prepared for anything.

Bella struggles to find words, and he starts to worry.

"All right, we've got that settled. What would you say about staying the night tonight?" she asks after a few minutes.

"Yeah. I mean, at least we know the couch is comfy."

"No. I meant with me. Maybe if we can get through tonight, you can stay here while your parents are in town."

Edward is shocked. "Are you sure?"

Bella nods, sets her food on the table, and climbs onto his lap.

Knowing that she's not wearing anything underneath her dress has him thinking dirty thoughts. "Sugar, are you asking me to stay the night so you can seduce me?"

Her face turns a brilliant shade of red, and she tilts her head to the side, pulling her lip between her teeth. "So what if I was?"

Edward pulls her lip free and runs his thumb over the marred flesh. "I would say hell yeah but only if you're sure?"

"It's only fair, Honey. You got to touch me, and now I want to touch you." She kisses him softly and pulls away with a sly smile. "So, go get some pajamas because I'm not quite ready for naked sleepovers yet. Meet me in the bedroom."

She climbs to her feet, straightens her dress, and starts for the stairs, leaving a shocked Edward sitting on the couch.

When he finally snaps out of it, he scrambles out the door and into his house, tearing through his dresser to find a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. He almost lands on his ass trying to step into the pants and runs into the door jamb pulling the shirt over his head.

Edward slows himself down, not wanting to overwhelm her with his exuberance. He makes sure all the windows and doors are locked and everything is cleaned up from their dinner before taking the stairs two at a time.

Bella's door is ajar, and he pushes it open to find her lying in the middle of the bed, wearing a pair of barely there cotton shorts and a tank top. Her face is freshly washed, and her eyes are clouded with lust.

He knows those eyes.

He loves those eyes.

She smiles wide and pats the spot next to her.

"Come to me, Honey."

He follows her instruction, but before he can pull her into his arms, Bella holds her hand up.

"Wait. I think we need to talk about what happened earlier. It was great and everything, but you were kind of scary. Should we rearrange things so Rose and Em spend time with your parents separately from us?"

"No. I told Rosalie that I wasn't going to let her ruin our first Christmas together. The two of us are going to have a talk after the holiday though. She's constantly riding my ass, and it's my kitchen. I can't let this go on anymore. She's making me miserable. She's making me hate my job."

Bella frowns. "I'm sorry, Honey."

"Don't be, Sugar. I think I'm going to have to dissolve the partnership. We should have never tried to make this work in the first place."

Her eyes widen. "Edward, that's a big deal."

He shrugs.

"Not really. I'm the majority owner of The Bakery, so I'll just buy her out and keep the front of the house staff we already have. I'm sure they'd love more hours. I'll hire an accountant to work the books."

"Do me a favor, okay? Think about this after your parents head back home when the fight isn't so fresh. I don't want you to do something drastic. Do I think the two of you need to sit down and hash everything out? Yes. Because if you keep coming home to me like you did tonight, I'll wait until she pops the kid out and kick her ass."

Edward chuckles, and she finally lets him pull her onto his lap.

"So our first sleepover. Should we put on face masks and braid each other's hair?" he jokes.

"I do have some peel-off masks, but you'd probably pass out from the pain with all this scruff." She rubs his cheek. "And while you do need a haircut, I don't think I could braid it. Besides, we're adults. Adult sleepovers are different."

"Hmm, really? How so?"

Bella nods and presses her lips to his forehead and whispers softly. "Take off your pants, Honey."

Edward just stares at her.

"It's only fair. I didn't have any pants on earlier." She wiggles her eyebrows and pulls at the drawstring.

He lets her remove his sweats and watches Bella try really hard not to blatantly stare at his dick, but her eyes dart down to his lap and then away while her face is flaming red.

"Sugar, give me back my pants. We don't have to do this right now," he tells her, reaching for his sweats, but Bella pulls them out of his grasp.

"No. I'm sorry. It's just ... you're the first"—she gestures to his crotch—"I've ever seen up close and personally."

"Huh?"

"He always insisted that the lights be off, pitch black. I never ... did anything." She holds his pants away from his grasp. "I don't want to talk about him right now. Let me have this, please."

Edward nods and laces his fingers behind his head. He'll let her explore, and he'll love every second of it. He's so hard the tip of his dick is almost touching his stomach.

Bella's hand hesitates, reaches forward, and pulls back.

"Just touch me, Sugar," Edward croaks. "As long as you don't try to bend it in half, there's really no wrong way to do this. Trust me."

She smiles and takes him in her soft, warm hand.

Edward's hips rise of their own accord, making him slide inside her grasp.

It's like velvet, the feel of her skin on his.

"Lick your palm, Sugar," he instructs.

Bella does and her hand returns, slightly lubricated by her saliva. She starts at the base, twisting her wrist as she makes her way to the very tip.

Like a fucking pro.

"Fuck, Bella." The back of his head hits the headboard with a dull thud.

Her hand continues to work him as she climbs up, resting on this thighs.

"Kiss me, Honey," she tells him.

He moans into her mouth, thrusting up as her hand steadily moves over him.

"You're so hard. I can't wait to taste you," she whispers in his ear, licking the space behind it.

Edward groans.

"I know you'll be the greatest teacher. You'll show me how to use my mouth to bring you pleasure."

"Bella."

He's close. Her words aren't helping him maintain his composure.

"You're so big. I wonder how you'll feel inside me. I'll be so full of you." She moans. "I'll feel you for days."

Edward loses control without warning. He comes all over his stomach making Bella's eyes widen in surprise.

"Fuck, Sugar." He pulls her to him and kisses her hard on the mouth, his tongue assaulting hers in the best way.

"Your stuff is all over my shorts." She giggles into his lips.

"That's all right, I was planning on them being on the floor in a second anyway." Edward all but throws Bella to the foot of the bed and pulls her shorts off in one quick move.

She's too shocked to fight it.

When her legs are dangling off the side, he kneels on the floor in front of her, spreading her thighs and pulling her toward him.

She doesn't question his motive until he throws her legs over his shoulders.

"New experience, Sugar," he tells her, running his nose along her slit.

"Fuck. Yes." She gasps.

Edward grips her thighs and places his mouth on her for the first time.

His plan was to make it soft and sweet, but never thought she'd turn into an animal, taking control, gripping his hair and bucking against his face until she's squeezing her thighs together, riding out her orgasm before falling back, gasping for breath. She throws one arm over her eyes and clutches one tit as she comes back down to earth.

Edward wipes his mouth on her thigh before climbing up.

"Well, how did I do?"

"Are you serious?" she asks with a shaky laugh. "I can't feel my body right now. The only word I can come up with is fucktastic. It was fucktastic, Honey."

They laugh, clean themselves up a bit, and find their clothes before falling back into bed.

"We totally got this, Sugar," he tells her, hugging her tightly against him. "And if you're uncomfortable in any way, you tell me, and we'll just lock the door and spend the next four days together. Okay?"

Bella nods, falling asleep, and after all of tonight's activities, it's no surprise that she's exhausted.

**a lot of people suffer from seasonal depression. I am the opposite and I'm loosely basing Sugar off of my experience/struggle so no she isn't magically cured of all her problems. **


	23. The Hermit 23

**23**

**The Hermit**

"All right, Bella," she tells her reflection. "You got this."

Bella dabs a bit of concealer on the stress pimple that popped up after Edward left to go pick up his parents from the airport.

Just to be safe, before he left, he pressed half of one of her little white pills in between her lips.

"You aren't weak, Sugar. This'll just help you relax a little until I get back home to you."

She nodded and accepted the pill.

He's right, needing a little help to get her through this doesn't make her weak. She doesn't feel guilty admitting that.

Bella is still nervous, sure, but she's also excited to meet the people who created and raised the man she's fallen in love with. Edward's taught her what it's like to love and be loved unconditionally. How can she not be curious?

This is a big step she's making, and Bella can't wait to share everything that has transpired with Zafrina when she sees her.

She finds herself on the couch, knee bouncing like a jackhammer, with one of Edward's favorite shows playing on the television while she knits a set of baby booties.

She's still annoyed with Rose for putting everyone through all of this at the last minute, especially after she'd confided in her about how needing to be in control of the situation was key. Bella definitely doesn't feel in control right now. Edward is supposed to be here, keeping her calm and making sure she doesn't scrub the finish off of her kitchen counters. Instead of stress cleaning her already impeccable house, Bella pulled out her basket of yarn and started making tiny socks, using a soft yellow that almost matches the boxes at The Bakery. A bakery that Rose might not even be a part of by the time the baby is born if she and Edward can't find common ground.

Bella wasn't lying when she told Edward that he scared her.

While she hopes that it won't happen if it's decided that he and Rose will dissolve the partnership, she'll support him. One way or another, she will always have his back.

Bella has just finished her second bootie when she hears multiple car doors slam.

The nervous knot in her stomach tightens, but she slides her coat on and stomps into her boots before throwing her door open.

Edward leads the way, followed by an older couple.

Bella smiles, noticing that Rose takes after their father while Edward looks more like his mother. They're both equally beautiful but that's not surprising.

"Sugar," Edward greets.

He's got the goofiest grin on his face, and she reminds herself that she's the luckiest girl in the universe.

"Honey."

If he didn't have his hands full of suitcases, she'd throw herself into his arms. She could really use one of his hugs right now. Instead, Bella finds herself face to face with Mrs. Cullen.

The older woman is smiling, giving her son's girlfriend an honest once over. Her hand twitches forward and then back to her side, reminding Bella of the first time she met Rose.

She takes pity and holds her hand out. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Cullen. I guess you already know that I'm Bella."

"Damn. Sorry." Edward laughs. "Can't help it that my girl's so beautiful I forgot to introduce everyone. Mom, Dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is my mother Esme and my father Carlisle."

Esme grasps Bella's hand cautiously.

"Call me Mrs. Cullen again and we'll have problems. It's so wonderful to finally meet you after all this time. I have to say my son is right. You are absolutely breathtaking."

Bella blushes from head to toe, suddenly taking great interest in her barely used boots.

Apparently, Edward forgot to share the fact that she isn't used to compliments.

"Oh, dear," Esme frets. "I didn't mean to embarrass you. I fear that Ro got her subtleness from me. We both tend to speak before we think."

"It's fine, Esme." Bella forces a smile. "I'm sure you've heard about Rose's plans to leave her husband, steal me from Edward, and have us raise the baby together."

Carlisle chuckles. "Wouldn't surprise me. Rosalie can never make up her mind. Imagine our surprise when they called to tell us about the grandbaby. It doesn't surprise me that you're making my daughter consider switching teams. You are very beautiful."

Bella laughs and shakes his hand, surprised when he lifts her hand to his mouth and kisses her knuckles.

Her blush returns.

"Dad, stop macking on my girlfriend." Edward growls.

Bella feels herself wanting to drag him upstairs for a little fun. After last night and again this morning, she craves him.

His touch.

His mouth.

His everything.

"Simmer down, Sugar. Not in front of my parents," he whispers in her ear. "I'll deal with you later."

"Can't wait," she replies cheekily. "Now, go get your parents settled, and I'll order some take-out. Is pizza good for everyone?"

Esme informs Bella that she and Carlisle prefer all the meats, aside from anchovies, before they pile into Edward's townhouse.

"Edward, she's absolutely perfect for—" The door shuts.

Bella calls their favorite pizza joint. It seems as though everyone and their mother is ordering pizza tonight. They tell her that it will be an hour and a half wait for delivery, so she places the order.

Bella contemplates how she's going to keep Edward's parents entertained until the food arrives. Surely, he'll have an idea. She doesn't think Esme's the type to watch zombie shows—Edward's new obsession, so that's out.

She's double checking to make sure she has everything for baking and decorating gingerbread cookies when the front door opens.

"Sugar?"

"In the kitchen, Honey!" she calls.

He rounds the corner, presses her up against the pantry, and attacks her mouth.

"Fuck, I've missed you." He growls, grabbing her ass with both hands and pressing his lower half into hers.

"We can't do this right now." Bella laughs. "You're parents."

"They're taking showers to wash the grime from the flight off. When will the pizza be here?"

She answers him at the same time Edward shoves his hand down the front of her pants, palming her.

"You've been wet since the front porch, haven't you?"

Bella moans and nods. "You growled. It was so sexy. It's all your fault. Keep going."

Edward chuckles darkly. "I should leave you high and dry. Make you wait until tonight."

Bella pants. "You promised I would never have to beg for your love."

"Using my words against me. I can't believe you."

He finally takes pity on her, and Bella muffles her screams against his neck, biting into his flesh and paranoid that somehow his parents will know what they're up to.

"We're both adults, Sugar." Edward kisses her lips. "You totally bit me. My little vampire."

"Wash your hands and help me make a salad."

"Not a fucking chance."

Bella tries to argue as he drags her up the stairs and into her bedroom.

"Honey, we don't have time."

Surely, he doesn't expect their first time to be a quicky before his parents pop in.

"Sugar, we aren't fucking. But it's only fair. I put my hands on you, now you'll put your hands on me."

Bella smirks. "Taking my words and twisting them for your own benefit. That's pretty diabolical, Honey."

They hide out in the bathroom, and Bella pulls Edward's pants down to his ankles.

"I cannot handle dinner with my parents with a massive hard-on, Sugar."

She licks her palm and grasps him tightly.

"Something we agree on. You are definitely massive."

He chokes on a laugh, groaning and falling back against the sink.

Bella watches her hand as it glides across his erection. The small bead of precum leaking out of the tip catches her attention and gives her an idea.

"Hey, Honey?"

"Hmm?"

"Look at me. Now."

Edward glances down.

She can tell he's trying to hold off.

"You know what isn't fair? You get to taste me, and I don't get to taste you."

Edward doesn't get the chance to comment before Bella leans forward and swipes her tongue across the head of his dick.

He's salty, not delicious but not completely terrible.

She doesn't anticipate Edward's reaction. She certainly didn't think he'd come immediately, right in her face.

"Fuck, Sugar." He lifts her up and grabs a towel.

"Wow." She gasps in shock.

"I'm so fucking sorry. I didn't think you would ... that I would. I'm so embarrassed."

"Honey, it's fine," Bella takes the towel from him and turns toward the mirror. "Damn, I'm going to have to change my shirt. Do you think your parents will notice?"

"I don't know. How are you okay with this? I just ..."

"Edward, just stop. It's fine. Was it surprising? You betcha. But I'm not dead or injured, so chill out."

He doesn't have time to argue because his parents arrive.

Bella sends him downstairs so she can change her shirt.

"Go ahead and get started on the salad. The pizza should be here soon."

He leaves her with a kiss and a genuine smile.

Bella doesn't know if it's possible to fall more in love with him. She can't wait to find out.

**There's a sneaky milestone hidden among the other ones in this chapter that isn't mentioned and probably unnoticeable. Bella made a phone call without a second thought right after she willingly shook hands with two new strangers :) our girl is doing pretty great right now**


	24. The Hunk 24

**24**

**The Hunk**

Edward loves Christmas.

Seeing as it's their first Christmas together, he wants to make it one Bella will never forget. He's got a lot of work to do, and he's going to need everyone's help in executing it.

He starts on Christmas Eve morning. Ridding Bella of her shorts is the easy part. Fitting himself between her thighs without waking her up is the hard part. Once he's in place, he leans down and whispers in her ear. "Sugar."

"No. Too early. Go back to bed," Bella grumbles.

"I bet I can give you a reason to wake up."

"I bet you can go get a bottle of lotion out of the bathroom and take care of that reason."

Edward chuckles, his thumb finding her clit.

"Not me, silly."

"Hmm. Fine, do what you want, I guess." She tries hard not to smile but fails miserably.

Edward strokes her nice and slow while whispering filthy things in her ear.

"All I'd have to do is push my boxers down a little, and I'd be buried inside your tight pussy."

He bites her nipple through the thin fabric of her nightshirt, and Bella molds herself to him.

"Honey," is a soft plea falling from her lips.

"I know we aren't ready yet, but I can still fantasize, and it would be rude if I didn't share."

He's three fingers deep when he whispers in her ear again. "I dream about taking you from behind. My hands on your perfect hips, controlling how fast or how slow we go. I'll go so slow it'll drive you insane. I think that's the only time you'll ever have to beg for my love, Sugar."

"Edward."

"Not now, Bella. I'm having fun." He chuckles as his hand speeds up. "Hmm. How about the shower? I want you soaking wet from head to toe. I'll kneel down and toss your leg over my shoulder. You'll thank those little rubber ducky stickers on the bottom of the tub that make it slip-proof. I'll bury my face in your pussy until you're screaming and begging me to just fuck you already ... and I will, Sugar. I'll fuck you so good."

Bella's screams are unintelligible and so loud Edward worries for a second that his parents might hear her. Nah, there's a lot of concrete and plaster separating them ... hopefully.

Shrugging to himself, he crawls up Bella's body and kisses her slowly, letting her suck on his tongue. He loves that she loves to taste herself.

His girl might be a little kinky. He can't wait to find out.

"Hmm. Good morning, Sugar."

"I'll say. Good morning, Honey." She smiles.

"How are you feeling?"

"Pretty damn good at the moment. You?"

"I'm so happy. I love Christmas, and I love you. I get both things I love all in one place."

Bella rubs the side of his scruffy face. "How did I get so lucky? What are the chances that someone like you moved to this town of all places and right next door? You've changed my life so irrevocably." Her eyes glisten with emotion.

"Luck didn't have anything to do with it. We have fate working for us. My life was empty before we met. I've been waiting for you, and without a doubt, you are my life now."

Their moment is interrupted by Bella's doorbell ringing.

Edward groans. "That would be my mom. She's very excited to do the whole girl-time cookie-baking thing. Are you sure you'll be okay without me?"

"I like your mom. She's easy to be around, and I know Rose. Hopefully, Esme can bake better than your sister though because I'm going to need all the help I can get." Bella jumps up and starts for the bathroom.

"Where do you think I learned everything I know?"

"I don't know. School?" she calls.

"Smartass."

Edward gets dressed and opens the door for his bright-eyed and bushy-tailed mother.

"Edward, sweetheart. Did the two of you oversleep? I didn't wake you up, did I?"

"Calm down, Ma. We were up, just talking about the day and shit-stuff."

Esme's eyes narrow, but she doesn't say anything. He's an adult—he can say what he wants, but at the same time, he doesn't like to be disrespectful.

"Will Bella be down soon? I can't tell you how excited I am to get started on the cookies. Did you already close the blinds in the kitchen?"

Edward nods. "All the supplies are sitting in my guest room. Dad and I are going to get started instead of waiting for Emmett. Who knows what time that blockhead is going to roll out of bed?" he jokes.

"I highly doubt you'll be doing any strenuous work, but what you are doing sounds wonderful. She's going to love it." Edward's mom pats his cheek, making him feel like a kid again.

"She's going to love what?" Bella asks, bouncing down the stairs.

Edward tries not to watch her tits. He shouldn't be pervy with his mother present.

"It's Christmas. You don't get to ask questions, Sugar."

"But, Honey." She gives him her best pout.

Edward has to look away. "Don't you Honey me. It's Christmas. Let me have a little secrecy, please?"

"The two of you are so sweet you make my teeth ache." Esme sighs.

"Aren't we though?" He laughs. "All right, give me a kiss, Sugar. I'll see you in a couple hours."

Bella gives him what he wants before dragging his mom to the kitchen.

"Esme, I hope you're ready because I've got enough supplies to make an entire gingerbread colony."

Edward smiles when he hears his mom clap with excitement.

"I willingly accept your challenge, Bella."

Edward goes to find his dad and wait for Emmett.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"Em, drop the staple gun."

"Come on, Carlisle. It's hard to fuck anything up with a staple—shit."

Edward rolls his eyes and stomps through the snow. He snatches the staple gun out of his brother-in-law's hands and points to the windows.

"You better stay quiet. If you ruin this for me, so help me God. Rosalie won't have to worry about offing you because I'll do it myself."

Emmett throws his hands in the air, and one is now sporting a staple in its palm.

"Lips are sealed."

They've been at it for hours, so they're all freezing at this point.

Edward can't feel his toes or his nose, but seeing the look on her face will make it all worth it.

"Edward, I think that was the last of 'em," his dad says.

"Really? Are you sure? I thought I got more than that?"

"Son, there's plenty. I don't think we could fit any more if we tried. Let's get something hot to drink, and then we'll go meet our girls."

They stomp the snow off of their boots before entering Edward's house, and he realizes just how much time he spends with Bella. Edward's cupboards and fridge are sparse.

"Uh. Sorry, guys. I have coffee but no cream," he says, closing the fridge.

He'll deal with the moldy take-out boxes later ...

"I guess that will have to do," Emmett says as if he has another choice.

Carlisle agrees.

While the coffee is brewing, Edward finds clean cups and searches for the sugar.

He smiles like a loon when he finds the small Tupperware bowl Bella had lent him the night she first opened her door for him all the way.

After they warm up, the men decide to head next door, planning to devour the gingerbread village the girls were supposed to have been working on.

Edward walks in and calls out for Bella just like always. All he can hear is giggling and squealing coming from the kitchen.

"At least, they aren't at each other's throats," Emmett comments, making his way to the kitchen table that's completely filled with cookies.

Bella is rubbing dark blue icing all over Rosalie's face.

"I cannot believe you just did that." His sister laughs, picking up a piping bag filled with pink icing.

"Rosalie, please. I didn't mean to." Bella backs up to the pantry.

"You didn't mean to smash a bunch of icing on my face? I highly doubt that."

"What the hell is going on here?" Edward laughs.

"Honey, your sister is trying to give me an icing facial," Bella cries, pointing to his sister.

"She just ruined my makeup."

"You totally put a spoonful of cookie dough in my cleavage!"

"Hey now, what's this I hear about tits and cookie dough?" Emmett asks, spewing crumbs everywhere.

Edward punches his brother-in-law in the arm.

"Well, if they weren't hanging out, begging for something sweet, I wouldn't have been tempted." Rosalie giggles.

Both girls are laughing to the point of tears while Edward's mom just looks on.

"I lost control of this a long time ago." She sighs. "Edward, you never should have introduced them to one another."

"It was all Bella's idea." He shrugs, sliding past his sister so he can see his girl. "Hi, Sugar."

"Hi, Honey. I made you a cookie," she tells him, biting her lip in an effort to hide a mischievous smile.

"I saw that you made about twenty dozen cookies."

"No. She literally made you a cookie." Rosalie says as their mother wipes her face off with damp paper towels.

Bella pulls him to the table and points to a cookie in the middle. It's a caricature of Edward, complete with scruff and—

"Sugar, why would you decide to showcase my serial-killer smile?"

Bella giggles. "Because it's my favorite."

"Just for that, I'm not giving you your Christmas Eve gift."

"Oh, come on. I've been waiting all day," she cries.

Edward leans in and whispers in her ear.

"You better be glad my entire family is here."

"Oh. So my gift is that kind of present?"

"Bella, stop looking at my brother like you're about to hump his leg. Ed, get over here and decorate your cookie for Bella."

"Oh, no. There's a reason we don't sell decorated goods at the bakery." He shakes his head. "I am not even one percent as talented as Bella in this department."

"Come on, Honey." Bella giggles and whispers into his ear. "Decorate my cookie, and I'll let you eat mine later."

"Sugar," Edward warns, pulling her closer.

"Edward, stop trying to hump your girlfriend in front of company," Emmett chides.

Bella pulls out of his embrace and pushes him toward the counter with all the decorating supplies.

Edward messes up multiple times before he finally decides to give up on portraying Bella and go a different route.

"Aw, I love it, Honey." Bella smiles.

Where Edward lacks in drawing, he more than makes up for it in penmanship. Sure, his heart is a little wobbly. But the words are perfect if he says so himself.

Sugar + Honey 4-EVER


	25. The Hermit 25

**25**

**The Hermit**

Everyone has gone home for the night with plans to return sometime around noon tomorrow.

Bella finds herself nauseous and uncomfortable. "How could you let me eat so many cookies?" she whines, pressing her head into the pillow on Edward's lap. "You should know by now that I have absolutely no self-control."

Edward chuckles and continues stroking her hair. "Sugar, I didn't force them down your throat."

Bella sighs. "It's not your fault. In all honesty, I blame my parents."

Edward leans up until she can see his face. "How so?"

Bella turns until they are face to face and lifts one hand to rub the side of his scruffy face. "It's probably no surprise that Alice was always the family favorite." She shrugs. "While she got toys, new dresses, and candy for Christmas, I got passive aggressive gifts. Clothes a size too small and a stocking full of fruit. One year, in my early teens, my parents even got me a gym membership."

Edward's face is flushed with anger.

"Alice is only a year younger than me, so of course, she noticed the difference. She cornered me one year, asking why I wasn't excited about the up and coming holiday. Why didn't I wake up early and rush downstairs to open presents? I can't remember what I told her. I just wanted her to have a good Christmas, so I made something up.

"It was the same year that my mom started smacking my hand away from anything with carbs or sugar. I can't remember a Christmas from my childhood that didn't end with me in tears."

Bella reaches up to wipe a stray tear from Edward's cheek before it can fall.

"I'm not telling you this to make you sad, Honey. I'm telling you because today was the best Christmas Eve I've ever had. Alice has tried so hard to make up for the bad memories, and I do miss her terribly, but spending time with your family …" Bella whispers. "It was just nice to be accepted and not judged the entire time."

Edward bends and kisses her passionately, leaving her breathless.

"I can't wait. I was going to hold out until five minutes before midnight, but I don't want to anymore."

"Huh?"

Edward pushes her to her feet. "Get bundled up. I'm giving you your Christmas Eve gift early."

Bella's stomach still aches from her sugar overdose, but she's excited about the present he's been hinting around about all day.

When he deems her ready for the outdoors, Edward leads her through the house until they're standing in front of her back door.

"I didn't think about it. We've been in the front yard, but we haven't tried this yet." He frowns. "Will you be okay?"

Bella nods behind the scarf he wrapped around her face.

"It'll be fine, Honey. Show me my present."

It's been at least two years since the door has been used, so it takes some effort for Edward to get it open. The back yard is pitch black, and Bella can't see a thing as he leads her toward the very middle. She can barely make out his body, but she can tell he's pulling something dark out of his pocket.

"Do you trust me, Sugar?"

"Of course, you know I do," she says confidently.

He turns Bella around and wraps a piece of fabric over her eyes, asking if she's okay before she hears his retreating boots crunching in the snow.

Bella bites her lip in anticipation.

She's been trying to figure out what he got her all day, but his hints did nothing but confuse her.

When Edward returns, he pulls her scarf down and kisses her softly.

"You've only ever had bad memories of my favorite holiday, and that just won't do. It's our first Christmas together, and I wanted to make it one you'll never forget. I honestly don't know how I'll top this one, but I'll spend the rest of my life trying."

"Take off my blindfold," Bella tells him, reaching out and finding his shoulders. "Show me, Honey."

"Wait. I have a whole speech prepared, but you make my head spin. I guess I'll just have to give you the Cliff Notes." He licks her bottom lip but pulls away before she can reciprocate. "Remember when you told me how you and Alice used to drive around looking at Christmas lights?"

Bella nods and realizes that he can't see her in the dark.

Before she can answer him out loud, he reaches for the knot in her blindfold.

"I know we aren't ready to bring back that tradition, yet, so I figured if we can't go out that I could bring it to you. Merry Christmas, Sugar. Open your eyes."

Bella gasps when she finally sees her present. Edward has turned their shared backyard into a winter wonderland.

"Take a walk with me, Sugar." He grabs her hand, leading her down the candy cane pathway.

Tears blur her vision as she tries to take in every minute detail. Santa and his eight reindeer, elves, and a giant inflatable snow globe take up most of the space, but it's the thousands of twinkling Christmas lights strung up on anything stationary that is her favorite.

"Honey," she chokes out, gripping his hand. "This is perfect. I love it. I love you."

Edward smiles and points out a faux igloo in the corner. It's too small to climb inside, but it's cute. Bella wonders if she can convince him to keep everything up year-round.

"I'm glad you like it. Emmett and my dad helped me set up while the girls kept you distracted with the cookies. And I'll have you know that my brother-in-law managed to get through the day without an accident aside from a staple in his palm."

Bella tears her eyes away from a sleigh and turns to him for the first time since he took her blindfold off. "I love it, really. But you blew my Christmas Eve gift for you out of the water. Kind of literally, if you think about it."

Edward looks at her with a confused grin. "Hmm. That's got me curious."

"Yeah. You did all of this." She waves her hand around. "I was just going to try giving you a blowjob tonight."

He chokes on his tongue. "Sugar ..."

"Yeah, I know. You totally trumped my gift. How am I supposed to top this?"

Edward pulls her to him and squeezes her tight. "You don't have to top anything. I did this because I love you, and I want you to have only good memories of our first Christmas. The first of many more to come, if I have anything to say about it." He pulls down her scarf and presses his mouth to hers before pulling away with a goofy grin, the colorful lights twinkling in his pretty green eyes. "But if you want to try giving me a blowjob then by all means."

Bella laughs. "I'm getting cold. I wish we could stay out here all night. What would it take for me to talk you into keeping all of this up indefinitely?"

"Oh, you know I'd do anything for you."

"Right now." She smirks. "Right now, I think I would be really happy if you let me drag you upstairs and have my wicked way with you."

"Please, use me as your guinea pig. I'll gladly help you experiment." Edward pulls her into the house and removes her coat, practically ripping it at the seams in his haste. "I would love to be your teacher."

"I'm sure you would." Bella giggles, toeing off her boots and heading for the stairs.

He follows close behind, swatting her on the ass to get her to move faster.

In the blink of an eye, clothes are discarded, leaving a trail to the bed.

Edward is naked, resting against the headboard with a cocky smile and an erection pointing up toward the ceiling. He doesn't appear to be offended when Bella leaves her undershirt on.

She knows he loves her body, but the nagging voice in the back of her head keeps her from being completely naked in front of him.

It's at this moment that Bella realizes the voice sounds unmistakably like her mother's. This fact hits her like a punch to the gut.

"Sugar?"

If Edward has taught her anything since they met, it's that he loves her inside and out.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?" she replies, reaching for the hem of her shirt.

She's done letting her mother rule her life. She's an adult, and she can do whatever the fuck she wants.

She has her eyes closed as the fabric floats to the floor. She can hear Edward's breath hitch. Bella isn't sure if that's a good sign or a bad one.

"Sugar. Come up here."

She opens one eye and then the other.

If anything, Edward is harder than ever, leaking and mouth-watering as he takes in the sight of her bare tits for the first time.

He pats his thigh, and she shuffles forward until his erection is sandwiched between their naked bodies. His hands make a slow trail from her hips to her breasts, taking them in both hands.

"You're so fucking beautiful. I can't believe you're mine."

Edward pulls her in for an eager kiss, his tongue dominating hers and his hands finding her chest once again. He plucks her nipples and groans as she presses herself against him.

"Not that I don't love this." Bella gasps and pulls away for air. "We are here for your present."

He watches her crawl back down until she's eye to eye with his dick.

"How do I do this?"

"Just do what feels right, Sugar."

"No. This is my gift to you. You always let me be in control. Let me do this for you, please."

He nods and reaches for her hand.

"Grip the base, not too tightly. That'll be your control, and when I feel like I'm about to come, I'll tell you to squeeze a little tighter. That'll help me hold off."

"Why would you want to hold off? The whole idea of this is to bring you pleasure."

"Honestly? I almost blew my load when you took your shirt off. I'd really like to last more than thirty seconds."

Bella laughs, her warm breath blows over his lap, and Edward groans.

"Taste me."

She steels herself before leaning forward and running her tongue across the sensitive head, popping the tip into her mouth.

"Squeeze harder." Edward gasps, one of his hands tangling in her hair of its own accord, the other is fisted in the comforter.

Bella squeezes him at the base just like he showed her and moves her mouth down a little more before bringing it back up.

"Fuck, Sugar."

"Hmm…"

"FUCKING SQUEEZE!" he practically screams, thrusting until he hits the back of her throat. "I'm so sorry."

Bella pops him out of her mouth and frowns.

"Honey, I'm not made of glass. Fucking take control, and fuck my mouth."

Edward stares at her with his mouth gaping.

"I'm serious. I'm so wet." She licks the head of his dick. "I need some relief, so I'm going to be selfish. I'm going to need you to speed this up so you can make me come before I burst into a million pieces."

He nods and uses his hand in her hair as leverage to bring her mouth back down.

Bella takes him in and lets his erection slide down her throat until her lips meet her hand. Edward tells her to squeeze, but she's done letting him hold off. She feels like she's going to combust if she doesn't get what she needs soon.

Instead of squeezing his dick, she lets go and moves her hands to his strong thighs, taking him in until she's kissing his pubic bone.

Before Bella can slide back up, Edward's hold on her hair tightens, he thrusts deep and explodes down her throat.

Bella, having no warning, coughs and sputters, pulling away from him as she fights for air.

"Fuck, Sugar."

She glares and clears her throat.

"If you start apologizing, I swear I'll kick you out, and you can go sleep on your floor."

She wipes her mouth on the back of her hand and climbs up his body.

"Is it okay if I kiss you?"

"Fuck, yeah."

Bella smiles against his mouth.

"You curse a lot when you're horny."

"Says the girl who told me to fuck her fucking mouth." Edward chuckles. "Now as great as my Christmas Eve gift was, I would really like one more thing before midnight."

Bella looks over at the alarm clock.

"You've got thirteen minutes, Mr. Cullen. What you choose to do with them is entirely up to you."

"I only need three, and then I think we'll take a shower before bed."

Bella bites her lip. It's one thing to be naked in front of Edward, but naked and wet?

"Stop right there, Sugar, and ask me what I plan on doing in three minutes."

She smirks. "What do you plan on doing in three or two minutes now? Time is ticking." She points to the alarm clock.

"Challenge accepted."

He situates himself between her legs.

"I'm going to make you come on my face in less than two minutes."

"I don't know if you…" Bella's words are cut off by a guttural moan.

True to his words, Edward gives her an orgasm with thirty seconds to spare.

They spend the first twenty minutes of their first Christmas together in the shower until the hot water runs out.


	26. The Hunk 26

**26**

**The Hunk**

"Um, Honey." Bella shakes Edward awake.

It feels like they just went to bed, and he's not ready for the day to begin just yet.

He burrows his head in his pillow and gives a mumbled "no".

"Honey, please wake up."

Her pleading voice has him blinking the sleep out of his eyes. He's confused to find her leaning over him, freshly showered, in a set of cotton pajamas and sporting a red face.

"Hmm. You look warm. Come cuddle with me." He rolls and opens his arms, but she doesn't move. "It's Christmas. We're allowed to sleep in, Sugar. Let's make it a tradition of our own. Come on."

"I can't." Her blush deepens. "We can't."

Edward sits up.

"What's going on?" he asks curiously.

"Istartedmyperiod," Bella rushes out, her hands covering her face.

"You what? I'm sorry. I'm still half asleep."

"I'm on my period. I started this morning," she mumbles.

"Why are you so embarrassed?"

Bella looks at him like he's grown a second head.

"Because I started my period this morning," she explains slowly as if she's talking to a child.

"And that means we can't cuddle and sleep for another hour because?"

Bella's scowls. "I wasn't expecting it, and I need to do things, so I need you to go sleep on the couch or you can take the daybed in the guest room. You can't stay here."

"Bella, I don't know what you were raised to believe. Hell, I wouldn't even try considering who your parents are. Just because you're on your period—a natural occurrence, by the way—doesn't mean we can't share a bed. It doesn't work that way."

"I know that, Edward. I'm not an idiot. Please, just trust me on this and get out of bed and go downstairs. I've already put some blankets out for you."

"No."

"No?"

"Nope. I'm not leaving unless it's to grab you some painkillers and a heating pad. Screw one hour, they can wait for two. I'll text everyone now."

Bella snatches his phone out of his hands and all but slams it onto the nightstand.

"Edward, get out of my bed and go downstairs. I'm not asking you."

"Fuck that, Sugar. You're acting irrationally."

"And you're acting dumb. I bled all over the bedding, okay! I need you to leave so I can clean everything up." Her blush returns ten-fold. "Please, just go downstairs."

She watches him roll off the side of the bed and tries to block him from looking until he reaches the door, but Edward has other plans. He sidesteps her and starts tearing the sheets off the corners of the bed.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking care of you, whether you like it or not. Pick out some new sheets and sit in that chair. Don't move." He points to the chair by the window. "I'm going to throw these in the wash. Don't argue."

Bella nods and moves to her closet.

Edward doesn't understand why this is such a big deal for Bella. He grew up with Rosalie and understands that this sort of thing happens about once a month. Bella acts as if he were going to run away screaming at the sight of a little, well, slightly more than a little blood.

Once he's got the laundry started, he takes the steps two at a time and finds Bella shaking out the fitted sheet.

"I told you to sit down," he scolds and moves to help her.

"You said you wanted to sleep for a little while longer, so I figured I'd help. I also texted your family. We have two hours." She grimaces in pain.

"Where's your kit?"

"My what?"

"Rosalie had a kit when we were growing up. Midol, tampons, pads, a heating pad."

"Oh. Well, I don't have a kit, but I keep everything in the bottom drawer in the bathroom."

Edward makes her lie down and grabs the essentials. Once the heating pad is plugged in and resting across her abdomen and she's swallowed a couple of pain relievers, he slides into bed facing her.

Bella scoots closer to him until the heating pad is sandwiched between them.

"I'm sorry for freaking out like that. This was the first time anything like this has ever happened to me before. I didn't know how you would react. Thank you for taking such good care of me."

"Anytime, Sugar. I'll always take care of you. Always." He kisses her nose and massages her lower back. "Please don't be embarrassed to talk to me about things like this. I love you."

"I love you too." She presses her mouth against his. "But you have to tell me what you thought my parents taught me about my period."

"I don't fucking know, to be honest, but everything seems to stem from their shitty parenting, so I just figured this fell under one of their abusive tendencies."

They doze in and out, flipping the heating pad back on a few times until Edward's phone goes off.

"The wolves will descend in twenty-five minutes," Bella whispers into his lips. "I told everyone that pajamas were the dress code. Let's just hope your sister doesn't show up in lingerie in an effort to win my heart."

Edward grimaces.

"Ugh, Sugar. Don't talk about my sister in lingerie while we're making out, ever, ever again."

Bella's giggles are cut off by his teeth finding the soft flesh of her shoulder.

"We're back to hickeys again?" She moans, pressing herself into his mouth.

"Yup. I know if they're out in the open, you'll be embarrassed around my parents, so I could always give them to you in secret spots if you prefer."

Edward unbuttons her pajama top slowly and is still leaving tiny love bruises along her silky skin when his family arrives.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Luckily for Edward, his entire family shows up wearing pajamas similar to his and Bella's.

He's helping his mom mix rum into a bowl of eggnog when she brings up Bella's present.

"How did she like it, sweetheart?" she asks, stirring the concoction and lifting the spoon to taste it. "A little more."

"She loved it. We're trying to figure out how to keep it up indefinitely, but it was a big hit." Edward smiles. "I honestly have no idea how I'm going to be able to top this next year though. Definitely set the mark pretty high with this one."

Esme's eyes glisten. "You're serious when you talk about your future with her, aren't you?"

"Dead serious. I'm going to be here for every milestone and backslide she has whether she likes it or not. I'll be right next to her when she makes it to the end of the block. I'll be driving the car when we make our first trip around it, and I'll reap the benefits when I sneak her into the bakery to play in my kitchen."

Both Edward and his mother are surprised when Rosalie bursts into tears.

"Just ignore me. This baby has me all sorts of emotional." She sniffs, dropping a plate into the sink. "Joking aside, I think Bella is perfect for you, Ed. She's an amazingly strong woman, and I would love to call her my sister-in-law."

"Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. If that's where you two are headed with this conversation, I have to stop you right there. Bella and I aren't even remotely close to that sort of thing. Yet."

Edward has a plan. It's going to take some time and even more determination, but like most things involving Bella, it's going to be spectacular.

"Honey! Alice and Jasper want to say hi!" Bella calls from the living room.

Esme presses a glass of eggnog into her son's hand and pushes him out of the kitchen.

He passes the cup to his father, parked on the couch, his focus on "A Christmas Story".

Edward ignores his brother-in-law's pout and helps Bella out of the small desk chair, pulling her to sit on his lap. Bella's hand finds its way into the hair on the back of his neck, and he lightly massages her sore stomach. A throat clearing reminds them that they are here for the webcam and turn their attention back to Alice.

Alice's smile is a mile wide as she takes in their totally in love state.

"_We wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas and thank you for being there for Bella when we couldn't be."_

"Don't mention it, Alice," he tells her, pressing his lips into Bella's soft hair. "I would do anything for her, all she has to do is name it. How's Jasper's grandfather?"

Alice's smile falls.

"_Unfortunately, Grant passed early this morning surrounded by family and friends, and he went with a smile. He was ready to go home. Jasper's pretty torn up, but he knew it was coming. Grant only regained consciousness once after we got here, so they were able to say their goodbyes."_

Edward apologizes for their loss, and Bella asks when they'll be coming home.

"_It probably won't be before the New Year. The entire town wants to attend the service, so it's taking a while to plan."_ She smirks. "_I'd worry, but it seems that Edward's got you taken care of. I can't wait to hear about the insane lengths he'll go to make your first New Year together memorable."_

"He's taking the holiday off. We'll probably just stay in and watch the ball drop," Bella jokes.

"_Next year, I'll be dragging the two of you to one of the fourteen parties my company hosts, and you'll wish you still had an excuse to stay in. You just wait and see,"_ Alice threatens. "_Get back to your Christmas. Love you guys. SAY BYE JASPER!"_

"_BYE, JASPER!"_

"So I can't do anything special for New Year's?" Edward bounces Bella on his knee.

"Nope. We need a holiday off. You, me, some noisemakers, and Ryan Seacrest are about as wild as we're going to get." She stands up, but he pulls her back. "Honey, I need to help your mom and sister in the kitchen. What kind of host would I be if I made them do everything."

"I think you're missing something right here." He runs his fingers across her neck.

"If you think I'm going to sit here and let you give me a hickey with your entire family present, you are insanely wrong, mister." She tries to stand, but he holds her down.

"I'll give you hickeys later, but that's not what I was talking about."

He pulls a chain out of his shirt pocket and places it around Bella's neck before picking up the pendant to show her.

"You gave me the key to your house a long time ago, so I figured it was only fair if I gave you a key of my own. It would be pointless for you to have a key to my house, so what would you say about owning the key to my heart?"

He shows her the diamond-encrusted key, a small token of just how much he loves her.

"Honey," Bella breathes. "I would love to. I'll cherish and protect it for the rest of my life."

"Our life."

She nods, kissing him softly.

"All right." Edward smacks her on the ass. "Get in there and start cooking because they're only going to get more drunk as time goes on. We're going to need something to soak up all that rum."

He nods toward his father and brother-in-law.

"Sir, yes, sir." Bella clutches her new necklace and joins his mom and Rosalie.

There are squeals and ahs before he even takes a seat beside his dad.

It seems as though the girls approve of his gift.

When they aren't cooking, the girls pop in now and then while the guys sit and watch the endless loop of "A Christmas Story".

Everyone laughs because Bella knows all the lines and calls them from the kitchen frequently.

Edward is dating a dork.

He's in love with a dork.

And he wouldn't change one single thing about her.


	27. The Hermit 27

**27**

**The Hermit**

The week following Christmas is neither good nor bad for Bella.

She finds herself emotional when it comes time for Edward's parents to head back home.

It's funny; she was so nervous to meet Esme and Carlisle but having spent the better part of the week with them has changed her perspective entirely. Esme leaves with promises of video chat sessions so that she can show off her craft room and gossip about her children. There are tears, but there are also hugs. More hugs in the twenty-minute farewell than Bella thinks she shared with her parents in all of her eighteen years underneath their roof.

For one reason or another, she and Edward seem to find an excuse for him to have to stay over.

Night after night, it's the same thing. Each reason is more ludicrous than the one before it.

When Edward claims he hasn't had a chance to change the bedding since his parents left, Bella agrees wholeheartedly.

She knows for a fact Esme did a little maternal sprucing before her departure, but she doesn't want to sleep without him.

The following night, Edward declares that he's too tired to walk home, which is ridiculous, considering he lives right next door.

Bella is just as terrible, complaining that it's too chilly to sleep alone and insists that Edward is better than her old electric blanket.

The list goes on.

Sure, this means Bella has to wake up at four-thirty in the morning to see him off to work, but the pros certainly outweigh the cons. He says her sizzling kisses get him through the day with a smile on his face. She goes back to bed for a few hours, and then makes herself a cup of instant cappuccino to wake up.

While Edward's at work, Bella keeps herself busy, cooking him delicious meals and knitting hats to donate to local homeless shelters for the new year. Today, her hands are aching, but she's happy to watch the pile slowly grow, knowing that the donation will be greatly appreciated by the city's less fortunate population.

The season only seems to be getting colder this year.

Bella begins counting down the days until she'll see Zafrina again, and for once, she isn't dreading the session. Bella has so much to share that she's compiled a list so that she won't forget anything.

Her phone goes off, so she drops her knitting needles, a smile forming when she opens the text.

**I love you more than words can express. So I made you something to show you just how much.**

Another text, a picture this time.

_**To the moon and black and white cookies**_

_I love you more than you love peanut butter._

**That's an awful lot of love if you ask me, Sugar. Take that amount and multiply it by a million. That's how I feel about you. **

_Just stating the facts, Honey. And wow, that's a crazy amount of love, considering how much peanut butter you go through. How's today going? Is Rose there?_

Bella knows that Edward is getting frustrated with his sister. They haven't had a chance to talk because Rose has been out of work due to a terrible cold.

**She's here. We got the chance to talk a little before we opened ... we're closing early tonight, so we can figure some things out.**

_Is it that bad?_

**Nothing that I expected, to be honest. It's all a bit shocking, and it's going to change all of our lives. I'm bringing her home with me so the three of us can talk about it together. I didn't want to overwhelm you.**

_What about Emmett?_

**We'll talk about it when we get home. Just wanted to warn you.**

_It's fine, Honey. Get back to work and come home to me. Love you. _

**Love you too, Sugar.**

Bella pulls a few chicken breasts out to defrost and gathers the ingredients for scalloped potatoes because she knows they happen to be Rose's favorite.

With dinner in the oven, she returns to her basket of yarn and gets back to work on her project.

The day passes quickly and Bella is basting the chicken when the front door opens.

"Sugar?"

"Checking on dinner." She switches the oven to warm and wipes her hands on her apron as she rounds the corner. Bella can't help but gasp at the sight before her.

Rose looks absolutely haggard—her face red and tear stained, and it looks like she's lost weight. Bella's no doctor, but she's pretty sure pregnant women are supposed to gain weight, not the other way around.

"Um. Is everything okay?" she asks dumbly.

Edward pulls her in for a hug.

"No. Not by a long shot," he whispers, stepping aside so Rose can fall into her friend's arms.

"Hi, Bells." She sobs.

"Hi, Rose. Let's sit down okay?" Bella offers.

Edward slips out of his heavy coat and boots, and then takes a seat on the coffee table in front of the girls with a stiff upper lip.

Nerves settle deep in Bella's stomach.

"I don't even know how to begin to apologize to both of you for Christmas and how I handled, well, didn't handle everything. I should have never put you in that position, Bella. We had everything so carefully planned out, and then I screwed it all up."

"It's fine, Rose. We made it through the holiday, and it was easily the best I've ever had," Bella assures her.

"No, it's not. Edward was right. I wasn't a good friend."

Edward makes a choking sound and reaches for his sister's hand.

"I said that before I knew what was going on, Ro. I never would have said that if you would have just talked to me."

This sets off a new round of tears for Rose.

Bella tells Edward to run upstairs and grab a wet washcloth, and then wipes Rose's face gently.

"Please tell me you aren't this upset about Christmas," she pleads.

"No, I wish it was just that." She weeps. "I almost lost the baby a week before Christmas."

"What?"

"I woke up in the middle of the night, cramping really badly, and I couldn't get Emmett to wake up, so I drove myself to the hospital. They told me the baby might not be viable, that sometimes things just aren't meant to be. I spent the entire week waiting for my OB appointment, fearing I was going to miscarry, and I took everything out on Edward."

"Why in hell didn't your husband drive you to the hospital?" Bella demands. "Why didn't you call us?"

Rose shrugs. "I didn't want to burden my brother or you. My appointment went well. They said I was just experiencing growing pains and that the baby is a fighter. As for Emmett, you were in your own personal Christmas bubble, and with everything going on, you probably didn't realize that we pretty much avoided each other. He got so drunk here that I had to help him into the house when we got home. We made it to the couch, and he just flopped down face first. I asked him if he needed anything, and he told me he wanted a divorce."

"What?" Bella glances over to Edward, and he nods.

"I don't know what made him say that. The next day, he claimed he couldn't remember anything past dinner, but I couldn't get it out of my head, and he's been acting off for a while, even before the baby. I filed the papers yesterday. I can't be married to someone who secretly doesn't want me. And I'll be damned if I'm going to bring a baby into that kind of environment."

"Wow. I never would have expected this." Bella squeezes Rose's shoulders. "I'll be here for you in any way I can, Rose."

"Rosalie and I talked this morning," Edward explains, reaching for Bella's hand with his free one. "How would you feel about having an extra neighbor for a while? I have a guest room, and Rosalie needs somewhere to stay. I offered to let her move in until she can get back on her feet."

"Of course. Of course." Bella nods. "I'd feel better having her close, just in case she needs something."

Rose chuckles.

"I'm pregnant not a needy patient. I'm sure I can manage. I just need a place to sleep until I can figure things out. It will be nice having a friend next door just in case I need to borrow a cup of sugar or something."

Bella and Edward share a knowing smile.

"EW. Okay. Ed, I have to figure the furniture thing out, but I'm exhausted, so I'm going to crash in your bed for a couple hours. You two go do whatever it is you do when you get like this. Again, EW."

Edward doesn't wait for his sister to leave; he pulls his keys out of his pocket and throws them in her general direction before pulling Bella up the stairs.

"Dinner will be done around six or seven!" she calls downstairs before the front door shuts.

Edward doesn't waste any time getting Bella naked. He whispers his need for her, his dirty words turning her into a writhing mess as he pulls the stretchy fabric of her shirt over her head and devours her mouth.

She's still pmsing, but that doesn't mean she can't bring him pleasure.

"Get naked." Bella gasps.

"Or what?"

She leans up on her elbows and gives him a tantalizing smile. "Or I won't let you fuck my mouth."

She watches Edward choke on his tongue and laughs as he fumbles around.

"Wait. Leave the jacket on."

Edward looks down at the chef's jacket he's wearing. A Christmas gift from Bella. She thought he'd look nice without sleeves, showing off his forearms, and all of his other jackets are white. This one is black with red trimming, and she plans on ordering more so he can wear them instead.

Because he looks scrumptious in his new chef's jacket.

"This isn't going to become some sort of fetish for you, is it?"

"Who knows. Come here and let's find out."

"So bossy." He tsks.

"Lie down on your back."

"Yes, ma'am."

Bella leaves a trail of open-mouthed kisses from Edward's lips to where he's hard and more than ready for her.

"Hmm. I've been thinking about this all day."

"Me too," he says breathily.

Bella swirls her tongue around the sensitive head, knowing how much he enjoys it, and hums thoughtfully.

"I never thought I would like something like this, but there's something about being in control." She grasps him firmly. "Knowing that I do this to you makes me so hot."

Before Edward can reply, she takes him in her mouth.

"Bella, ung."

She smiles, dragging her teeth before releasing him with a pop.

"Seriously, you're going to owe me when I'm not indisposed. I haven't been keeping score, but I'm sure you won't disappoint."

"Please," he cries.

"Please what, Honey?" she asks while she pumps him slowly.

"Please make me come," Edward pleads.

"Like this?" Bella squeezes him right below the mushroom-shaped head.

He groans but shakes his head back and forth.

"Then how? Talk to me, Honey."

"With your mouth, Sugar."

Bella chuckles darkly and releases him completely.

"You'll have to be more specific." She places a kiss on his hip and lets her warm breath wash over his abdomen.

Edward's body breaks out in goosebumps and trembles with need.

"Bella, please take my cock in that pretty mouth of yours and milk me for all I'm worth."

Not wanting to disappoint him, Bella does exactly as he asks, not stopping until he's fully satisfied.

With a happy sigh, she climbs up and rests her head on his shoulder. Her fingers smooth out the wrinkled fabric of his chef's jacket.

"I like watching you come into your own in the bedroom, Sugar." Edward smirks. "It's fun figuring out just how kinky you are."

"Kinky?"

Edward points to his chest.

"Making me keep the jacket on."

Bella's face gets hot. "Yeah, that gift was bought purely out of selfishness. You have very sexy forearms."

"Hmm. Making me tell you what I want."

She laughs.

"That was beneficial for both of us, and you know it."

"I'm not complaining, Sugar. It's the exact opposite. I enjoy watching you flourish." He kisses her forehead. "The hair pulling is a big surprise."

Bella's face flames with embarrassment. "Is that not a normal thing?"

"I'm sure a lot of women enjoy having their hair pulled, Bella. I would have never guessed you would be one of those women. It's sexy."

"Hmm, I agree."

"Now that you've had your fun, can I take this jacket off? I've been wearing it all day."

"I suppose." Bella giggles and pulls at the buttons until he can shrug it off.

They cuddle, Edward's long fingers drawing random patterns along Bella's bareback while they wait for dinner to finish cooking.

"Are we going to talk about what's going on with Rose?" she mumbles against his beating heart.

"It's not something we can just ignore. I've known Em for years, and he never once made me feel like he was unhappy. All this time, I've been thinking that Rosalie was just trying to make me miserable, and in truth, she was just trying to cope with her life at home."

"You couldn't have known, Honey. But now that I think about it, when they announced they were pregnant, he seemed a little detached. I didn't know him enough to think it was odd."

"Ro thinks it's the baby that set him off. They decided about a year ago to start trying, and when she got pregnant, he just changed." Edward kisses Bella's shoulders. "It's going to be weird living with my sister and working with her. It's a good thing I spend most of my time with you, so I can at least get a little reprieve until she figures out what to do next."

Bella leans up on an elbow. "We're going to have a baby in a few short months, you know. She's going to need a room for the baby, a nursery and space for all of its things."

"I know. I'm going to contact my landlord tomorrow to see if he has anything relatively close by. She's going to need people in her corner, so I want to keep her close while she finds her footing."

"I'd prefer if she stayed next door. I mean, I've never tried to go to your apartment before, but I think I could manage it, and if she needed help, I'd be right here."

"So, I guess I'll have a semi-permanent roommate until at least after the baby is born." He shrugs.

Bella kisses him on the cheek and pulls back. "What if we changed the living situation up just a little?"

Edward motions for her to continue.

"Well, you practically live here anyway. What if you let Rose take over the lease next door, and we can make the guest room into a nursery for the baby. She'll be close, and she'll have room for everything. We'll be right next door for support. That way, you can have a life separate from your work relationship."

"Did you just ask me to move in with you?"

"Yeah. I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to. I'd understand if you aren't ready—"

Edward kisses Bella quiet, pulling away with one of his signature goofy grins.

"Are you seriously asking me if I'm okay with having this"—he squeezes her tit—"anytime I want?"

She giggles and swats his hands away. "There are other reasons, you fiend. Think about it. You've spent the majority of your time here for months now and haven't slept at your house since before Christmas."

"The pros would certainly outweigh the cons." He grins.

His hands find her lust-heavy breasts, and she holds back a groan.

"I've never lived with someone besides my family before. I might be bad at it," he warns.

"We work well together, Honey. I'm sure we'll have our ups and downs. I know I will. I am worried about something though."

Edward focuses his attention on her face.

"What?"

Bella's face is warm. "We haven't had sex yet. What if you move in, and we finally do it, and I'm so bad you regret moving in?"

Edward snorts and Bella smacks his chest.

"I'm serious. Maybe we should get it over with before you make a decision."

"Sugar, we definitely aren't going to just get our first time over with. I'd love to move in with you and slowly work our way up to it."

"So, it's official. You're moving in with me?"

"It's official."


	28. The Hunk 28

**28**

**The Hunk**

Edward's never given much thought into New Year's Day. To him, it's just another day.

Sure, it's the beginning of the new year, and most people make promises that they very rarely keep.

Edward doesn't make resolutions. Growing up he wasn't much of a partier, and the only somewhat serious relationship he's had was back in high school. He was unable to get a New Year's kiss because of her restrictive curfew. He wasn't too disappointed, missing out on that tradition.

Bella made him promise that he wouldn't do anything special for the holiday, and he's glad because Edward doesn't think he could come up with anything.

Instead, he and Rosalie close the shop and drive home together to save on gas.

A lot of things have changed for his sister in a short time but Rosalie has thrived.

They expected Emmett to show up the day he was served divorce papers but the day passed and then the next with no sign of the deadbeat.

Rosalie has been in good spirits though. Her focus is on making her new house a home and preparing for the baby.

She has furniture being delivered, and Edward has a girlfriend that he's been itching to see all day.

"I'm going to let you and Bella have the night to yourselves. Baby and I want to order a bunch of take-out and go to bed early," Rosalie tells him, rubbing her belly.

"You're sure? You don't want to ring in the new year with us? The whole new year, new you thing?" he asks, but he really hopes it doesn't change her mind. He's all for spending alone time with Bella.

"I honestly can't stay up past ten most nights. The new year will still be there tomorrow whether I watch the ball drop or not. You and Bella are doing a lot for me. You need some time for yourselves."

"Okay. Thanks, Ro."

She nods.

Once he makes sure she's safely in her house, he enters his, calling out.

"Upstairs!" Bella yells.

Edward is surprised to find her sitting in the middle of their bed, wearing nothing but a glittery top hat and a pair of blinking 2019 glasses.

"I thought you said we weren't doing anything special for the holiday?" He smirks.

Bella shrugs, and her giant glasses slide down her nose.

"I said you couldn't do anything. I, on the other hand, decided to take the cheesy way out and bought this crap online last minute. Two-day shipping is an amazing invention."

"Hmm. So we're going to spend the holiday in bed with you wearing that getup? Hot."

Bella smiles widely. "I got you something to wear too." She leans over the side of the bed, producing a green top hat, a pair of glasses, and a ridiculous Happy New Year tie.

"No."

"No?" Bella pouts. "But it's festive."

"I'd rather wear my chef's jacket than that tie, Sugar."

"Well, what if we played it up a little?" She slips the tie over her head without removing the hat or glasses so it takes some effort. "What if I wore it instead?"

Edward watches the long slip of fabric resting between her perfect tits.

"That might be doable."

"I thought it might be." She beckons him over with a crooked finger. "Get over here."

Edward steps out of his shoes and climbs onto the bed. He wraps the tie around his hand and pulls her in for a kiss. "I don't know how you manage to look so ridiculous and sexy at the same time. Are you a witch?"

Bella laughs against his mouth. "No. I decided that I wanted to make our first New Year's together special."

"We're together, so it's already special, Sugar."

Her big brown eyes roll into the back of her head.

"More special than that."

Bella makes quick work of the buttons on his chef's jacket and tosses it across the room.

"How so?"

She licks his earlobe and whispers softly. "I'm ready, Honey."

Edward's breath hitches. "Ready?"

Bella hums in agreement and bites his neck, using her tongue to soothe the ache. "I would like for you to make me yours, completely, before the new year."

"You're already mine, Sugar."

"You told me I would never have to beg for your love. Don't be a liar, Edward Cullen."

Edward chuckles and lets Bella undress him.

"I've been waiting forever. I want to feel you inside me. All of you," she tells him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down to kiss his lips. "Have me, Honey."

"Wait."

Bella grumbles and falls back on the bed with a frown. "What now?"

"I love you, but I'm not going to make love to you for the first time while you're wearing all that."

Instead of arguing, Bella quickly rids herself of the gaudy get up before pulling him back down. "No more excuses. Do me."

"Bella." Edward laughs.

"I'm sorry. I forgot you wanted this to be romantic." She pecks his lips. "Please make love to me, Honey. We're more than ready for this. I want to be yours."

Edward whispers his love for her and nestles between her thighs.

"Hmm. I love you too. I want to show you just how much," she says, reaching down and leading him to where she wants him the most.

Edward slides inside her warmth with one quick thrust and Bella practically levitates off the bed with a high keen moan.

He peppers her face with kisses while she gets accustomed to the intrusion.

His forehead rests against hers, and there's a goofy grin on his face. "You okay, Sugar?"

"I'm perfect. I could stay like this forever, but I know it'll feel even better when you actually do something." She drags her teeth against his chin. "I'm severely lacking in this department, so if you wanna give me some tips of the trade, that'll be fine."

"You're a fucking pro without even trying, Bella. Do you want to be on top?" He pulls out and thrusts into her slowly.

Bella's hips raise up, meeting his movements with vigor.

"No. I'm good. Keep doing that." She gasps.

Edward chuckles darkly and begins the slow dance of working her body over. He sucks her nipples into his mouth and bites her right above her heart as he moves.

He does his damnedest to worship her body and convey just how much he loves her. It takes everything in him to hold off because she's perfect, warm and tight.

"Oh, Edward," Bella cries when he changes angles his hips.

"I love you. I'm always going to love you," he whispers into her mouth. "We're gonna be forever, just you watch."

"Yes. I'm yours. Always." She pants. "I'm so close."

Bella groans in frustration when Edward comes to a stop.

"What now?" she grits.

"Nothing, Sugar. I just wanted to see your face when you come apart for the first time. I wanna remember this moment."

Bella nods, pulling him down for a searing kiss.

With a few more thrusts and gentle pressure against Bella's clit, they come apart, loud moans and gasping names.

Edward collapses on top of Bella, sweaty and satiated, kissing her breathless.

"Hmm. Happy New Year to me." Bella giggles, running her hands through his slick hair with a satisfied grin.

"I can't believe I'm in love with such a dork."

Her fingers pull at the ends of his hair. "I don't think our first time could have been any more perfect than it was, Honey. Thank you for giving me that."

He's shocked when tears start falling down her cheeks. "Bella?"

"I'm okay." She cries. "Just overwhelmed with feelings."

"Good feelings?"

"The best. I've never felt so cherished and loved than I do right now."q

Edward kisses her trembling lips.

"I love you, and I can't wait to spend my life showing you just how much." He checks the clock. "We have a couple hours before the programs start. Do you want to take a nap?"

Gone are the tears, instantly replaced by a seductive smile. "I'm not tired."

Edward hardens against her thigh at the idea of having her again. "Are you sore?"

"A little, but I'll be okay if I'm a bit sorer."

"I've created a monster." Edward chuckles.

"Indeed. Roll over. I wanna be on top."

"Fuck, Bella."

"That's the idea, Honey." She giggles, straddling him.

It takes her a minute to get comfortable with the idea, and Bella refuses to use his chest as leverage, so he sits up and helps her find her grip on the headboard.

She bites her lip. "How do I do this?"

Edward can't help but laugh.

"Don't be a dick. This is my first time."

"I know. I'm sorry." He adjusts her hips until she can easily slide down him. "You're in control this time, Sugar." He pulls her down, and Bella moans in his ear. "However slow or fast you want."

"Hmm, fuck." She gasps when she's fully seated. "So good."

Bella takes her sweet time finding out what works and what doesn't.

Edward has to stop her occasionally to regain control.

It's awkward and uncomfortable at times, but she eventually finds her groove, and they both benefit.

"I fucking love you," she breathes. "I love fucking you."

"I love you too, Sugar."

When he can't hold off any longer, and he knows Bella is close, he grabs one of her hands and places her fingers on her throbbing clit.

"Um." She tries to stop, but he grips her hips and guides her up and down.

"Fast circles. You'll know what feels right."

Within seconds, Bella is bouncing on his lap, head thrown back and screaming his name as he explodes deep inside her.

"Oh. Fuck. Yes."

It takes a while for Bella to be able to form full sentences that make sense.

"I am so happy that you live here now. That you're mine. That I get to love you forever." Bella muffles a yawn against his chest. "But right now, we need to take a nap. We'll order Chinese and watch the ball drop. Maybe break in the new couch."

"Go to sleep, pervert."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Bella dislikes Ryan Seacrest with a passion and hates that he's the one they decided to replace Dick Clark on New Year's Rockin' Eve.

"He's like a wet diaper. He doesn't get me excited for the new year like Clark used to," she grumbles, reaching out to feed Edward a shrimp.

He's still clueless when it comes to chopsticks. She's given up on trying to teach him and decides to love him regardless.

Edward chuckles.

"You were what? Nine when Dick Clark hosted his last celebration?"

Bella nods.

"Alice and I watched every year while our parents attended whatever socialite party they were invited to. Dick Clark was my first crush." She blushes and takes great interest in her lo mien.

"Really? That's pretty disturbing, considering how much older he was than you."

Bella shrugs and turns back to the television to watch the garbage band perform.

Unfortunately, they eat too much to break in the new couch or ring in the new year with a bang like she wanted to. Instead, they choose their cookies, cracking them open and laughing.

"You'll be hungry in half an hour, but one can never regret Chinese food." Bella snorts. "What does yours say?"

"You'll move in with your beautiful girlfriend and start the next chapter of your lives together."

Bella smacks Edward on his arm. "Be serious."

"Fine. Your girlfriend is never going to let you have any fun ever again."

"Honey, you realize you're spending January first sleeping on the couch, right?"

"Fine. My cookie just has a smiley face. I guess it's pretty fitting."

"How so?"

"Because I haven't stopped smiling in ages. You make me incredibly happy, Sugar."

Bella laughs and takes the tiny slip from him.

"You just don't want to sleep on the couch. Flattery will get you nowhere, mister."

Edward watches her tack it to the corkboard above the desk.

The awful band is finished performing, so Bella curls into his side and turns the volume back up.

"If I promise to do that thing with my fingers and my mouth, do I still have to sleep on the couch?" he asks before Seacrest announces that it's almost time to start the clock.

"I guess, but we're going to have to take a rain check. I'm sore in all the right places."

The slow countdown begins, and Bella climbs onto Edward's lap.

"I've never had a New Year's kiss before. I'm glad you're my first."

"You're my first too, Sugar."

_10_

_9_

_8_

_7_

_6_

_5_

_4_

_3_

_2_

_1_

"Happy New Year, Honey," Bella mumbles against his mouth.

"Happy New Year, Sugar." He kisses her deeply before pulling away. "We're going to ring in the New Year together for so many years, just you watch. I fucking love you."

Bella's eyes glisten with unshed tears.

"I love you too."


	29. The Hermit - Zafrina 29

**29**

**The Hermit**

**Zafrina's POV**

She isn't sure what to expect when she arrives at Bella Swan's home, but Zafrina has a lot of hope in her heart for the girl. She's been through a lot and finally deserves some good in her life. Zafrina is hopeful considering that Bella never called the emergency number in the three months since their last appointment. Bella was in a good place then. Zafrina was comfortable with the progression of her patient's relationship with her neighbor, a man who was patient and kind. She felt that Edward might be the push Bella needed to begin healing. She turns her sedan onto Bella Swan's street and a smile forms at the sight of the girl who couldn't stand on her front porch three short months ago, sitting on the curb in front of her house.

When she sees Zafrina's car, Bella stands, bouncing from one foot to the other with excitement. "Surprise!" she calls before the car comes to a complete stop in the parking spot.

"I'll say!" Zafrina laughs, gathering her tote. "Look at you."

"Haven't gotten much farther than this, but Edward and I sit in his car sometimes." Bella blushes.

"Let's get inside, it's freezing, and I see we have a lot to talk about."

Bella wraps her arm around Zafrina's and leads her into the house.

This is the first time she's willingly touched Zafrina aside from the anniversary of her wedding that never happened. This pleases the doctor very much.

"I made cocoa, but I have tea or coffee if you'd like." Bella smiles, peeling off her winter jacket.

"Cocoa is fine," Zafrina says, taking a look around the townhouse.

There are a lot of subtle changes that have taken place over the past three months.

The prints of the famous artwork that once adorned the walls have all been replaced with tons of original and candid photos. A majority of them of Bella, a very handsome man—she assumes is Edward, and a beautiful blonde. Some include an older couple, obviously parents of the latter two.

Bella exits the kitchen with a small tray with two steaming mugs and a bowl of marshmallows.

She takes a seat on the sofa and Zafrina notices that has changed as well. It's larger than the old couch and less feminine. She has so many questions.

"We have so much to talk about," the girl says, passing her a mug and offering her a pair of tongs for the marshmallows.

"I can see that." Zafrina pulls her binder out and flips to a blank page so she can take notes as they discuss everything that's happened.

"You've redecorated." She points out, gesturing to the more masculine throw pillows and the walls.

"Mmm hmm," Bella mumbles into her cup. "The house was a little girly, and I wanted Edward to feel at home when he agreed to move in."

Zafrina's pen skids across the paper, and her eyebrows disappear underneath her hairline, but Bella doesn't notice.

"His sister is going through some stuff, and she's pregnant. He was going to move her into his townhouse, but she's going to need room for the baby. We've grown close, so I want her to be nearby, just in case she needs something. I mean, I'm not much, but it's better than being completely alone." Bella blows on her hot chocolate and takes a sip. "Edward had been staying with me since before Christmas, and we're in a good place, so I asked him to make it a permanent thing."

"That's a big deal, Bella," Zafrina says, making notes. "And how is it? Cohabitating?"

Bella's face lights up. "Wonderful. I love having him here. We're in love. Rose calls it our honeymoon phase because we can't keep our hands to ourselves."

Zafrina watches a deep blush bloom over the girl's face. She decides to save the topic of intimacy for later. "Let's start from the beginning. How was your Thanksgiving? Don't you host your sister and her fiancé?"

Bella's smile falters as she stumbles through the highs and lows of her first Thanksgiving with Edward. Zafrina listens intently and sets her pen down to lean forward. "This is a big breakthrough, Bella. You might not believe it but you handled the situation well."

"If anything, it brought us closer. I shared everything with him that night. Everything."

"You say you're close with his sister. Care to elaborate?"

Bella nods. "Edward not so subtly hinted that he wanted me to meet his parents when they came for Christmas. I decided to have a trial run with his sister and her husband—well soon to be ex-husband. Rose jokes that it was love at first sight for us. She likes to hit on me every chance she gets, but it's all in good fun."

They share a laugh.

"I take it you agreed to meet Edward's parents." Zafrina points to some pictures that include the older couple.

"Yes. It was a bit of a clusterfuck." She claps a hand over her mouth. "I'm sorry. Edward is a bad influence on me in some departments."

The doctor just shrugs it off.

"Rose made things difficult for us. Everything we carefully planned went up in flames the day before Christmas Eve. Edward had to pick up his parents from the airport, and then they had to stay next door. That worked in my favor because he was going to be stuck sleeping on the floor in his empty guest room. I asked him to stay with me, and he never left."

Zafrina hums and jots down a few notes.

"His parents are wonderful, and his mom is a hobbyist, so we spent the entire day baking and decorating cookies on Christmas Eve. Alice and I did that, but it was nice spending time with the people who created the love of my life."

"Where was Alice during the holiday?"

Bella explains Jasper's family emergency and that them leaving was the final reason for her to agree to meet Edward's family.

"I started having my doubts when Rose began stirring everything up, but it ended up working out pretty well."

"Have Rose's problems affected you personally aside from Christmas?"

"Honestly, it was hard for me at first. Edward came home livid the day before Christmas Eve and scared the crap out of me. He considered dissolving their partnership at the bakery they co-own. Once they talked, and we found out the truth, things changed." Bella takes a deep breath. "Rose's ex, Emmett, decided he wasn't ready for a family, and her life imploded. She was completely blindsided. We've kind of formed a small family of our own. I'm going to be Aunt Bella to a really awesome kid who Edward and I will be there to help raise. It takes a village and all that."

"So Aunt Bella. I bet you've been knitting up a storm for the baby."

Bella shows off the box of gender-neutral baby clothes she's been working on.

"I can't wait for Rose to find out the sex so I can go into greater detail with everything. We don't have much longer to wait."

Zafrina couldn't be prouder of Bella if she tried. She asks questions, and Bella is quick to answer them. "You insinuate that you and Edward are in the honeymoon phase. I take it that means the two of you are intimate?"

Bella's face turns red. "Yeah. We worked our way up to sex because I lack experience in that whole department. It was a gradual build up, and we went at our own pace. We've been together for so long, but it didn't go from zero to sixty. We took our time, and I never felt overwhelmed. He shows me how to love, and what it's like to be loved. Edward's a patient teacher. He also has a couple of rules."

"Rules?" Zafrina asks Bella to elaborate.

"Yeah. I have a lot of catching up to do, experience wise, so Edward lets me experiment and learn as I go. One of his rules is that I come first, well, most of the time." Her blush deepens. "And we always have the lights on, no exceptions. Being with him is completely different from my past. Like night and day."

"Are the two of you being safe?"

"Of course. I've been on the pill since I was a teenager, and we're both clean."

They talk about the highs and lows of the past two months. The progress and the setbacks, and Bella gets to show off her Christmas Eve present from Edward.

"It's better at night, but you get the idea."

Zafrina smiles. Edward Cullen seems like he'd do anything for Bella, and she's glad the girl has finally found someone to cherish her as much as she deserves. "I'm glad you've found a good guy, Bella. Our time is almost up, but I feel like we could continue for hours. I'd love to, but I have an appointment after this."

"It's fine. The next time we see each other, I hope I'll have made more progress, and we'll have loads of new stuff to talk about."

"I look forward to it. Now, I'm proud of you, but we still have homework to talk about."

Bella rubs her hands together in preparation with a big smile gracing her pretty face. "Lay it on me."


	30. The Hunk 30

**Happy Holidays all! I will be taking the week off for Christmas. updates will resume next Saturday!**

**30**

**The Hunk**

It's been three weeks since Bella's session with her psychiatrist, and Edward is tempted to call and give Zafrina a piece of his mind.

He grips the steering wheel tightly and tries not to look at the emotional wreck in the passenger seat. He can't watch her put herself through this again. He's already done it twenty-three times now, and it breaks him a little more each time.

"Ugh." Bella grunts, wiping the tears pouring out of her eyes on the sleeve of her sweater. "It shouldn't be this hard, Edward."

He sighs.

"Sugar, you've been stuck in your house for two years, and you've made a lot of headway. Zafrina didn't mean for you to push yourself this hard. We have plenty of time to try this before you see her again."

Bella sobs.

"I'm a grown woman, and I can't even drive to the end of the street. I'm safe, in the car, with someone I love, and I just can't do it."

They're parked in front of the townhouse, the car idling and waiting for Bella to give the go ahead that won't come.

At least, not yet.

Edward can tell she isn't ready for this, but she insists.

Bella's putting too much pressure on herself, and she's starting to revert to the way she was when they first met. It's breaking his heart to see her like this.

Just last night she woke up covered in sweat and having a panic attack that rivaled the one he witnessed on Thanksgiving. Edward tried to remain calm, but inside he was freaking out when he couldn't get her to breathe. He was about to call for an ambulance when her anxiety medication finally kicked in, and she was able to mellow out.

He knows she's close to her breaking point, and he's right behind her in that department. Edward hasn't slept since their first attempt, and Rosalie insisted they hire a part-time assistant for him so The Bakery wouldn't suffer.

When Edward isn't with Bella, his sister steps in. He's truly afraid to leave her alone. He knows it's time to call Zafrina, but he's afraid. Of what? He doesn't know. Perhaps it's the unknown.

"I'm ready to go back inside," Bella mumbles, exhausted from the last hour and a half.

He watches her reach for the handle and fail a few times before he leans over and opens the door for her.

He helps her inside and gets her situated on the couch before heading to the kitchen to make her a cup of Sleepytime Tea. Rosalie recommended it because it helps Bella relax enough to nap after one of her attempts.

Edward watches the kettle warm up and blinks away the tears threatening to fall. He's so lost, but Bella begs him every time he reaches for his phone. She pleads with him not to call Zafrina. That tomorrow will be better. That she'll be able to do it. But tomorrow comes and it's never different and the vicious cycle starts over. Edward makes the decision to call Zafrina, Bella's pleading be damned.

He's reaching for his phone when it starts ringing.

Rosalie.

"Ro? Is everything okay?"

"_Yeah. Angela and I are just cleaning up. She knows she's not as good as you, but the customers enjoy her goods just fine."_

Edward breathes heavily.

"I'm sorry, Ro. I just don't have time to talk about business right now. Bella's having a rough day."

Another rough day. All they've had have been rough days.

"_I figured that when she didn't call me to announce that she had made the trip. I'm calling because Angela and I were talking, we've been talking for a couple of days, and she mentioned that her husband is a psychiatrist."_

"I don't think changing doctors is a good idea right now." No matter how much he hates Zafrina, right now he knows that Bella can't handle another stresser.

"_Ben isn't taking on new clients anyway. Angela talked to him last night about Bella's situation, and he has some advice." Rosalie adjusts the phone. "Try it at night, Ed. She'll be more comfortable because there won't be as many people on the road as there are during the day. I'll even come and sit in the back seat if you think it'll help."_

Edward's eyes blur with tears. Why didn't he think of this?

The kettle starts to squeal, so he makes Bella's tea, leaving the bag to steep while he wraps up his conversation with Rosalie.

"I'm willing to try anything. I'll get her to take a nap, and we'll do it tonight. If it doesn't work, I'm calling Zafrina. I can't keep this up. I have to drug her almost constantly."

"_I know, Ed. It's affecting all of us. Even Baby. This is going to work. I have a great feeling. If Ben is booked solid, he must be good. Not saying that Bella's doctor isn't."_

"I know what you mean. Let me get back to her. Please check in when you get home so I know you got here safely."

"_Will do. Love you." _

She hangs up before Edward can reply, so he drops his phone on the counter and steels himself before returning to Bella.

He finds her curled up in a ball fast asleep and frowns. She's lost weight. Her face is always pale. The dark circles under her eyes are only growing darker.

Edward isn't a religious man, but he pleads silently that she'll get some relief soon. Rosalie said she had a good feeling about tonight, but he just can't find it in him to get too excited over something that could backfire.

He decides to go upstairs and clean up after last night's panic attack while she sleeps. He strips the bed of the sweat-stained sheets and drops them into the washing machine, checking on her before returning to his task.

He makes the bed with Bella's favorite sheets and comforter and lays out the pajamas she wears the most with the idea to keep her as calm as possible before they try to make it around the block. He'll have her take a bath and dress for bed just in case things go south and he has to sedate her.

Again.

It kills him to force those pills down her throat.

He checks on her again. She's facing the back of the couch now. Her cheeks are tear-stained, and he wants to wipe them clean but knows it will wake her up. She needs to rest. Edward needs rest. He's beyond exhausted, but he can't relax until she's okay. He's killing himself slowly.

"Honey."

Edward peeks over the back of the couch and finds her awake.

"Hi, Sugar. You okay?"

Bella shrugs and scooches over. "You should come lie down with me. You look tired."

He kicks off his shoes and lies next to her, pulling and adjusting until they're touching toes to nose.

Edward gives a shaky breath. "I love you, Sugar. I wish I could fix this for you."

He's emotional and exhausted, but he's still surprised when tears start to pour from his eyes like a faucet. He doesn't want her to feel guilty or think he isn't strong enough to get her through this.

"Oh, Honey," Bella cries. "I'm so sorry."

"No," Edward chokes. "I'm sorry. I just hate seeing you like this. It's killing me."

Bella frowns. "You can go if you need to. I don't want to drag you down because I can't function like a normal member of—"

"You shut your mouth right now," Edward tells her, placing a hand over her mouth. "I'm not going anywhere unless you're going with me. No matter what. So don't even go there, okay?"

Bella nods and pulls his hand away, but she doesn't let it go.

"You're perfect, Bella. We're going to get past this, and we're going to start tonight." He kisses her salty, chapped lips.

"Tonight?"

Edward nods. "Rosalie has an idea. We're going to try again tonight when there aren't so many people around. I truly think it will help a great deal."

"I'm willing to try anything." She yawns. "But we both could use a good nap. I know you haven't been sleeping. and I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'd do anything for you, Sugar. This is just a bump in the road to our forever. I promise."

Bella yawns again, pulling the blanket off the back of the couch over them.

Edward's body relaxes for the first time since the day of Bella's therapy appointment when they tried it for the first time.

Hours later, he wakes up alone on the couch, a blanket tucked around him tightly.

The house smells delicious, and he can hear Bella tinkering around in the kitchen while Rosalie tells her all about Angela.

"I really think you're going to like her. She's quiet, but she's pretty great. I'm going to miss seeing her every day when Edward comes back full time—" Rosalie pauses abruptly. "Oh, no, Bella. It's fine. He needs to be here for you right now, and to be honest, he can't keep going being the only one in the kitchen anyway. This whole situation has taught us that we need backup."

Edward wants to go check on Bella, but he knows that sometimes he isn't what she needs. Rosalie is the perfect stand in.

"I know. I just hate that it's gotten this bad. I should have let Edward call Zafrina a long time ago."

"Tonight's going to work, Bells. Have a little faith," Rosalie insists.

"I lost my faith a long time ago, Rose. I need you to promise me something."

"Anything. Name it."

"If tonight goes bad, I want you to go into my phone and call Zafrina's emergency line. Just give them my name and tell them nine-one-one," Bella says softly. "Please don't make your brother do it."

"It's not necessary, but I promise."

Bella gives Rosalie her passcode, and Edward decides that he needs to "wake up".

He gives a loud yawn, kicks the coffee table, and stumbles into the kitchen.

"Hi, beautiful ladies. I smell something delicious."

Bella smiles timidly and points to the crock pot. "I made some of Gran's cheddar broccoli soup, and Rose brought home some croissants from work."

"Sounds good. I'm going to run to the bathroom while you two dish everything out." He kisses her mouth and rushes out of the room.

Edward takes care of business and washes his face before joining the girls at the table.

For the first few minutes, the only sounds are spoons hitting the bottom of bowls and appreciative sighs until Bella brings up tonight's attempt.

"I think I should take a Xanax before we leave the house. Just to be safe."

Edward's spoon falls back into his bowl, splattering the tablecloth with soup.

Rosalie shoots him a stern look and nods her head.

"Yeah, Sugar. That sounds like a good idea," he says, picking his spoon back up.

He's not hungry anymore, but he doesn't want to upset her, so he stirs his soup around and picks at the flaky pastry next to his bowl.

Tonight has to go well. He doesn't know what Zafrina will do if it doesn't. He just knows that it won't be good.

Edward offers to do the dishes while the girls relax in the living room.

They talk softly about the baby, Rosalie found out last week that she's having a girl, but there was little excitement, considering Bella's distress. His sister was understanding, given the situation, saying they would celebrate after Bella's success.

They've gotten pretty close, and their relationship has changed—Edward and Rosalie's. Sure, they still give each other shit and fight over petty stuff, but there's more caring and conversation now.

He starts the dishwasher and dries his hands before joining them.

"Have you thought of names?" Bella asks while her hands roam over Rosalie's bare stomach. "She kicked!"

"I know." Rosalie laughs. "I feel it on the inside all the time. I considered naming her after the love of my life, but it would get confusing, having two Bellas wandering around."

Bella snorts.

"I'm serious."

"Our grandmother's name was Elizabeth Katherine, and I really like the idea of Katherine, Kat for short. I'm dead serious about the middle name though. You're my best friend, and I want you to know how important you are to me. Katherine Marie Cullen."

Bella's lip quivers. "I would love to share my middle name with the coolest kid on the planet. Thank you, Rose."

"No, thank you. Seriously, you and Edward have saved me more times than I can count, and my life is better with you in it."

"Ditto," Edward comments.

Rosalie grabs his hand and places it on her side.

He feels his niece kick and punch against him excitedly.

She's going to be a handful just like her mother.

Rosalie makes an excuse to stay at their house while they get bundled up.

"I brought some cookie dough that Angela had left over, so I'm going to attempt to make something edible while you're out. I'd rather leave the mess in your oven if things go south."

Bella shrugs and zips up her coat, slightly mellowed from the medication.

She wraps her arm around Edward's middle as they walk to the car.

"How do you feel, Sugar?"

"Honestly, I feel a little different, but I'm trying not to get my hopes up."

He opens the passenger door for her and takes a deep breath before getting inside.

_Please go well._

Edward starts the car and looks at Bella expectantly.

Her hands start to shake, but she grips her thighs, breathes heavily, and nods her head. "Go."

"Are you—"

"Don't ask me if I'm sure. Go," She states firmly.

Edward slowly shifts the car out of park and into drive and moves about a foot before turning back to Bella.

She glares at him. "I said go, Edward."

He nods and moves five more feet.

Bella growls.

"Okay, okay." Edward checks his rear view mirror and pulls out onto the street. He has one eye on the asphalt and the other on Bella.

She closes her eyes for a few seconds before smiling softly. "I forgot about all the trees," she whispers quietly. "I used to collect leaves when I would take my morning walk around the block."

"What did you do with them?"

"I would put them in a vase on the coffee table until they spoiled."

They make a turn, and Bella reaches over, gripping Edward's thigh.

"Honey, I'm fine. Please watch the road."

Edward nods and turns his gaze back to where it should be.

"The house up here on the left is haunted. At least, I think it is. I remember it going up for rent every other month. Tenants never stayed around for long."

They pass the small house on the left, and sure enough, there's a for rent sign on the front lawn.

"See what I mean?"

"We should contact Ghost Hunters."

"Hmmm. Oh, I wonder if the Pepto Bismol house is still that awful shade of pink. Don't tell me if you know. I want to see for myself when we try this during the day."

Edward beams. She's going to be so happy to see the ugly house on the corner. It's an eyesore in this beautiful neighborhood. He's taking it as a good sign that she's talking about doing this during the day though.

Maybe this was the trick. He doesn't know how he'll ever repay Angela's husband if this is what Bella needed.

They pull back onto their street, and Bella squeezes his leg.

"Can we go one more time?"

"Sugar, I would blow the entire tank of gas and drive you around all night until we're running on fumes if you asked me to."

Bella smiles wide, her white teeth glowing under the streetlamps. She lets go of Edward's leg and taps the horn twice as they pass their house. "Rose is probably watching." She rolls down her window and waves. It's freezing, but she still leaves it down, letting the wind rustle her hair as she breathes in the evening air.

Edward drives Bella around the block eight times before she gets bored and tells him they should call it a night.

Rosalie managed to destroy the cookie dough and one of Bella's good baking sheets. After she hugs the crap out of Bella's neck, she heads home for the night.

Edward opens the kitchen window while Bella heads upstairs.

He opens their bedroom door and finds her sitting at the foot of the bed. "You okay, Sugar?"

"I'm great. I feel so good right now I don't think I can sleep."

She unbuttons her top slowly, her smile widening with each one released.

"Hmm. I guess we could play a game of cards until you get tired," Edward jokes, watching her toss her bra to the floor.

"Unless you're talking about strip poker, I'm not interested. I've missed you, Honey." She holds out her hand. "Come make love to me."

When they're satiated for the night, Edward falls into a deep sleep and doesn't wake up until noon the next day.

He'd probably sleep longer if Bella wasn't poking him in the face and bouncing around like a lunatic.

"Honey, wake up."

"What's going on?" He sits up.

"I want you to take me on a drive. Put some clothes on. Let's go." She throws a pair of jeans at his head and practically skips out the door.

Edward can't get dressed fast enough.

He's finally getting his Sugar back, and he couldn't be happier.

** before everyone starts berating Edward for not calling Zafrina before things got really bad please take into account that Bella was not a danger to herself or anyone else. One of the most important ****things about mental illness is that you cant force someone to get help. Bella would have fallen down the rabbit hole if her choice was taken away from her.**

**can we all squishy hug a fat Rose though? putting aside the excitement of finally finding out the sex of her baby for her friend?**

**also, however will Edward repay Ben for his wonderful advice? (as someone that suffers from agoraphobia and has mini backslides it is easier to get dip your toe back in the water at night than it is during the day because there aren't as many people, the dark can hide a multitude of sins and threats and it's all around more comfortable )**

**See you next week!**


	31. The Hermit 31

**Dear guest reviewer hellbent on destroying my confidence. Feel free to sign in and confront me personally. You might have upset me for a small period of time but for every one of your flames I have dozens of supportive and loving reviews from people brave enough to take responsibility for their words. My army is bigger and better than yours. I doubt you have many friends and I sincerely hope that if you do they aren't witness to your insufferable prejudice. God forbid anyone close to you having any sort of struggle. So climb off that pedestal you seem to have placed yourself on and let's have words.**

**31**

**The Hermit**

As time passes and Bella makes progress one block at a time, first at night and then during the day, Edward starts rewarding her.

It's little things. A bouquet. Her special cookies. Orgasms.

As nice as they all are, she enjoys the latter the most. She's a fiend.

Imagine her surprise when Edward stumbles into the house the day after she makes it eight blocks, carrying a huge sack of flour over his shoulder and a giant box in his arms.

"Honey?"

"Sugar! Can you come untie my shoes? I don't want to track mud through the house."

Bella nods and rushes over, helping him slide out of his work shoes. "What is all this?"

"Your reward ... sort of. Truthfully, I don't know how you'll interpret it."

He leads the way to the kitchen and drops the box on the counter, wincing at the sound of the contents shifting. "I hope I didn't just break the eggs because it's been raining cats and dogs out there, and I really don't want to go back out."

Bella peers over the side of the box and finds enough supplies to do some serious baking. "You brought work home tonight?" she asks, picking up an unlabeled box and opening it. Inside is a collection of professional cookie cutters in all shapes and forms. "I thought you didn't do decorated cookies."

Edward smiles. "We don't, not yet at least."

"Okay?"

"Rosalie and I were talking today, and we think we should add that aspect to the business. We get calls daily, asking if we do custom cookies. Rosalie had the idea that we could utilize your skills until you're ready to join us down at The Bakery as a permanent thing."

Bella's eyes widen.

Edward's never mentioned her joining his business before. "You're doing so well, and I can feel it in my bones, Sugar. You're going to be working alongside me soon. It helps that I start at five in the morning, and we'll have nothing to do with the front of the house. Our deliveries arrive after hours, so aside from the health inspector, you won't be surprised by anyone."

Bella can feel the tingle of anxiety start at the base of her neck, but Edward is quick to calm her.

"We aren't talking about it happening tomorrow, Sugar. When you're ready. Until then, we want to do a home trial run. We got a call for a baby shower today—simple storks, pacifiers, and rattles. They need them the day after tomorrow and know that we can't guarantee product. We'll just take the flack if it doesn't work out."

"Edward."

"I brought you enough stuff for about a thousand cookies, but they only need one hundred and fifty. You aren't disappointing anyone if you aren't up for it, but we should really let the customer know as soon as possible."

Bella smiles and wraps her arms around Edward's neck. "I would love to do this for you and Rose. I would do anything for you, but I have to say you're jumping the gun. Who said I wanted to join you and Rose down at the shop when I'm able to? What if I want to go to school or work at Whole Foods?"

The color drains from Edward's face, and his goofy smile drops.

"I'm kidding, Honey. It sounds like a dream. You know I love to bake. It would be amazing to work beside you." She kisses him and pulls away. "Now, get out of my kitchen. I've got work to do."

Edward changes out of his work clothes and sits at the table, watching Bella work while he plays on his computer.

She takes up most of the table and the entire counter space. Setting up everything methodically and working quickly and efficiently. She wants to make him proud.

The first batch comes out less than perfect. Bella realizes that she forgot the baking powder and dumps the entire thing, starting from scratch. Her skin gets overheated working around the kitchen and underneath Edward's watchful eye, so she asks him to open the back door and grins like a mad woman when the second batch comes out perfectly.

"Yes," she hisses, placing them on the cooling racks on the table.

Edward's hand snakes out to grab a fresh cookie, and she slaps his hand away.

"You can get the rejects."

He pouts and wraps one of his large hands around the back of her thigh, pulling her toward him. "Can you take a break?"

Bella squirms, taking in his dilated pupils and the way he wets his bottom lip with the tip of his tongue.

_How did she live without this for three weeks? _

She wants to give in. To strip him down and ride him in the very chair he's sitting on, but instead, she pulls back, shaking her head.

"I'm not having a quicky in the middle of doing my first professional cookie job. It will have to wait."

"But ..."

"But nothing, Honey. It's not like we could go at it in the pantry down at The Bakery whenever we feel like it, so we should start practicing some self-restraint now."

Edward's frown deepens, and he reaches for his phone.

"What are you doing?"

"Calling the Denali's and telling them we can't fill their order."

"Edward Cullen, don't you dare." Bella snatches his phone out of his hands and puts it in her back pocket. "You're the one who asked me to do this, and now you're acting like a petulant child."

"I didn't realize how sexy it was going to be to watch you in the kitchen."

Bella snorts. "You watch me cook all the time. Come up with something else, yeah?"

"I haven't been inside you in"—Edward checks his watch—"twelve and a half hours, and I need you."

"I'm sorry. This is important to me. Feel free to go upstairs. You know where the lotion is."

Edward glares. "I'm not going to go upstairs and jack off when I have you down here. How much longer?"

"Two hours, maybe more. Go watch a movie and time will move by more quickly. You can order take-out, and then I'll let you turn me into a leopard."

His goofy grin returns, and Edward slams his laptop shut before practically skipping into the living room.

The man and his hickies.

Bella considers asking Zafrina if Edward's obsession could stem from something or maybe he's just really into vampires.

Right now, he's still addicted to anything with zombies, and Bella has seen every episode of "The Walking Dead" as well as the after shows.

She works quietly, baking and cooling the actual cookies before mixing up all the different icing colors she's going to need.

Bella is trying to get the perfect shade of baby blue, considering the baby shower is for a boy, but the food coloring powder Edward brought home refuses to cooperate.

She's never worked with it. It's a little ridiculous if you ask her. She's closing the container and reaching for her gels when the dust slips out of her fingers and a cloud of blue bursts right in her face, filling her lungs. She's still coughing and wiping her face when Edward rounds the corner.

His worried frown turns into an amused smile. "Should we wait for an Oompa Loompa to come take you to the juicer, Violet? You're entirely violet."

Bella flips him off and sips water straight from the tap, scrubbing her face with a dish towel. "You suck."

"Not as good as you do. Speaking of sucking." He wiggles his eyebrows.

She glares at him. "Get out of my kitchen. I have work to do."

"Yes, ma'am. Love you too." He grabs a Coke from the fridge and stalks back to the living room.

Bella cleans the counter and tosses the entire collection of powders back in their box. She's not using that shit anymore, but maybe Edward can find a use for them down at the bakery.

Her gels work just fine, and she's quickly outlining and then flooding each cookie, using toothpicks to get air bubbles and imperfections out of the way when Edward returns to watch her.

"How the fuck do you do that?"

Bella shrugs.

"Alice and I have been doing it for a couple of years now, and I just have a knack for it, I guess."

"Speaking of Alice, have you talked to her?"

Bella frowns. She hasn't seen her sister since before Christmas, and now it's February. Death has struck Jasper's family in quick succession. First his grandfather, and then his grandmother followed closely behind, unable to live without her husband. Alice and Jasper were heading home, waiting for their layover, when they got the call—Jasper's father was killed in a trucking accident. They turned right around and have been staying with his mother during this trying time.

Alice can't give her a date they plan on returning. Everything is up in the air right now.

"She's hanging in there. She wants to come home, but Maria needs them." She turns back to the little baby rattles she's finishing up.

"I couldn't imagine being in Jasper's position."

"Me either, but then again, I don't have any living grandparents or aunts and uncles ... my parents are already dead to me." Bella drops her piping bag in the sink and turns to Edward. "I'm finished. What do you think?"

Edward walks through the kitchen, looking over all of her hard work. "Bella, these are amazing. The Denalis are going to love them."

"Thanks." She bites her lip. "They need to harden for a little while before I can box them."

"I can show you something that's already hard." He stalks toward her. "You're still blue, so I want you upstairs, naked and in the shower in one minute."

"Edward." Bella laughs.

"Fifty-seven. Fifty-six …"

She giggles and stumbles up the stairs, stripping as she goes and flipping the shower on, almost tripping on her pants in her haste.

Edward makes her wait. When he enters the bathroom, his eyes rake over her naked body, head to toe and then back up again. "You've made me wait for hours, you know." He growls.

Bella walks to him and reaches for his shirt. "I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you."

"Hmm." He grips her bare hips while she pushes his pants and boxers off his hips.

His erection springs up, leaking and beautiful.

Bella drops a folded towel on the floor and kneels before him, grabbing both hands and twisting them into her hair.

The pain makes her so hot.

Just like Edward's obsession with hickeys.

They're both a couple of freaks.

Bella runs her tongue along the underside of Edward's cock before popping the leaking tip into her mouth and groaning. She loves giving Edward head. Watching him lose control, thrusting down her throat and pulling at her hair. Coming in her mouth, and then kissing her with so much passion. Fucking her hard and fast until she's losing it all over him.

She's come a long way from the girl who was afraid to hold his hand.

And it's all thanks to him.

"Fuck, Sugar." Edward's grip tightens, and she knows he's close.

She takes him all the way in and hums as she pulls back.

Three …

Two …

One …

Bingo!

Edward comes with a low growl and pulls away before she can clean him off.

He pulls her to her feet, shoves his tongue in her mouth, and pushes her into the shower in quick succession. He recovers in record time, sitting on the bench seat on the far wall and pulling Bella onto his lap.

"Ride me, Sugar," he tells her, pulling her down on top of him with one hard thrust.

"Fuck." Bella gasps.

Edward starts to ask her if she's okay, but she grabs the rack above his head with one hand, something they've added recently, the other finding her clit, and bounces in his lap until she's clamping down on him and screaming his name.

Edward releases inside her with a roar, gripping her hips so tightly she knows he's going to leave bruises.

She'll feel him for days after this. She loves it when he's rough. When he loses control and can't stop himself.

Bella has learned a lot since Edward moved in next door.

One of the most important things is that she's stronger than she'll ever give herself credit for. As she lets go of her painful past and moves on, Bella's life gets better and better with each small step.

And Edward is going to be with her every second of it.

She couldn't be happier.

**This honestly is the last update until Saturday. Happy holidays, friends**


	32. The Hunk 32

**32**

**The Hunk**

"You're absolutely sure about this?" Edward asks as he buttons the chef's jacket he helped Bella shrug into.

His hands might be shaking more than hers are at the moment.

"We have Angela on call just in case it doesn't work out, but I don't want you to feel rushed into this. We don't have to try this today."

Bella straightens her jacket and fixes the collar.

"It's Valentine's Day, Honey. Rose already said that specialty cookies are in high demand. I truly think I'm ready. I'll be so busy I won't have time to obsess about what's happening on the other side of the door. Besides, I have you."

Edward kisses her forehead. He knows that there are times when he isn't enough. He really hopes that today isn't one of them. Just to be safe, he pocketed a bottle of her anxiety medication when she wasn't looking before they left the house. "Promise me you'll say something if it gets to be too much for you. Angela can be here in ten minutes, and I have Zafrina's emergency number on speed dial."

"You're worrying yourself to death. I promise that you'll be the first to know if I start feeling off. I have a good feeling about today though. Let's show 'em what we got, yeah?"

He smiles and lets her go, watching her make herself at home in his, well now it's their kitchen. At least, it will be after today.

If she can pull it off.

Bella deserves this.

That's why he and Rosalie spent hours last night rearranging the kitchen to accommodate the new, larger prep table for Bella with an oven and mixer dedicated just to her work close by. He bought just about every appliance and tool he thought looked remotely useful. He wants to make this transition as smooth as possible for her.

Edward reminds himself that he's also here for a reason and sets up for a day of baking.

"You don't listen to music or anything?"

"I usually just pop my earbuds in, but we have a small speaker by the back door. Have at it." He points in that direction.

Edward's work halts when the beginning of Bella's _Smexy Songs_ playlist starts.

"Sugar," he warns.

"Honey." She smiles and goes back to work, swinging her hips back and forth to a sensual beat.

Edward is bound and determined not to embarrass himself in front of Bella, seeing as it's their first time working together. He will not burn anything in her presence. He won't.

While Edward focuses on his work and not on his girlfriend's delectable ass, she's busy perfecting hundreds of heart-shaped, lovey-dovey cookies perfect for the romantic holiday.

Bella is Edward's first serious relationship, but she isn't his first Valentine. He's had a few commonplace girlfriends in his past, but his presents were always the cliche roses and romantic dinner. He'd get laid, or he'd leave them at their front door with a simple kiss.

Edward was even dumped once for his lack of enthusiasm for the Hallmark holiday.

But with Bella, he finds himself striving for perfection. He wants to give her the world, and what with it being their first, it has to be special. Bella mentioned that she just wants a home-cooked meal and a couple hours in bed doing anything but sleeping.

He's created a monster, and he has zero regrets.

"Edward, your timer is going off," she yells over the loud beeping.

He notices that she's already plating cookies and boxing some for quick sale. She's made a majority of the pre-boxed ones look like conversation hearts. She's too adorable for her own good.

He's pretty behind schedule. Rosalie is going to give him so much shit when she gets here.

Bella finishes and sets the remaining dough in the walk-in before she offers to help Edward catch up.

They're working side by side when Rosalie pops her head into the kitchen. "Sup, bitches?"

Bella rolls her eyes.

"I wouldn't be surprised if Kat's first word is 'fucktastic' at this point."

Edward chuckles and hip checks her.

"It's a good thing she'll have you as a good example."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to give birth to a hellraiser. Bella, I was wondering if I could get your help for a second, out front, before we open."

Bella gives Edward an apprehensive look, and he tells her that he can manage on his own until she returns.

All he can hear is laughter from the front of the house, followed by a gasp, the sound of skin slapping skin, and more laughter. He's about to check and see what they're doing when Bella bursts through the door, red-faced, and her mouth is covered in red lipstick.

It's the same shade his sister is wearing.

"Honey, I just hit a pregnant woman." Bella giggles as she walks to the sink.

"Wait, what?"

"I told Bella since it was obvious I wasn't going to have a Valentine this year that you could share, and I laid one on her." Rosalie shrugs, reaching for some paper towels to wipe her smeared lipstick off. "Thought I'd break the ice and get her started on a good note before I unlock the doors, but she slapped me."

When Bella's face is clean, she stands straight and looks Rosalie square in the eye. "These lips." She points to her mouth. "They have been all over every inch of that." She points to Edward. "Think about that the next time you decide to stick your tongue down my throat."

Now Rosalie is gagging and rushing for the exit, and Edward is pissed.

"You shoved your tongue down my girlfriend's throat?" He growls before she can escape.

"Yeah, just this morning I was deep throating him in the shower." Bella turns to him. "Was that before or after I brushed my teeth."

Rosalie barely makes it to the trash can by the swinging doors.

Bella's laughing so hard she's holding onto Edward for support, and he can't help but join her.

"You guys suck," Rosalie croaks. "It was a small joke, and you turned it into something weird and disgusting. Ugh, I think I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die. Well, you might if you keep kissing my girlfriend. Pregnant or not," Edward threatens jokingly.

His sister rinses her mouth out and tells them they'll be opening in five, so they plate everything up and pass the trays through the door.

Bella makes it through most of the day without incident.

Suddenly, out of nowhere she found herself overwhelmed, and Edward made her sit down in the office until her medication could take effect. He thought she would be mad that he brought them, but instead, she was grateful.

She took her break and returned to the kitchen ready for more.

Rosalie is scarce after her joke gone wrong, and besides that one hiccup, the day went better than he thought it would.

Bella's cookies flew off the shelves, and they got several special orders for the coming week.

They offer to clean up so the pregnant one can go home and relax. She leaves with parting words that having sex in the bakery is strictly forbidden, given that it would commit many health code violations.

Edward works quickly so they can start their own celebration.

First stop, home, where he forces Bella into the shower and loves her until she's in a boneless state of relaxation.

While she naps, he prepares a fancy dinner complete with tiramisu for dessert.

Yeah, he's pulling out all the stops with this one.

Bella's groggy and resists his attempts to wake her when everything is finished, so Edward takes drastic measures and dives under the covers. He doesn't stop until she's screaming and begging for it.

"Hmm." She attempts to flatten her messy bed hair. "Can every day be Valentine's Day?"

He chuckles and climbs up her body, pulling his sweats down and entering her with one quick thrust. "We haven't even started. This is just your reward for making it through the day."

Bella cries out, wrapping her legs and arms around him. "Give it to me, Honey," she whispers, licking his top lip and moaning at the taste of herself that's left there.

"You don't want it soft and sweet?" he asks, pounding into her a few times, knowing she wouldn't ask for something she didn't want.

Bella shakes her head. "No. Watching you in the kitchen today was the worst form of foreplay ever because I couldn't do anything about it." She meets his thrusts, gasping each time his body becomes flush with hers. "We can do soft and sweet later. Right now, I want feral Edward to come out and play. Please."

"How many times do I have to tell you, Sugar? You never have to beg for my love."

Before she can reply, he grabs her left leg, throwing it over his shoulder, and starts a fast pace until Bella's gripping the headboard to keep herself from being pushed through it.

She tells him how much she loves it. The pain and the pleasure mixed together.

Edward bites her neck and sucks until he knows there will be dark marks for days. He loves the taste of her skin almost as much as he loves seeing her marked. And now he can leave as many as he wants with the excuse that the collar of her chef's jacket will keep them concealed.

"Fuck. Honey." Bella cries.

"I'm trying," he jokes, grabbing one of her hands and placing it on her clit. "Help me out, Sugar."

Bella's fingers work quickly until she lets go and runs her nails down his back with one, long drawn-out moan.

Edward rocks into her body a few times before he stills and empties deep inside her.

They catch their breath, forehead to forehead, and maintain eye contact.

"I love you, Sugar."

"I love you too, Honey." She stretches like a milk-happy cat. "I feel like my body is made of Jello. Hmmm. I need another nap."

Edward contemplates giving her what she wants, but he has plans that don't involve sleeping the rest of the day away.

"I made dinner and your favorite dessert."

"You're my favorite dessert." She squeezes her tits together and gives a residual moan.

Edward grabs her sweater dress and pulls it over her head, kissing both nipples, her belly button, and right above her sex before covering everything up.

"You can wear just this, and if you behave, I'll give you your gift after dinner." He smooths the fabric down her backside, giving her ass a few hearty squeezes.

Bella bites back a moan.

"Gifts? I thought we'd just go at it like bunnies. I didn't get you anything." She pouts.

"I think this gift will benefit both of us. I bought them when Em and I were out Christmas shopping. When I stepped into the changing room, I got so much shit when I came out, but I think it'll be worth it."

Bella's eyes widen.

"You've been hiding a present for two months?"

He nods.

"You never go in the guest room, so it was easy to find a hiding spot." He kisses her nose and pulls her out the door. "Let's go eat."

She follows him willingly, her stomach growling as they make their way down the stairs.

Edward prepared her favorite meal. Pesto chicken pasta, homemade garlic bread, and an Italian salad. He's pulled out her fancy and folded linen napkins, and her best stemware and filled them with chilled cola.

"It looks great," Bella says without taking her eyes off the gift-wrapped box. "Why can't I open my present now?"

"Because the food will get cold, and I spent a lot of time on it while you slept. Have a little patience, Sugar."

She sticks her tongue out at him, and he fights the urge to suck it into his mouth. Instead, he holds her chair out for her and lays her napkin in her lap, running his hand across the bare skin of her thighs as he moves.

"Honey," Bella warns, her legs opening of their own accord.

"Just making sure you're comfortable."

She shakes her head and waits for him to take his seat.

Edward makes a cheesy toast filled with promises that they'll spend the next hundred Valentine's Days just like this. "At least, until we have kids. Then things might get a little tricky."

Bella chokes on a piece of chicken, reaching for her drink and swallowing hard.

"You want that? With me?" she asks in disbelief. "I mean, with everything?"

"Bella, how many times am I going to have to tell you that you're it for me? Seriously, I'm not going anywhere, and you're already working down at The Bakery. Yes, I want that. I want everything with you. Marriage, kids, and a pet or two. In time, you know. We're in no rush. Do you think that might be something you'd like?"

Why are they talking about such heavy topics right now? Edward will never know. He just hopes that speaking his thoughts won't cause Bella to recoil. He wants her to know how he feels.

Bella ponders his words for a bit, stirring her chicken around the plate and adjusting her glass until the place setting in front of her is perfect. "I would love to have that life with you, Edward. It sounds perfect." She gives him a hesitant smile. "But I'd like to hold off on the kid talk until I can safely walk into a hospital on my own. I mean, that would make all kinds of things difficult if I got pregnant right now, you know?"

Edward nods, his goofy grin out in full force.

She wants to marry him in the future. Bella Swan wants to have babies with him at some point.

His day, week, his month maybe even year has been made.

He presents their dessert, and Bella eats a small piece, stating that it's really rich, but she's also eyeing the shirt box with determined curiosity.

"So what's my present."

Edward's ears start to warm.

He bought the gift on a whim and chickened out giving it to her as a Christmas gift. Thinking back, he knows she probably wasn't ready for something like this anyways. She has confidence issues but also turns into a spitfire in the bedroom so this could go one way or another.

"Honey?"

"Oh. You can open it if you want. Upstairs. In the bathroom. What you choose to do with it is totally up to you." He begins cleaning the table up. "I'll take care of everything down here."

Bella nods, snatches the box up, and rushes up the stairs.

Edward focuses on the sounds coming from upstairs while he loads the dishwasher, but it's radio silence.

He checks the windows and doors before climbing the stairs to find Bella.


	33. The Hermit 33

**Sorry for the delay**

**33**

**The Hermit**

Bella sits down heavily on the toilet seat. The fabric is itchy but not entirely uncomfortable. She even tells herself that she looks beautiful and that Edward won't know what hit him when he joins her. He finds her attractive without any clothes on, so she's sure that the burgundy lace nighty he bought her will be a big hit. It's the smaller part of the gift that's thrown her off.

She twists the end and jumps when it starts vibrating powerfully. She isn't stupid; she knows what it is. It's the _why_ that's got her stumped. Does Edward not think that he's enough to please her? Because that couldn't be further from the truth. She turns the vibrator off and sets it in her lap. She's puzzled.

Edward knocks on the open door softly, causing her to jump and the toy to slowly roll down her thighs.

"Um," she mumbles, catching it before it can fall to the floor.

"Everything okay in here?" he asks, taking in her dress. "Looks good on you. Why don't you stand up and do a spin for me."

Bella never wears thongs, so she's uncomfortable with the fabric stuck between her cheeks. She fights the urge to pull at it, stands, and does a slow twirl. The fabric of the nighty swings around with her movements.

"Damn, Sugar. You look even better than I pictured."

Her cheeks flame. She still isn't used to the constant compliments. With Edward, that's all she gets.

Bella holds up the small sex toy and presses the pedal on the trashcan to make the lid open. "We don't need this. You're more than enough for me, Honey."

He springs into action and snatches it out of her hand before it can land in the garbage. "I think you'll like what I have planned for you." He holds out his hand and leads her to the bedroom. "I know I will."

He tosses the toy on the bed and reaches for her. Edward's hands wander over the lace fabric and then underneath, pulling the thong down her legs.

Bella tries to sit down, but Edward holds her steady and shakes his head; one hand reaches out and grabs the vibrator. "We're spectacular in the bedroom but this"—he holds it up—"is going to be mind blowing. Trust me?"

Bella bites her bottom lip and nods silently.

Edward twists the end all the way, and she jumps at the loud hum.

"Shh. Calm down. I'd never do anything that would hurt you unless you asked me to." He runs the toy across her sensitive nipples, leaving a trail down her sensitive skin and stopping right before her clit.

"I love you, Sugar." He smiles.

"I love you too."

Edward presses the vibrator against Bella's clit at the same time he shoves three fingers deep inside her, curling them expertly.

Bella's legs give out on the spot, and she gives a surprised squeak when her knees hit the floor.

"EDWARD!" she screams, falling apart before her mind can catch up with what is happening.

He is relentless, bringing her over the edge three more times before he lets her go.

Bella's knees are sporting some serious rug burn, and her clit is throbbing.

When Edward stands up and tries to help her onto the bed, Bella swats his hands away and reaches for the tie on his pants, yanking them down to his knees and swallowing him in one go.

Edward gives a choked groan, his head thrown back as he bucks into her mouth. She plays with his balls and hums in all the right places, hoping to give him at least an ounce of the pleasure he's just given her.

Her insides are still quivering. That toy is definitely a keeper.

"Bella," Edward warns.

She hums in reply and swallows everything he has to give her before releasing him with a pop.

Edward must see her struggling to find her legs because he helps her onto the bed, both of them collapsing and staring at the ceiling.

"That was amazing," she says breathily.

Edward wraps his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close. "I told you."

"Yeah, you did." She sighs.

They chat back and forth. Edward tells her the story of how he took the lingerie into the dressing room at the sex shop to be able to hear her better, and that when he exited, no cashier or customer would look him in the eye.

"That must have been embarrassing."

"Nah, it's the twenty-first century. People need to get over their shit. So what if I like wearing ladies undergarments."

Bella leans up and gives him a questioning smirk.

"I do not enjoy wearing lingerie, Sugar. Lay back down, you freak."

She giggles against his chest. "Just making sure."

Eventually, their breathing evens out, and they fall into an easy sleep.

Bella and Edward have shared a handful of holidays together, and while they've all been special in their own way, Valentine's Day is definitely in her top three.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

It's Bella's fourth shift at The Bakery, and things are going great.

She's currently working on an order for a birthday party where dinosaurs are the theme, and she finds herself having fun with the bright, almost neon icing colors she's using. The song playing in the background makes her smile as she lines and floods cookies. Giving each one a unique flaw.

No kid at this party will have the same cookie as another.

Edward makes his way over to her prep table, resting his chin on her shoulder as she works. "You have to teach me how to do this." He waves his hand toward the cookies.

"Nah. If I teach you how, then you won't have any use for me." Her nose crinkles when she smiles.

Edward's hand snakes down her side, and he gives her backside a hearty squeeze. "I could always keep you chained to the bed as my sex slave." He kisses her neck, and Bella destroys the triceratops.

"Honey, we talked about this. No horny talk in the kitchen, or I'll have no choice but to drag you out back to your car and have my wicked way with you in broad daylight."

"Promise?"

Bella ignores him and goes back to her job.

Rose and the part-time cashier, Irina, decide to do the cleanup after hours.

Edward pulls Bella onto his lap, and the two make out while the car warms up.

"Gah. I miss those lips when we're working." Bella gasps, resting her forehead against his.

"All you have to do is lean over and kiss me. It's really simple." He chuckles, squeezing her ass. "I have to go get some groceries and essentials before Alice and Jasper come over tonight, so I'll drop you off at home and head out. I forgot the list."

"Well"—Bella reaches into her coat pocket and produces a bottle of pills and the shopping list—"I was thinking. It's still early, so the store shouldn't be too crowded. What if I took a pill and tried going in with you?"

"Really?"

Bella bites her lip and nods. "I want to try."

"Okay."

She climbs off his lap and puts her seat belt on.

It isn't until Edward pulls into a relatively crowded parking lot that Bella loses all bravado. She doesn't want to disappoint Edward, but she reaches for the handle and slams her hand down on the lock instead of opening the door. "I can't. It's too busy. I'll just stay here. With the doors locked. Where it's safe."

Edward nods and caresses her cheek. "It's okay, Sugar. Maybe we'll come back at night when it's deserted."

He offers to take her home and come back, but she assures him that it will be okay.

Bella watches him disappear inside the store and turns her attention to the people walking past the car. Not one person gives her so much as a second glance. A mom is holding onto her son's hand tightly while he tries pulling away. A teenager rushes through the lot, tearing into a CD package, leaving cellophane in his wake. An elderly couple walks slowly to their tiny compact car and the man opens holds the door open for his wife, kissing her before she sits down. None of these people stop and stare at the girl in the SUV, openly watching them as they pass. Maybe Alice was right, people are so busy with their own lives they don't have the time to judge her. She's about to reach for the lock on the door when a winded Edward practically crashes into it.

He loads the groceries and pulls her door open, checking her over. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, Honey. I just sat here people watching. Calm down."

He frowns and squeezes her hands. "You're shaking, Sugar."

"Xanax isn't a magic cure. It just takes the edge off. I'm okay. Let's go home. I'm making Alice's favorite for dinner."

Edward nods.

Alice and Bella hug for a good five minutes straight when she and Jasper show up. Bella has missed her sister. She loves Rose but Alice is irreplaceable.

"I missed you," Bella cries. "So much. We have so much to catch up on. I can't wait to introduce you to Rose. You're going to love her."

Alice smiles sadly and pulls Bella down beside her on the couch. "We need to talk, Bells."

Nerves take over, and Bella knows that nothing good can come from those words.

She's right.


	34. The Hunk 34

**34**

**The Hunk**

Edward watches Bella stumble out of the room and waits for the faint sound of the bedroom door shutting before turning to Alice.

He's angry. "How could you just drop a bomb like that without contacting me first?"

"Edward—"

He cuts her off. "I could have at least tried to prepare her for this."

"I'm sorry—"

He scoffs. "She's been doing so well, Alice. You might have just ruined all the progress she's made."

Jasper wraps his arm around his fiancée. "My mother is in a bad way, but she won't leave San Antonio. She needs us."

"Bella needs you," Edward snaps.

"She has you," Alice whispers.

He has to take a few calming breaths before he replies, and still, his voice is laced with venom. "You're stupid if you think I can replace you."

Jasper warns him to cool it.

"No. I won't. Bella has been doing so well because she knew you were eventually coming back." He stands up. "I think it's time for you to go now."

"But—"

"I don't know what I'm going to find up there. I do know that she isn't going to come back down if you're still here."

He walks the couple out, and Alice stops him before he can close the door.

"I am sorry, Edward. I've been trying to tell her for weeks, but I kept putting it off. This isn't easy for me, and I didn't want to upset her."

Upset her? "You could have gone about this in an entirely different way. If she's up to it, I'll have her call you tomorrow."

"Thank you."

"I'm not promising anything, Alice." He shuts the door in her face and takes a moment to prepare for what he's going to find but can't seem to make it up the stairs. Edward chooses to give Bella some space while he cleans up their dinner.

He's loading the dishwasher when she resurfaces.

Her damp hair hangs loosely down her back, and she's smiling but it doesn't reach her bloodshot eyes. In her hands are the clothes she was wearing before they were both completely blindsided by her sister's news. They're waterlogged and dripping on the floor.

Edward knows he has to approach cautiously. He closes the dishwasher and turns to her with a playful scowl. "You showered without me."

"I'm sorry." She drops the soggy clothes in the sink and wraps her arms around his neck. "I didn't know what else to do."

Edward rubs her back and peppers her face with kisses. "I guess you'll have to make it up to me." He takes in her jeans and sweater. "Why aren't you dressed for bed?"

"Because we have plans tonight. I'm not going to Walmart in my pajamas, no matter how late it is."

Edward squeezes her. "We can do that another night."

Bella shakes her head and steps out of his embrace. "We've been planning this for days. I want to go now."

"Sugar—"

"I want to go now," she stresses. "Move it, or I'm going to call Rose and see if she wants to take me."

He knows she wouldn't actually call his sister. Rosalie is great, but Bella hasn't left the house without him.

Apprehensively, Edward watches her bundle up and follows her out the door.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

If she's upset about her sister leaving, Bella doesn't show it. It's unnerving how blase she is on the subject. She's like a kid in a candy store as she walks the aisles, tossing random items in the cart.

"Won't Kat look so cute in this onesie?" she asks. "I'm going to get it in two sizes so she can grow into the other one."

He chuckles as she pilfers through the racks, pouting when she can't find a duplicate in a bigger size.

"They restock at night, so we'll have to come back and check."

"Ooh. Look at these little booties. They have butterflies on them."

The pack of booties joins the mountain of baby clothes she's picked out along with the new bath towels and coffee maker Edward didn't know they needed. He can't find it in him to argue that their Mr. Coffee is practically brand new and barely used because he loves the excited smile plastered on her face. He'll happily allow Bella to have her crazy shopping spree if it means she isn't wallowing about her sister's impending move.

Edward is still pissed at Alice's approach and more so after hearing that she and Jasper have known about it for weeks. Deep down he knows they've got a lot going on but his allegiance is with Bella.

Always.

"Edward?"

"Yeah, Sugar?"

"I think I'm ready to go home. We've got work tomorrow, and it's getting late."

He nods and leads the way to the cash registers.

The drive home is quiet and Bella doesn't talk until he's turned off the engine.

"We didn't get anything perishable, so we can wait until tomorrow to bring everything inside." Bella yawns. "I need to get that massive order for the pharmacy retirement party started, and I haven't even made the cookie cutters yet."

Because she was so excited for her sister's return, she couldn't focus on anything else.

Swallowing the anger, he follows her up the stairs.

"We'll go in early, and I'll help you." He kisses her softly. "I'm going to hop in the shower. I won't be long. Try to get some sleep."

Bella nods.

Edward lets the hot water soothe his aching muscles and can feel the stress of the day slowly melt away.

He's rubbing his head with a towel as he walks into the bedroom and finds Bella under the covers and sound asleep, so he quietly slides into bed and reaches for her. His hand meets bare skin, and his beautiful girl turns until they're facing each other. "Sugar, why are you naked?"

"You told me I owed you one for showering without you, and my trip to Walmart was a success. I'd like my reward now."

He chuckles and lets her push his boxers down. Edward groans as she wraps her hand around him. "How would you like your reward?" he questions.

She hums thoughtfully for a second, her hand never stilling, stroking him at a slow pace that drives him insane with need. "You on top. Hard and fast, so we can actually get some sleep."

With a laugh, Edward rolls until he's nestled between her thighs. "I think I can handle that." He grabs her hands and places them on the headboard. "You better hold on."

Bella's giggles are cut short by a long, drawn-out moan when he thrusts inside her as deep as he can with just the right amount of power.

"Honey," she cries.

When Bella deems herself thoroughly rewarded, and Edward is spent, he wraps her up in his arms.

"I love you, Sugar."

She whispers her love for him.

Edward wakes up in the middle of the night to find the spot next to him cold and empty. After checking the bathroom, he heads downstairs in search of Bella, stopping short when he finds her on the couch, sobbing into a throw pillow in an effort to keep quiet.

"Bella," he whispers.

"Why does everyone leave?"


	35. The Hermit 35

**35**

**The Hermit**

Bella thought she had experienced great pain before, but this is different. Everything hurts in a bone-deep, constantly aching way. Maybe she is just as fragile as Edward treats her.

"I feel like I'm letting everyone down," she cries.

Bella can't remember a time when she wasn't crying. She doesn't need her chapped lips and the way her dry skin stretches every time she moves to know that she's dehydrated.

"I've been waiting for this, you know? That other shoe to drop. They're going to realize how crazy and unstable I am."

"Bella, you are not crazy," Zafrina insists. "You've come such a long way from the girl who was afraid of her own shadow. You should be proud."

Bella scoffs. "Every single hurdle I've managed to jump over since Edward moved in next door is back up and stronger than ever. I can't leave the house anymore, and I'm on a constant regimen to try to keep the panic attacks under control." She sobs. "It doesn't work though. I'm always on edge. That's why I asked him to call you."

"I wish you would have contacted me sooner, but I'm glad you did. We'll talk about changing your medication before I go. Right now, I'd like to talk about the guilt you're carrying."

"Rose and Edward had to cancel my cookie orders indefinitely. I was just starting to find my footing, and it all went up in flames. Clients were relying on me. They were relying on me, and I failed them." She sniffs. "I refused to see Alice before she and Jasper went back to Texas, and I know that hurt her."

"That's all understandable, considering Alice's abrupt decision to move. You're allowed to have feelings, Bella."

"Edward's going to leave me."

"What makes you think that? Has he said or done anything to insinuate he plans on leaving?"

Bella shakes her head and tries to swallow the lump in her throat. "He doesn't have to say it. I can see it in his eyes every time he looks at me. He's trying to find a way out just like Alice did, and I can't blame him for it."

"You're paranoia is getting the best of you. Alice didn't abandon you, and from what you've told me about her, I'd imagine this is just as hard on her as it is for you. Your sister will always be a phone call or a flight away."

"Edward tells me that he loves me and that he isn't going anywhere."

"But you don't believe him."

Bella hugs a pillow to her chest, hoping it will soothe the ache in her heart. "Eventually, he's going to realize that he deserves so much better than a broken recluse. I wouldn't blame him if he left."

Zafrina sets her notebook aside and reaches for Bella's hand. "Imagine if the roles were reversed. Would you leave Edward if he had a little setback?"

"This isn't little, Zafrina," Bella croaks.

"Answer the question."

"No. I love him. But it's not the same."

"How so?"

Bella struggles to find a reason but comes up short. "I don't know."

"The next time you question him just think about being in his shoes. Edward loves you, and he knows that right now you're hurting. Does it affect him? Yes, but that's to be expected, considering being in a relationship takes a lot of work. Sometimes, the weight is shifted, and someone has to take on more than their fair share, but that's love, Bella."

"I feel like he's always taking the brunt."

"Do you remember when Edward came home after his fight with his sister over changing the plans you'd made for Christmas?"

Bella nods.

"So you remember how he came to you, of all people, for love and support. Despite the fact that he scared you, you were still able to give him what he needed and let him lean on you without question."

"I suppose."

"He knew what he was getting into, Bella. Edward doesn't seem like the kind of guy who would waste his time or yours if he wasn't planning on sticking around."

Bella yawns into the back of her hand. "I'm sorry. I don't understand how I can be so tired when all I do is sleep."

"You've had a lot on your mind. You can sleep for days and still be exhausted." Zafrina checks her watch. "I have an appointment, but if you need me, I can call and reschedule."

"No. I'll be fine."

Bella's grateful that Zafrina doesn't push.

Instead, she pulls out her prescription pad. "I'd like to switch out your Xanax for Klonopin, and we're going to try Zoloft again. I'm also prescribing you a mild sleeping pill, but I need you to promise me something."

Bella nods.

"I need you to promise me that you'll call my cell if you feel even the slightest bit off. It's going to take some time for the anti-depressants to work, so I want to hear if there are any major highs or lows."

"Okay."

"I'd also like to put Edward in charge of your medication."

"Zafrina, I'm not suicidal."

"I know, Bella. The thing about sleeping pills on top of anxiety medication is that you can easily get confused and forget whether you've already taken a dose. It's just a precaution."

Bella nods.

"I'll drop these by the pharmacy when I leave, and Edward can pick them up when he gets off work."

"Thank you. So much."

"You're very welcome. I think it would be best if I put you down for weekly appointments for a while."

Bella watches her thumb through her calendar.

"Next Wednesday at three o'clock?"

"I'll be here," Bella mutters.

She follows Zafrina to the door but stands away from the threshold.

"This setback doesn't make you weak, Bella. I want you to try to accept support from your loved ones. Talk to Edward and voice your feelings instead of trying to bottle them up. Journaling might help as well."

"Okay." Bella sighs.

She waits until the woman is gone and engages all the locks.

Edward asked her to let him know when Zafrina left, so Bella grabs her phone and heads upstairs.

_Can you please pick up my medications on the way home?_

His response is instantaneous, and Bella swallows the guilt that he's probably been watching his phone, waiting for her to text.

_**Of course, Sugar. Are you feeling better?**_

_A little. I'll see you when you get home_

_**I love you**_

Bella's eyes fill with tears.

She can't remember the last time she told Edward that she loves him.

_I love you so much_

_Feel free to leave work early_

_**I'll call Angela and stop by the pharmacy**_

Knowing that Edward hasn't been eating because of the stress she's caused, Bella decides to cook him dinner. Wanting to apologize for the hell she's put him through, food seems like a good place to start.

Bella's just put Edward's favorite soup on to boil when the front door opens.

"Sugar?"

"Kitchen."

He rounds the corner with a giant bouquet, a bag from the pharmacy, and a hopeful smile.

She can't help but jump in his arms, not caring about the beautiful flowers.

"I've missed you, Sugar."

Instead of guilt, Bella feels loved and cared for.

"I've missed you too."

Bella knows she has an uphill battle ahead of her, but she'll worry about that tomorrow.


	36. The Hunk 36

**36**

**The Hunk**

Edward is heartbroken when Bella finally opens up to him.

He knew she was having a difficult time, but to hear that she was questioning his love after everything they've been through is still a hard pill to swallow. He doesn't know what else he can do to convince her that he isn't going anywhere.

She apologizes over and over again, growing to the point of hysterics when she realizes that he's crying. "I've hurt you."

"I'm okay," he chokes out.

"No, you aren't. We have to be honest with each other."

"I hate seeing you in pain, Sugar. I know this has been hard on you, but it isn't any easier on me having to watch you go through this."

"I'm sorry. I know I'm not making this easy on you, and I know it doesn't feel like it, but I am trying, Honey. Neglect and abandonment are all I've ever known before I met you. I had no one besides my sister and was completely blindsided by her news." She cries. "I know I can survive her move as long as I have you. Doubt crept in, and I'm sorry, Edward. So sorry."

"You could have talked to me. I would have done everything in my power to reassure you that I'm here to stay." Edward kisses her softly. "Nothing could make me leave, aside from you telling me to go and meaning it."

"Zafrina helped me see that. If the roles were reversed, I would do anything to prove to you that I love you, and I'm not going anywhere." She caresses the side of his face. "I will never not want you, Edward."

Edward tries to swallow a sob, but it bubbles out of him. "I will never not want you either, but it's killing me, Sugar. It's killing me to know that there's still a part of you that doubts my loyalty. I don't know how else to prove it to you."

"You prove it to me every day." Bella sighs. "I'm just waiting for you to realize that you can do so much better. I feel like our relationship is one-sided the majority of the time. You're constantly having to deal with my drama."

"I love you and all the baggage you carry."

"I know. That part of me was practically nonexistent, but after everything with Alice, it got overwhelming, and I couldn't fight it no matter how hard I tried."

Edward squeezes her tightly.

"I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. That I didn't think to call Zafrina before things got awful."

"I don't know what would have happened if you had called her before I was ready. I needed to decide that for myself."

"It's selfish of me to wish that you didn't need to see her at all. That I could be enough for you." Edward sniffs. "But I know it's not possible for me to be everything you need all the time."

"Thank you for understanding. I love you, Honey."

"Forever. I will love you forever and then some. The next time you feel a hint of doubt, come to me, and we'll work through it together."

"I will. I promise."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

It's hours later, after the tears have finally subsided, and they've showered before falling into bed that Edward remembers what transpired when he got to work this morning. He squeezes Bella tight. "Guess what I walked in on today."

She hums.

She took a sleeping pill before they showered, and he can tell she's trying hard to fight it. He could wait to share the news with her until tomorrow, but it's eating him alive. He has to tell someone. "Do you remember Irina?"

Bella laughs. "Short-term memory loss isn't a side effect of a depression slump, Honey. Irina is one of the part-time cashiers? What about her?"

"She's going to school for a degree in business and offered to look over the books for us until we can find a reputable accountant."

"Okay."

"So, I stopped by the office to check on things, and imagine my surprise when I found my sister sitting on her lap, trying her hardest to suck the air out of the poor girl's lungs."

Bella gasps and sits up. "No way."

"Yes, way. Apparently, it's been going on for a couple months, but they've been keeping it a secret."

"I can't believe it."

"Believe it. My pregnant sister is dating an employee."

"That's not it," Bella slurs and snuggles back into his chest. "She's totally moved on and forgot about me and our plan to raise Kat together."

Edward laughs. "Go to sleep, weirdo."

"Love you, Honey."

She's asleep before Edward can reply.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

No one expects Bella to bounce back right after her first appointment with Zafrina. It takes time for them to find a good cocktail and then even longer for the medication to settle.

Edward makes it a point to prove that he's there, supporting her every step of the way.

And when the doubt starts to creep in, he doesn't rest until she knows that they're going to get through it together. Because without a doubt, Edward knows they can do anything as long as they have each other.

After a couple of one-on-one meetings with Zafrina, Bella brings up the possibility of him sitting in on one. Their makeshift couple's therapy session is painful. Especially when both women insist that Edward shouldn't hold back, and the dam finally opens.

He voices his thoughts, his own struggles, and his fear that Bella will always question his love for her.

Bella spends the majority of the three days following their session in bed until she's able to climb out of the hole she buried herself in.

Finally, after a lot of discussions and another session with Zafrina, they're both able to walk away from the experience, feeling lighter than they have in ages.

When Zafrina decides that it's time to change Bella's appointments from weekly to biweekly, the couple celebrates by inviting Rosalie and Irina over for formal introductions.

It's been months since Rosalie's divorce has been final, her baby is due in just a couple months, and Edward has never seen his sister as happy as she is right now.

Irina is smart and funny. She takes all of Rosalie's shit and returns it ten-fold. They were made for one another.

Bella starts to come out of her shell a little, regaling the tales of Rosalie's attempt to win her heart. She includes the Valentine's Day prank that backfired, and Irina hisses.

"We've been together since early January." Irina glares at Rosalie. "You mean to tell me that you kissed another woman?"

"I was just having a little fun and wanted to brighten her first day at The Bakery." Rosalie grabs her hand. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't love Bella, but joking aside, it's completely familial. She's practically my sister."

Irina huffs, but Edward can tell that she isn't seriously mad.

"RiRi. You know I'm in love with you," Rosalie coos and the woman melts.

Bella laughs.

"So, I'm guessing the theme for the nursery is still going to be rainbows?"


	37. The Hermit 37

**37**

**The Hermit**

Joking aside, Rose decides to take a more conventional route when it comes to decorating the nursery for Kat. Nothing too frilly or overly girly. Her one stipulation is that they keep the pink to a bare minimum.

"My daughter isn't going to be a pretty, pretty princess. She's going to be a strong, independent woman," she insists despite Esme's pleas via webcam.

While everyone is at work, Bella, who has finally worked up the courage, is next door painting the walls a soft buttery yellow that matches The Bakery decor. Bella loves a good project and immerses herself in perfecting the trim and paint strokes. She doesn't worry about the stress or the strained conversation she had with her sister the night before. Bella doesn't obsess over her next session with Zafrina or the homework assignment that her psychiatrist will most likely give her in an effort to help with the progress she's slowly making. Instead, she focuses on the job at hand and plans out where the cute bakery-themed paintings will hang when they arrive.

The only furniture that's been decided on for the room is the crib that Esme sent a couple of weeks ago. Bella thinks it's sweet that both Rose and Edward used the cradle when they were babies. There are dings in the mahogany and bite marks on the bars from years of memories. The Cullen family is very sentimental in that achingly sweet kind of way.

"You missed a spot."

Bella, having thought she was alone in the house, screams in terror and attacks the intruder with the only weapon at hand—the wet end of her paintbrush before she realizes who it is.

"Oh, no." She laughs.

Edward looks down at his paint-covered shirt and wipes at his face with a playful scowl. "Is that any way to greet your one and only, Sugar?"

Bella snorts and hands him a rag. "This is all your fault. You should know better than to sneak up on me like that. What are you doing home so early?"

Edward reaches out and places a yellow handprint right over her breast before stepping back to admire his work. "There's a major power outage in town. We waited an hour and decided to call it an early night."

"You didn't think to call and let me know?"

He chuckles darkly. "Where would the fun be in that?" Edward smirks and reaches out to give her other breast the same paint job, but Bella swats him away.

"Psh. Go away. I'm busy."

"No. Are you almost finished?"

Bella points to the two bare walls. "Far from it actually."

"I think you should wrap it up for the night," Edward insists.

"Honey, your sister has been staying at Irina's for days. I should get this done so she can come back home."

Bella knows that while Edward can't argue that, Rose is having a rough time living with a house full of college students even if it is kind of her fault. Pregnant women and partiers don't have much in common. Irina's roommates are driving the poor girl up the wall. Bella offered the guest room up but Rose declined hence Edward's belief that his sister asked for it.

"I need to finish so that everything will dry, the fumes will dissipate, and she can come back."

"One more day won't kill her. Let's finish this wall and have a date night."

"A date night?"

Edward gives her a goofy grin. "I haven't properly wooed my girlfriend in ages. Let me knock your socks off." He looks down at her bare feet. "Or at least your pants."

Bella laughs. "More romantic words have never been spoken. Seriously, I'm swooning so hard right now." She rolls her eyes and goes back to painting.

"Come on, Sugar. Let's have a romantic night. Just the two of us," Edward pleads. "I picked up a vat of hummus just for the occasion."

"Don't make me pull the vegetarian cookbook back out."

Edward snatches the paintbrush out of her hands. "I destroyed that thing ages ago, so good luck with that."

"There's always Pinterest," Bella sings.

"I ordered Chinese and got you pot stickers."

Bella throws her arms around his neck. "You had me at Chinese. Let's blow this popsicle stand."

Edward throws his head back and laughs. "I'm in love with a nerd."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"You have paint all over your face." Bella laughs.

"You ruined my handy work"—Edward wiggles his fingers—"when you hugged me. I expect a do-over."

She rolls her eyes and bites into an egg roll.

"You know what would be fun?"

"Watching you peel the paint out of your beard in the shower?"

"No. If we did one of those erotic paintings where we cover ourselves in paint and go at it on a blank canvas."

"No."

Edward whines. "No?"

"What would you say to your mom if she asked about the new art hanging above the TV? I don't want my ass print on display."

"We could hang it in the bedroom, for our eyes only."

Bella shakes her head and pushes her plate away. "I'd imagine having sex covered in paint would be as uncomfortable as doing it on a sandy beach. Paint would get in areas that paint has no business being in."

Edward agrees and promises to drop the subject. For now.

After the dishes are done, and they've danced their way through a couple of songs, Edward drags Bella up the stairs for a thorough shower and then back downstairs to watch a movie.

Bella huffs and crosses her arms. "I thought you were supposed to be knocking my pants off. "The Incredibles" is not at all sensual."

Edward shakes his head. "You're no Elastigirl, but you are rather bendy."

Bella reaches for the remote and turns the TV off as she stands. "I'm going upstairs. You've got five minutes before I start without you."

She doesn't make it halfway before Edward tackles her on the steps.

"You caught me." She giggles.

He peels her shirt off and bites the soft skin of her shoulder before whispering in her ear. His voice is rough—a dark chuckle hidden behind lust-filled words. "As if you could outrun me."


	38. The Hunk 38

**38**

**The Hunk**

Rosalie is a month away from her supposed due date when Esme descends.

She arrives with supplies and plans for a grandbaby shower, only to find out that her stubborn mule of a daughter has chosen to forgo that time-honored tradition for many reasons. The debate lasts days as both parties argue back and forth. Esme has decided to play the victim, claiming that she's just excited for her first grandbaby and wants to celebrate accordingly. She almost wins the sympathy vote until Rose finally puts her foot down.

"Who am I going to invite? The only people I knew when I moved here were Emmett's friends and family. I highly doubt Irina's roommates or The Bakery's suppliers would be interested in outlandish diaper cakes and shower games.

"And Bella is just starting to dip her toe back into things. I don't want to overwhelm her with an unnecessary party."

Edward agrees with this wholeheartedly. Just last week, Bella managed to make it through half a shift at The Bakery, and then a successful trip to Walmart after midnight in celebration.

While she hasn't made it back into work, that's only because of Esme's arrival and their bonding time. Edward is still so proud of his girl. Their late-night trips to various twenty-four-hour businesses still continue, and she isn't scared to leave the porch during the day anymore.

Communication is key, and they've done a lot of talking.

"Fine," Esme finally relents. "I guess we can fill out registries for our relatives who live out of town and have a small thing here. Just us."

While Edward and Rose are at work, Bella and their mother organize a perfect little get-together and put the final touches on the nursery to prepare for Kat's arrival.

Rosalie's "baby shower" is co-ed, and Carlisle manages to catch a flight to visit for the day. He spoils his unborn granddaughter with clever doctor grandpa related clothes and toys.

Kat won't be able to play with the children's doctor bag until she's much older, but the sentiment hits home, and there isn't a dry eye as the girls fawn over it.

Carlise's gift is much appreciated a lot more than the shirts and onesies that Edward secretly had commissioned because if Bella knew his plan, she would have put a stop to it.

"You're out of your goddamn mind if you think my kid is going to wear any of this," Rosalie grits out. "Seriously, you totally wasted your money." She throws the small shirt with the word "fucktastic" embroidered across the front at her brother.

"Who's to say what Kat will wear when I'm babysitting and doing my hardest to corrupt her little mind."

Rosalie bursts into tears, and Bella gives Edward an uncharacteristic slap in the back of his head.

"Ouch. What the hell?" he cries.

"Rose is starting to obsess over Kat's health and well being. It's part of the nesting phase. You can't talk like that," Bella explains softly.

Edward apologizes profusely while Irina tries to console her emotional girlfriend, and his parents just shake their heads.

"I'm sorry, Ro. You know I didn't mean anything by it."

Bella and Esme decide to lighten the mood and present a massive cake far too big for their small gathering.

Rosalie seems appeased for the moment.

Edward feels guilty and offers to do the cleanup while Esme drives Carlisle back to the airport.

Irina and Bella work together to build the rocking horse a relative sent. They also insist on installing the car seat bases in everyone's cars, just in case. Because you can never be too prepared when it comes to an impending arrival.

"With our luck, Kat's going to decide to take after her mother and make a grand entrance." Bella laughs. "Let's just hope that she waits a little while longer."

She kisses Edward's lips softly and follows Irina out.

Edward knows that Kat's health is the most important thing and that she needs a little more time. He also knows that Bella is trying very hard to be a part of the delivery. While Rosalie will have Esme, who plans on staying until the baby arrives and for a while afterward to help everyone settle, she has also mentioned her wish that Bella will be in the delivery room.

Bella questioned why Rose didn't want Irina in the room, and his sister replied that she didn't want her girlfriend to witness something so traumatic happening downstairs.

Bella and Edward have been secretly working on getting Bella acquainted with the hustle and bustle of the local hospital, and she's talked it over with Zafrina, who thinks it's possible as long as Kat holds off for a little while longer and that Bella is prepared for a surprise, just in case.

Edward is confident, and Bella thinks that if it came down to it, Rosalie's needs would trump the anxiety. They haven't said anything because they'd hate to get Rosalie's hopes up just in case, for some reason, Bella can't manage it.

"What are you doing, Ed?" Rosalie asks, bringing his attention back to the present. "You've been staring at the wall for ages."

Edward laughs. "Just thinking about how many things are going to change when Kat gets here, that's all." He side-eyes his sister. "What about you? Are you okay?"

Rosalie's eyes well up with tears. "Honestly? No. I'm scared and paranoid."

"Why? You have the greatest support system. Mom, Bella, and me. Don't forget Irina."

Rosalie's bottom lip wobbles. "I love her, and I'm afraid that once the baby gets here, she's going to get overwhelmed and leave."

Edward sighs. He knows first hand what his sister is going through. The doubt and fear are the same things Bella experienced and still does on occasion.

"The only thing you can do is let her prove that she loves you and that she'll love Kat by association. Ro, she knew going in that she was coming into a ready-made family."

Rosalie throws herself at her brother with a sob. "What if she changes her mind like he did?"

Edward softly curses. He knows Emmett still haunts Rosalie's dreams. His ex-brother-in-law hasn't attempted to make any contact since before their divorce was finalized. Their lawyers covered the custody agreement without their presence being necessary. Emmett didn't hesitate to sign his rights over. Rosalie never got closure.

Edward wants to promise that Irina only has good intentions with his sister, but he'd never lie to Rosalie. "If, and it's a big if, that happens, you'll have me and Bella in any capacity you need." He pulls back with a scowl. "Aside from anything romantic. You aren't going to steal my girlfriend."

Speaking of girlfriend. Bella and Irina stumble into the house sporting matching smiles.

Rosalie pulls out of Edward's embrace and turns away in an effort to get control of herself.

"Everything is set. We'll have to visit a fire station to make sure we did it correctly." Her eyes settle on Rosalie's back. "Is everything okay in here?"

"Yeah, baby hormones are surging," Rosalie insists. "Edward was getting all sentimental."

Irina wraps Rosalie up in her arms and whispers softly. "Your mom won't be back for a while. Do you think we can have a little us time before she returns?"

Bella leads Edward out of the house and toward his car. "Let's go for a drive to the hospital, and you can tell me what Irina and I interrupted."

Edward agrees.

The hospital is close by so the drive is quick. He waits to explain everything until they've parked close to the entrance.

Bella gives a sad sigh when he's finished. "I can see why she's worried. Emmett did a number on her. I still have my moments of doubt. You're perfect and have done nothing to make me feel that way. It takes time, and I don't know Irina that well, but she doesn't seem like the kind of person who would waste her time or Rose's."

Edward notices that Bella's eyes never leave the automatic doors as they swing open and shut.

"No matter what, your sister will never question my loyalty and support." She points to the hospital. "I'm going to be ready, and I'm going to be in that delivery room to help her bring Kat into a world full of nothing but love and happiness."

Edward kisses Bella's hand. "And I'll be in the waiting room with the most ridiculous thing I can find in the gift shop."

"You'll have Irina to keep you company," Bella reminds him. "Everything will work out, Honey. Rose deserves something good after all the hell she's been through."

Edward smiles because the old Bella, the one he met so long ago, would never be this optimistic. Edward will happily take some credit for that.


	39. The Hermit 39

**39**

**The Hermit**

Bella waits until she's successfully worked three full shifts at The Bakery before she broaches the subject. "Angela was telling me about this twenty-four-hour diner," she hedges. "It's clear across town and apparently the go-to place for drunk people after a night out."

Edward is running behind schedule, so he doesn't look up from his work of combining the ingredients for a batch of his Colossal Chocolate Chip Cookies that are the special of the day. "Yeah, I remember Rose and Emmett talking about it a couple of times. Famous Amos, right?"

"Yep."

"They said it was kind of a dive."

Bella shuts the oven and approaches him. She pops a couple of chocolate chips in her mouth and hums. "I was thinking I could take you out for once. It's nothing fancy, but it would be a nice change from the usual take-out and dancing in the living room. Not that those nights aren't fun."

Edward pauses. "Sugar, are you asking me out on a date?"

Bella's cheeks warm, and she nods. "Yeah. I mean. We'll have to go at night maybe for a really late dinner or even dessert. The place shouldn't be that busy on a Wednesday night. I think it would be a good time to test the waters."

Edward's eyes become little slits. "But today is Wednesday."

Bella nods again.

"Well, damn, Sugar. This is all very last minute." He grins. "You're giving me no time to prepare."

Bella breaks The Bakery kitchen rules and kisses him softly before pulling away.

Edward bounces from one foot to the other. "For real though. What am I going to wear? How will I do my hair?"

Bella giggles. "I suggest you dress in something simple that will be easy for me to get you out of at the end of our date." She wags her eyebrows.

"Who said I'm going to put out?" Edward argues.

"Psh. Please. I'm going to woo you so hard you'll be begging for it."

"You're on, Sugar."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Just as Bella predicted and secretly hoped the diner is mostly deserted.

They eat greasy burgers and soggy french fries and order dessert.

"This isn't fair." Edward whines.

Bella plays innocent and looks up at him through her lashes. "What?"

He leans across the table. "You. Sucking that straw—" The waitress stops by to check on them, and Edward waits for her to be out of earshot to continue. "—sucking that straw and making me wish it was something else you had your lips wrapped around."

Bella laughs. "I brought you out on a date. You'll be thanking me, not the other way around."

Edward offers her the last bite of his ice cream. "You do realize you sound like a fuck boy, right?"

Bella shrugs and stirs her milkshake. "I win. You're totally going to put out when we get home."

"Sugar, I don't have to be wined and dined in order to make love to you. The benefit of all this is that I got a banana split first."

Bella chuckles and flags down their waitress for the check.

Anxiety has been coursing through her veins and settling at the base of her neck since they left the house, but it's not entirely unbearable. Bella knows that if she doesn't push herself a little more each time, she'll never be able to walk into the hospital and be there for Rose when she goes into labor. She really wants to be able to surprise Rose.

When Edward parks in front of their house, Bella stops him before he can get out of the car. "This is my date, remember?" She makes a big show of opening his door for him and leading him up the walkway. They laugh so hard their sides ache by the time they make it to the front door.

"Let me guess." Edward smirks. "You're going to want a proper kiss goodnight."

"Duh."

With a sigh, Edward gives Bella exactly what she wants, feigning first date jitters and thanking her for a good time before kissing her once on the corner of her mouth. "My parents won't be home until late," he jokes. "Would you like to come inside?"

Bella plays along with her silly boyfriend. "I suppose. I know you would like that too."

He looks confused. "Like what too?"

Bella gives him what she hopes is a seductive look. "Come inside."

Edward laughs. "When did you become so perverted and crude?"

"What can I say? You bring out the best in me."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"So, how are things out in Texas? Have you traded in your pumps for a pair of cowboy boots yet?" Bella asks.

She and Alice have been trying to reconnect, so they're having their first of what will hopefully be many Skype dates.

"_No. I practically live in my flip flops. Jasper has taken his dad's place in the family business despite Maria's protests," _Alice sighs. "_After Peter's accident, she isn't too keen on having him behind the wheel, you know?"_

Bella nods.

"_I'm starting to get stir crazy since Lotz decided to let me go instead of keeping me on remotely. Maria went back to work a few days ago."_

"That sucks. I'd invite you to come out and visit, but I'm so busy with The Bakery and helping Rose prepare for the baby."

Alice smiles.

"_No worries, Bells. Your life is so full now."_

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I don't miss you."

"_I miss you too, and I wish I could come out there, but I understand that you're busy. Besides, I've been applying to a few places in town. I'm not in a hurry, so I get to be picky, but I'd like to find something."_

Bella is catching her sister up on how things have been going on her end when Edward bursts through the front door and calls out for her.

"In the living room."

Edwards still holds a grudge against Alice and Jasper for how everything went down but still manages to give a tight smile and a small wave toward the computer before turning to Bella. "We're just waiting on you, Sugar. I've been sent to warn you that if Kat doesn't get a caramel milkshake soon, we're all going to pay."

Bella laughs and starts to wrap up her conversation with Alice.

"_I'm really glad we could talk today, Bells. I know things are different now, but I'm glad you're letting me back in."_

"You were never out, Ali. I had to work through things in my own way."

Alice has only gotten the Cliff Notes of Bella's struggle because she doesn't see the point in making her sister feel guilty. It's done, and Bella is doing good.

They promise to try to keep in touch as often as possible but know that once the baby gets here, Bella's time will be dedicated to her.

Edward is waiting for Bella by the door and helps her into a light sweater.

"Good talk?"

"Yeah, it was nice to catch up. Things are different now, and our priorities have shifted, so we'll have some growing pains to work through."

Edward's smile is tight.

"I know you're still upset with them but it's over, Honey. I'm moving on. Alice and Jasper are moving on. You should too."

"I'll try, Sugar."

The rest of the night is spent down at Famous Amos with Rose, Irina, and Esme.

Bella will always miss having Alice just a short drive away, but she needs to move on with her life and focus on the here and now—being surrounded by people she loves.


	40. The Hunk 40

**10 chapters to go and I am not ready**

**The Hermit and The Hunk has been nominated for favorite snuggle fic over on the TwiFic Fandom Awards along with some amazing people, groups and contests. I would greatly appreciate the vote  
40**

**The Hunk**

The time has come, and everyone is officially on baby watch.

Rosalie is three days past her supposed due date, and making everyone around her miserable. Esme stays with her while Bella, Irina, and Edward prepare The Bakery staff, both old and new, for the weeks to come. Menus are planned and responsibilities are handed out while everyone learns how to use the point of sale system.

Luckily, Angela has been around long enough to handle stepping in as a temporary manager, seeing as she already knows most of how things go. She's beyond excited to have the opportunity to hold down the fort while the Cullen, Swan, and Devaro clan focus on the newest addition to their family.

If the stubborn little girl ever decides to grace the world with her presence, that is.

When Rosalie calls Edward and begs him to come and rescue her from their insane, overbearing mother, he leaves The Bakery in Bella and Angela's capable hands to finish training and executing one last inventory.

After stopping by Rosalie's favorite deli, Edward comes home and finds his bloated sister lying on his couch with her swollen feet propped up on the coffee table.

"I used my key." She grunts as she tries to sit up. "She's driving me up the wall and acting as if she stares at me long enough, I'll miraculously go into labor."

Edward laughs and hands her the greasy paper bag. "I'm here now, the door is locked, and I brought you a present."

Rosalie peeks inside the bag and inhales deeply. "How did you know?"

"Bella told me that you've been scarfing down Rubens when Mom isn't around." Edward shrugs and heads to the kitchen.

"Have I told you lately that you're my favorite brother?" Rosalie calls.

"I'm your only brother, Ro." He laughs and returns with two glasses of sweet tea and a jar of garlic pickles. "Bella also told me that you love these things about as much as I love peanut butter."

Edward passes her the jar and can't help but smile when he remembers the way Bella dragged him up and down the aisles, piling random things into the cart last night that she thought would be useful to Rosalie. A copy of "The Little Mermaid" soundtrack because that's what Rosalie wants playing while she's in labor, a big exercise ball, and five jars of pickles.

"She's so fucking perfect."

"That she is," Edward agrees.

Rosalie takes a huge bite out of her sandwich. "You better marry that girl."

Edward blushes. "Definitely."

He's only been thinking about putting their grandmother's ring on Bella's dainty finger since the day she told him that she loved him.

Rosalie starts humming the wedding march and popping pickles in her mouth at the same time.

It's disgusting, but Edward's used to it.

"Can I expect to have a sister-in-law anytime soon? I'm sure being the hopeless romantic that you are, you've got big plans to make the proposal ridiculously over the top and sickeningly sweet."

"I have a few ideas, but right now, we need to focus on you and my niece." Edward leans down so that he's eye level with his sister's giant belly. "Anytime, Kit Kat. We're all very excited to meet you, and you can't stay in there forever."

Rosalie grabs his hand and places it just above her belly button.

Edward's smile is a mile wide as his niece starts kicking and punching against his palm.

"I can't wait to meet her," he admits and thrums his fingers, laughing when Kat hits him back.

"You know you're the only one she gets this excited for? She'll hear your voice from clear across the room and start doing somersaults." Rosalie smirks. "She's going to have you so wrapped around her tiny little finger."

"She already does, and she isn't even here yet." Edward doesn't have a lot of experience with babies or young kids, but he's more than willing to learn first hand.

After they finish their lunch, Rosalie suggests that they take a walk around the block.

"You're supposed to be taking it easy."

She sighs. "My OB said it could help bring on labor, and I could definitely use some fresh air. Mom has been lighting lavender-scented candles to help keep a calm atmosphere, and my house smells like a funeral home."

Edward tries to argue, but Rosalie is Rosalie. She eventually gets what she wants, so it's useless.

He nervously helps her put on her shoes and makes sure her hand is wrapped around his arm the entire time. The walk is slow, and it doesn't take Edward long to realize that something is wrong.

When Rosalie stops and grabs her stomach, he begins to panic, but she just waves him off and continues waddling down the sidewalk.

"Motherfucker." She says breathily.

Edward watches her double over and holds her arm for support. "Maybe we should get you home."

Rosalie shakes her head and straightens back up. "It's okay. Just Braxton Hicks. They hurt like a son of a bitch. Let's keep going."

Edward is hesitant, but he knows better than to fight her.

Their stride eventually slows to a mere crawl.

"I wanted to talk to you about something in private before the baby comes." Rosalie grunts and grips his arm. "I had this really cheesy speech all planned out. It was so heartfelt and touching that it was going to make you cry, but I don't think that's going to happen." She looks down, and Edward watches a small puddle pool around her feet.

"Fuck, Ro." He starts scrambling for his phone, but she stops him.

"Just hang on. I want to ask you something really important."

Edward looks at his sister in disbelief. "What could be more important than you going into labor and possibly giving birth on the sidewalk in front of the haunted house?"

Rosalie hisses in pain. "I want to formally ask you to be Kat's godfather."

Edward's eyes water and a lump forms in his throat. "Really?"

"Well, yeah. I'm going to ask Bella to be her godmother. I was hoping to do it beforehand but that's obviously—" Rosalie wails.

"That's it. I'm calling an ambulance."

"No. Just get me home. I need to change and get my bag. Mom's probably going to freak out, so you'll have to call everyone."

Edward half-walks, half-carries a hobbling Rosalie home, stopping when she needs to breathe through a contraction.

When it finally passes, she looks up. "You never answered my question."

"Ro, I would be honored, and I promise to let you have your emotional tear-jearking moment, but right now, we need to focus on you and Kat."

Rosalie nods.

Just as she predicted, Esme flips her lid when they stumble into the house. She pauses only to calmly help her daughter up the stairs to change into fresh clothes while Edward grabs the hospital bag from the nursery and calls Bella.

"It's time," he cheers.

Bella curses softly because she really wanted to be with Rose when it finally happened.

"_Irina and I will meet you at the hospital. Don't tell Rose and don't forget the CD player. Love you." _

She hangs up before he can reply, so Edward calls Rosalie's doctor and then Carlisle, who will be jumping on the first available flight out.

Edward has to practically carry Rosalie out to the car, and Esme sits in the back seat, rubbing her back and talking her through the pain.

"I really wanted to see Bella before we left," Rosalie cries. "But I don't think this stubborn little brat is being very patient right now."

Edward promises her that everything is going to be fine, but it falls on deaf ears when Rosalie gives a piercing scream.

The car comes to a screeching halt at the hospital entrance, and a very excited, albeit nervous, Bella is waiting nearby with a wheelchair.

"Bella!" Rosalie sobs.

"Surprise! Let's go have a baby, okay?"

The admin nurse informs the very excited party that only one person is allowed to go back with the laboring mom to get prepped.

Esme doesn't seem upset when Rosalie chooses Bella.

They take their seats in the waiting room, and Irina eventually returns from parking Edward's car.

"Phew. I guess this is it." She bounces. "My girlfriend is having a baby."

Esme weeps quietly.

"Mom, don't be upset. Bella and Rosalie have grown really close—"

"I'm not upset that Rose wanted Bella. I know this can't be easy, but she's here for Rose. It's such a big deal, and I'm proud of her. Of both of them."

Apparently, Katherine Marie Cullen's patience has worn out because, for someone so hesitant to be born, once things start progressing, they progress fast.

Irina and Edward are only able to visit for about thirty minutes after Rosalie is hooked up to a lot of machines that monitor her and the baby.

Her excitement soon turns to fury when the doctor informs her that it's too late for an epidural, and it's time to start pushing.

Edward hugs his sister as tight as he can and kisses her cheek while his hand rubs Kat from the outside for the last time.

"I love you, Ro. You're gonna rock this."

"You bet your ass I am."

He follows Irina out to the waiting room, and they sit in silence, watching the swinging doors that lead to the labor and delivery ward.

And they wait.

It feels like it's been years, when in reality it's only been an hour and a half, when they hear the birthday song start playing through the intercom, signaling that a baby has been born.

Minutes later, a bright-faced Esme comes crashing through the doors. "She's here. She's perfect. They're just finishing up with Rose, and then we can all go in."

When it's time, Edward holds the doors open and lets the women walk in front of him to be polite.

The room is quiet aside from soft whispers.

Edward has always found Bella to be the most beautiful woman in the world, but nothing could have prepared him for the sight before him. She's breathtaking and smiling so big as she stands next to Rosalie's hospital bed holding a perfect pink bundle in her arms.

Edward only has one thought in his mind.

He's going to marry that girl.


	41. The Hermit 41

**41**

**The Hermit**

"How are you feeling?" Esme asks as the door shuts behind Edward.

Bella turns her focus from the woman in labor to find that the question is directed toward her. "Me? I'm fine," she replies honestly. "I'm excited."

"Well, I'm scared as fuck," Rose grunts and squeezes Bella's hand so tightly her knuckles turn white.

Bella winces in pain but focuses on trying to soothe Rose's nerves. "You're doing great," she assures her. "The nurse said you're progressing so quickly that we're just waiting for the doctor to get here to start pushing."

Tears fall down Rose's cheeks but her smile is blinding. "Before this little gremlin crawls out of me, I'm going to finish the plans I had for the day."

Esme excuses herself and joins the nurses who are preparing the warmer for the baby.

"She already interrupted my moment with my brother, but I'm going to have this." Rose pulls Bella down until their foreheads meet. "Bella, I love you. You're the sister I never had but always wanted, and the world is a better place with you." A contraction tears through her. "Hmmm, I forgot what I was saying. Anyway, this kid is going to need you because lord knows I'm going to screw up from time to time."

"You're going to be an amazing mother, Rose," Bella insists.

"Oh, shut up and stop blowing smoke up my ass." Rose half laughs, half cries. "I'm trying to make a point here. Kat is going to need someone to look up to, and I want it to be you, Bella. Will you be her godmother?"

A sob falls from Bella's lips. "She'll never want for anything, Rose. Of course, I'd love nothing more."

The doctor arrives just as Rose is breathing through another painful contraction.

The table is pulled down and everyone takes their places.

Tears fall unattended as Rose gives it her all, and Bella and Esme encourage her every step of the way.

There are screams and curse words spewed as Kat begins to crown. "Oh, my shit, she's splitting me in half."

Esme reassures her that the feeling is normal and urges her to keep going.

Bella can't speak as she watches the blood and mucus-covered blonde head emerge.

The doctor adjusts things and helps Kat's shoulders come through. He asks Rose for one last push, and all of a sudden, in just a millisecond, the population of the world goes up by one person.

One beautiful, perfect, wailing person.

Rose's arms give out as the doctor places Kat's squirming body on her belly.

"Hi!" Rose sobs. "Oh, my god, I have a kid now."

Everyone laughs while Kat shows off an impressive set of lungs.

Nurses work quickly, scrubbing her clean and keeping her warm as the doctor finishes with Rose.

A nurse holds out a set of surgical shears.

"Who is doing the honors, Mama?"

"Her godmother," Rose whispers, her full attention on her new baby girl.

Bella cries as she cuts the cord separating mother and child.

While the doctor checks Kat over and the nurses get her bundled up, Esme and Bella wipe Rose's sweaty face and praise her for doing such a phenomenal job.

"Can you go get Ed and Irina, please?" Rose asks. "I want them to come and meet my daughter. Because I have a daughter!"

Esme practically floats out of the room.

When the nurse offers Rose the little burrito baby, she shakes her head and points to Bella.

"I just pushed that thing out of me, and I'm a little bitter. Give her to her godmother."

The poor nurse isn't used to Rose's form of humor. Confused, she shows Bella how to properly hold the baby, supporting her head and bottom before she leaves the room with the promise that she'll be just a call button away.

Bella sits down next to Rose.

"I made an entire human." Rose laughs and wipes at her leaking eyes.

Bella can't take her eyes off Kat. "I've never felt this way before." she breathes, taking in the baby-fine eyelashes that surround deep blue newborn eyes.

"You're telling me, my vagina is on fire."

Bella snorts. "I'm talking about the way my heart is aching. The way I'd stand and take a bullet for a person I just met."

"It's called love at first sight, Bells," Rose whispers and caresses Kat's cheek with one trembling finger. "No offense, I thought it was love at first sight when we met, but this is totally different."

"Totally different." Bella agrees.

Something startles Kat, and instinctively, Bella stands to bounce her softly.

She's humming softly when Esme returns with Irina and Edward in tow.

Edward gravitates toward her with the strangest smile on his face.

"She's perfect. Look." She pulls the blanket down. "So beautiful."

Edward wraps his arms around both of them. "You are so beautiful. I can't wait until this is ours."

Bella grins. "Technically, she is. Well, half at least. Rose asked me to be Kat's godmother."

Edward chuckles and gently steals the baby from her arms. "Wrong, Ro asked me to be godfather before she went into labor."

The rest of the evening is spent passing Kat around and sneaking Rose candy from the vending machine. At some point, Irina has to leave to study for an exam she wasn't able to get postponed.

When visiting time is over, Bella is still on cloud nine after the nurses make their rounds to kick out stragglers, so Edward takes her to their diner.

It's still early and busier than usual but all of the excitement of the day has Bella on a high like no other.

Edward sits across from her with a goofy grin.

"Your sister is amazing. She did phenomenally, even the doctor and nurses said so."

"I wouldn't expect anything different from Rosalie."

Bella sighs and scrolls through the hundreds of photos she's taken today. "Kat is such a beauty," she mentions. "I always secretly hoped she wouldn't look like Emmett, and we got lucky. She is all Rose."

Edward chuckles. "Attitude and all. We're all going to have our hands full with that little girl."

"I can't wait to test your theory."

"Me too."

They share a banana split and talk about the little girl who's already stolen their hearts.

Bella and Edward are in the middle of their nighttime routine when she stops and turns to Edward.

"Huh. Something just hit me."

Edward rinses his mouth. "What?

"There's a whole new Cullen now. Isn't that amazing?"

"You're amazing," Edward says and pulls her into his arms. "I think the world deserves something else, something equally amazing."

"What could be just as amazing as the birth of a baby?"

"Gaining one more Cullen, of course." Edward kisses her confused smile. "Marry me, Bella."

Bella gasps.


	42. The Hunk 42

**42**

**The Hunk**

"No."

Edward's rapidly beating heart falls into his stomach. "No? Bella, marry me?" he repeats softly.

She pulls out of his embrace, and he wants to throw up. Her words are firm. "No."

Edward follows her into the bedroom and watches Bella climb into bed.

This wasn't planned.

When Edward thought about proposing, he pictured roses and candles and a romantic speech. Bella deserves nothing but the best, and he doesn't even have his grandmother's ring. But the timing feels right. Well, it did.

"Sugar ..."

"Just go to sleep, Honey," she stresses. "Rose is expecting us early."

Confused, Edward lies down next to Bella and sighs when she turns her back on him.

He doesn't know how long he stays there, trying to figure out why Bella would say no. She knows that he plans on spending the rest of his life with her. They are the endgame. This just seems like the logical next step in their forever.

"Are you awake?"

Edward jumps in surprise. "Yeah."

"It wasn't easy for me to say no to you. I hope you understand that."

"Then why did you?"

The bed shifts as Bella turns over to face him. "You're just caught up in all the excitement of the day, Honey. We all are. Kat's finally here, and that's a big deal."

"Sugar, I've been wanting to marry you for ages. I'm not sorry that I asked, but I am sorry this wasn't the proposal you deserve." Edward swallows the lump in his throat. "But I can understand if you aren't ready."

Bella's hand fumbles in the dark, stopping to caress his cheek. "It isn't about me being ready or not. Let's go to sleep, and when you wake up, you'll realize that you were just caught up. I won't hold it against you."

"But ..."

"Please."

Edward waits until he's sure that Bella is asleep before sliding out of bed. He creeps down the stairs and hides in the pantry just to be safe.

"_Edward? Is everything okay? I'm trying my best to get there, but my flight was canceled, and I'm on standby. Why are you calling so late?" _

"No, Dad. Everything is fine. I'm sorry if I scared you." Edward sighs. "I hate to ask, but is there any way you can run back home and get something for me?"

"_Grandma Platt's ring is already in my carry on."_

"How did you know I proposed?"

Carlisle chuckles. "_I didn't. I was bringing it because I knew you would need it eventually, but I guess you jumped the gun."_

"Yeah, it just sort of happened. She said no." Edward pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"_I'm confused now. If she said no, why would you need the ring?"_

"I need the ring to prove to her that it wasn't a rash decision."

"_All right, what can I do to help?"_

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Edward watches the minutes pass by. His fingers thrum nervously against his thighs as he waits until five minutes before the alarm is set to go off. When the time comes, he stands from the chair in the corner of the room and steps through the maze of vases with floating tealight candles to the bed. One of the flames has gone out, but it's too far away, by the bedroom door, for him to relight it and get back before Bella wakes up.

Luckily, Carlisle was able to catch a flight and drop off the ring while Edward got everything else ready. The dozens of tealights and carefully placed vases were easy. It's what comes next that will be the hard part.

The alarm goes off and Bella bolts upright.

"Honey, wake up. It's time— What?" Her eyes widen as she takes in the scene before her. "What is all this?"

Edward kneels before her on one trembling knee. "This is my do-over. This is the proposal that you deserve."

Bella's eyes brim with tears, but she remains silent.

"Isabella Marie Swan, I knew from the moment I met you that you were something special. You've had my heart from day one, and I was so lucky that you chose to give me the time of day. I'm even more lucky that you've entrusted me with your heart."

Edward clears his throat and holds the aged ring box out. His hand shakes, but he's never been more sure about anything in his life. "You are without a doubt my soulmate. I want you forever. Would you do me the extreme honor of becoming my wife?" He opens the box, revealing a simple gold band with a small diamond.

Bella chokes on a sob and nods her head.

"No, you have to say it out loud."

"Yes, I'll marry you. A million times yes."

Before Edward has time to slip the ring on her finger, Bella throws herself at him and sobs against his lips. "I love you. Of course, I'll marry you."

He kisses her hard on the mouth and pulls away to place the ring on her finger. "This is the ring my grandfather proposed to my grandmother with. I know it's small. If you want something different, something better, we'll go out and get you another."

Bella holds her hand out and watches the tiny stone catch the light from the flickering candle flames. "It's perfect. I'm sure there's an amazing story behind it."

Edward nods. "My grandparents grew up in a mining town in Arkansas. Grandma was a midwife's apprentice, and Grandpa worked in the mines. They wanted to get married, but my grandfather refused to propose without a proper ring. One night when he got off work, he found this tiny speck of a diamond stuck in the bottom of his work boot. He knew that it was enough.

"He jumped a train and traveled halfway across the state to have the stone set because he was afraid any nearby jeweler would report back to the mines and have him arrested for theft."

Edward sighs and runs his thumb over the ring, bringing it to his lips. "When Grandpa returned, ring in hand and ready, he found out that while he was away my great-grandfather had set up an arranged marriage for my grandmother. He was heartbroken."

"Oh," Bella whispers softly.

"The night before the wedding, my grandma snuck out to see him. They ran off to be together and settled in Arizona where they immediately got married. Grandpa went back to school and became a successful lawyer while Grandma was a homemaker. She refused to let him replace the ring because it was a reminder of how far they'd come in life."

"That is beautiful," Bella says. "I love it, and I love you."

"I couldn't imagine it on anyone but you, Sugar."

Edward fully intends on taking his fiancée back to bed to worship her, but the ringing of her cell phone breaks the spell.

"Ignore it," Bella pants as she pushes his boxers to the floor and takes him in her hands.

As soon as her phone stops ringing his starts. Edward groans. "We better get to the hospital before Rose calls the police to come do a welfare check," he says.

Bella giggles. "We'll get back to this as soon as visiting hours are over, Honey."


	43. The Hermit 43

**43**

**The Hermit**

Zafrina has assured her that it's perfectly normal for a couple to butt heads from time to time.

Bella and Edward have had their fair share of arguments. Some silly squabbles and others heated disagreements. They have a rule to never go to bed angry and try to communicate when things get tense.

Imagine Bella's surprise when their first feud as an engaged couple transpires in the parking garage of the hospital a mere hour after they've made it official.

"Everyone's focus should be on Rose and the baby right now," she grits out and continues to pull on her finger. "Shit, it's stuck."

Edward covers her hand with his. "Will you stop trying to take your ring off?"

"This is all your fault, you know?"

Edward snorts. "And how is that?"

"You proposed to me on the same day your sister gave birth to the first baby in the family." She glares. "I mean, who does that?"

Edward pushes her ring back into place and kisses it. "Someone who is madly in love with his other half and wanted to lock it down." He smirks. "And technically, I proposed the morning after."

Bella sighs. "Honey, I just don't think this is a good idea. How is Rose going to feel when you steal her thunder? She and Kat haven't even been released yet."

"Knowing my sister, she'll be happy to have the spotlight off of her for a while. She hates attention." Edward gathers their stuff. "She's going to be pissed if her breakfast is cold. Let's go."

As the elevator takes them up to the postpartum floor, Bella's palms sweat with anxiety. The familiar trickle of panic begins its slow crawl up her backbone. While Edward's family has been nothing but warm, and accepting marriage is an entirely different ballpark. What if they don't approve?

"Sugar, stop worrying. We've done nothing wrong."

Bella gives an unconvincing laugh.

"I'm serious. Why don't we hold off on announcing anything just yet?" he offers. "We won't say anything, but if they notice, they notice."

She nods and follows him into Rose's room.

"Fucking finally," Rose greets, ignoring her mother's hiss of disapproval. "What took you guys so long? I was ready to go all cannibal coyote and eat my kid."

Edward drops the bag of bagels on her lap, making her wince and punch him in the stomach.

"Dude, sore vagina!"

He grimaces and rubs the sore spot her fist left. "Sorry," he wheezes.

Carlisle hogs the baby, but that's to be expected, seeing as his time is limited.

"Jesus, Ro. The food isn't going to run away if you take a second to breathe between bites."

All the women in the room glare.

"Come talk to me when you've had a tiny leech of a monster sucking the soul out of your left tit on and off for the past twelve hours," she growls and stuffs half a bagel in her mouth.

Edward has the sense to look ashamed.

"That's what I thought, fuck face."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Bella manages to keep her left hand discreetly hidden until it's her turn to hold the baby.

Edward offered to take Carlisle to the airport so it's just the girls.

Kat, who just ate, starts rooting around and sucking on her blanket, so Bella reaches up to pull the fabric away from her mouth.

Esme gasps, and Rose gives a very un-Rose-like squeal.

"No. Fucking. Way!"

"Rosalie, someone could hear you."

"Sorry, Mom. I didn't think Edward was going to propose when we talked about it yesterday. He said he was working on a plan." She grabs Bella's hand. "This ring is so you. I take it Ed told you the story behind it?"

Bella nods but doesn't take her eyes off Esme, who hasn't taken her eyes off of the ring. "Yeah, he told me. He offered to get me something different ... Esme, if you aren't okay with Edward giving me your mother's ring, I completely understand."

"Oh, you silly girl. Why do you think I told Carlisle to bring it with him when he came?" She snorts. "Although, I didn't expect my son to ask you the second he got this hands on it."

Rose laughs. "Please. Ed is completely stupid in love when it comes to Bella."

"Actually, he proposed last night without the ring. I said no because I thought he was just excited."

Rose sighs. "You have got to quit doubting yourself, woman. My brother wouldn't do anything as serious as proposing if he wasn't one hundred and ten percent all in. Wait, you said no?"

Esme takes Kat and places her in the bassinet before joining Bella at the foot of the bed. "I have a feeling he made up for being unprepared?"

Bella nods. "He filled the bedroom with vases and floating candles and waited for me to wake up. He spoke straight from the heart, and I couldn't imagine a more perfect proposal."

She smiles sadly. "I wouldn't say that James proposed. He just casually mentioned that we should get married, and foolishly, I agreed." Bella twists her ring around her finger. "Edward has shown me what true love and real romance are."

"I, for one, can't wait for you to be a Cullen." Esme grins. "I already consider you a part of the family."

"Here, here," Rose cries. "You've been my sister since day one, but now, it'll be more official."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Edward pounces the second they get home, barely giving Bella a chance to take off her shoes.

"What are you doing, Honey?" She laughs as he pulls her to the couch.

"I've been itching to get my fiancée alone all day, and now, I've finally got her. C'mere."

Bella steps out of her pants and straddles his lap. "So, you've got me. What are you going to do?"

Edward chuckles darkly and peels her shirt off, tossing it over the back of the couch and taking both breasts into his big hands, making her moan in delight. His mouth sucks at the skin of her neck. "Wouldn't you like to know, Sugar?"

"I have a feeling I'm about to find out."

He trails kisses from the dark mark to her mouth. "You are correct." His mouth takes complete control as clothes are shed.

All of a sudden, Bella has a lump in her throat, and she's blinking back tears.

Edward looks up when he realizes she isn't participating. "What's wrong, Sugar?"

Bella tries to swallow her emotions. "Nothing."

She tries to pull him back to her, to resume what he started, but Edward won't hear of it.

"Talk to me, baby. Please."

Bella sits back and wipes her cheeks. "I keep thinking that I'm going to wake up tomorrow and this will all have been just a dream," she croaks. "A wonderful, really beautiful dream."

Edward squeezes her almost too tightly. "I have the same fear, you know."

"You do?"

He nods into her hair. "Of course, I do, Sugar. You are all of my dreams come true. Dreams I didn't even know I had until I met you." He lifts her chin and kisses her nose. "I never knew a love like this could exist, Bella. You say that I've taught you everything, but you don't know how much I've learned just from knowing you."

"I love you. I can't wait to marry you."

Their emotional moment ruins the mood, so Edward proposes a bath before bed. They're soaking in the bubbles when he asks her what kind of wedding she wants.

"Well, we've only been engaged for less than a day, so I haven't had the chance to give it much thought. What about you?"

He sweeps a washcloth up her arm and across her chest. "You agreed to marry me. Everything else is just a bonus."

Bella sighs. How is it possible that he grows more perfect as the days go by? "I've had a shitty engagement and planned a ridiculous wedding before. This is completely different, and going by how I feel, I'd like something simple but more than just a drive to the courthouse."

"Hmm." Edward kisses her neck. "How simple are we talking, Sugar?"

Bella takes a shaky breath. "You, me and our family. No church. No extravagant decorations. No over the top white dresses and tuxedos. Just us in a comfortable atmosphere."

"That sounds perfect." He hums.

"It will be, Honey. Because at the end of the day, you'll be mine, and I'll be yours in every conceivable way."

She lets him turn her head and kiss her mouth softly. "Okay, we've talked about the details. When would you like this to take place?"

"The anniversary of the day we first met would have been perfect."

"But that's already passed. Do you want to wait a whole year to get married?"

"No. Do you have any thoughts or preferences? You need to have an opinion on this."

"What about the day you told me you loved me?"

The bath water sloshes over the sides of the tub as Bella turns and climbs onto his lap. "Yes. That's perfect. Just perfect."

She wraps her arms around his neck and rocks against his erection. "I want you. Now."

Sex in a bubble bath is a bad idea for multiple reasons, so they quickly rinse off in the shower before falling onto the bed, still wet and still wanting.

Bella moans when his talented fingers sweep across her heat and focus on her clit, applying just the right amount of pressure as his mouth dominates hers.

"Fuck, fuck," Bella cries as she falls apart.

"I love you, Sugar," he vows and enters her in one quick thrust. "I'm always going to love you."

Bella pulls at the hair on the nape of his neck. "Prove it to me," she gasps. "Show me."


	44. The Hunk 44

**44**

**The Hunk**

Two weeks old and Katherine Marie Cullen already has everyone wrapped around her dainty pinky finger. The entire family is at her beck and call, and sleep? The newborn babe doesn't understand the concept.

Stress affects everyone differently, and Edward can tell that Bella is trying to keep a brave front around everyone, but she's struggling behind closed doors and not sleeping when she has the chance.

He's proud of her when she admits that she needs to see Zafrina and asks him to make the call.

Knowing that Bella is next door in the very capable hands of her doctor is both comforting and worrisome at the same time. Edward knows that he's partly to blame for the added stress.

While Bella insists that everything is fine, she hasn't called her sister to tell her about the engagement yet. So far, she's been using Kat and Rosalie as an excuse.

"Yo, Ed. Pass me a diaper," Rosalie says, snapping her fingers to get his attention.

"Sorry." He turns to the door. "I'm always on edge when she has a session with Zafrina."

Rosalie plops his beautiful niece in his arms. "Here, have a distraction."

Edward runs a finger down Kat's baby soft cheek, and she yawns. "Best distraction ever." he murmurs.

Kat coos.

"Say it with me, Kit-Kat. Fuck-tas-tic." He kisses her forehead and deflects Rosalie's swinging arm.

"You suck donkey, D.I.C.K."

Edward snorts.

When they were released from the hospital, Esme asked for one thing—for everyone to try to watch their mouths around the baby, at least until she heads back home.

Edward's eyes flicker back to the door, willing it to open and reveal a smiling Bella.

"She's fine, Ed," Rosalie insists. "It's a pretty big step, admitting that she felt off and asking for Zafrina."

"I know, but it doesn't stop my imagination from going haywire. You remember the outcome of her homework to drive around the block. I can't go through that again."

"You won't. You're underestimating Bella's strength."

Edward stands up and bounces his niece until her eyes flutter open and shut. "You made a pretty baby, you know?"

"Trust me, it's all vanity. I think she's evil on the inside. She's trying to kill me via sleep deprivation. I'm so tired I can't see straight."

Edward points to the stairs. "Go take a nap with Mom, and I'll keep Kat company."

Rosalie bites her lip. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I can't leave her alone with anyone. Not even Mom."

"No offense taken. Why don't you just lie on the couch and rest your eyes? If you fall asleep, I'll wake you up to be milked," he jokes.

Rosalie flips him off but does take him up on his offer.

She's out before her head hits the pillow, so Edward covers her with a throw.

Kat is also asleep, but he knows better than to put her down. If he stops moving, she'll wake up screaming, so Edward paces the lower half of the house as quietly as possible, stopping to check the window with each pass to make sure Zafrina's car is still out front.

He's coming out of the kitchen for the twentieth time when the front door opens, and Bella steps inside, followed closely by her doctor.

"You were right, Bella. The pictures don't do her justice," Zafrina whispers

Bella smiles and gently lifts Kat's relaxed body out of Edward's arms. "Zafrina wants to talk to you before she goes," she says without looking up.

Edward watches her disappear around the corner and closes his eyes, preparing for the worst but hoping for the best. "How bad is it?"

"Not bad at all. Bella is just struggling with a bit of self-doubt. She's in a good place right now."

"Why do I feel a 'but' coming?"

"Now that all the excitement is over, a setback is possible. It could be a big one or a small one, so you should keep an extra keen eye on her." Zafrina looks toward the kitchen. "Try to watch for stress or fatigue and mention that she should take a break but don't push it. She should be able to choose for herself."

Edward nods. "Watch but don't hover. Ask but don't tell. Got it."

"Exactly. I've got to go, but I trust you to take care of her. If she needs anything, feel free to use my personal number." Zafrina stops at the threshold. "And congratulations on the engagement, Edward."

"Thanks."

Bella comes out of the kitchen with a glass of iced tea in one hand, the baby in the other, and an honest smile.

"You look lighter," Edward mentions.

"I feel lighter. Sometimes talking to someone on the outside is just what I need."

Kat decides that she isn't getting enough attention and gives a shrill cry that has Rosalie on her feet and reaching for her.

"She's fine, Rose," Bella insists but passes her the baby.

"I know. I'm sorry. It's instinct." She sits down and covers herself to nurse. "How was your visit with the good doctor?"

"Good. I'm feeling a little sensitive right now, and this beautiful little girl isn't helping matters with her crazy schedule."

Rosalie starts to apologize, but Bella won't hear of it. "It's fine. This is new to all of us. Bumps and bruises are to be expected. I am going to steal Edward away for a little alone time though. We'll wait for Esme to wake up."

"No, go now. We're expecting Irina any time now, and I'm sure I can handle it on my own for five minutes."

"You're sure?" Edward asks.

"Just go."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Bella yawns and stretches like a milk-drunk kitten. "That was just what I needed." she breathes.

Edward wipes his face on her thigh and climbs back up to kiss her square on the mouth. "I'm more than happy to help." he chuckles.

"Hmm," Bella yawns again. "I'm sorry. I want to continue, but I'm exhausted."

"No worries, Sugar. I'm glad you're admitting that you're tired instead of bottling it up and powering through it."

"Zafrina and I talked about some things, and I think we need to start taking small steps back. We'll always be here for Rose, but Kat isn't our baby, you know?"

"I agree. Mom will eventually go home, and we have to get back to The Bakery at some point. Rosalie will be okay on her own, and if she isn't, we'll be just a phone call away."

Bella stifles another yawn against his neck and snuggles closer. "Maybe we can take tomorrow off and try to go back to work on Wednesday. Test the waters and see how things go."

"Sounds like a good idea to me. We'll tell Mom and Rosalie tonight, and tomorrow, you'll be all mine."

"I promise I'll make up for passing out on you and leaving you high and dry," she slurs.

Just as they planned, Edward and Bella spend the entire day holed away in their house, making up for the lost time.

Rosalie is understanding and more than ready to try it somewhat on her own.

Edward makes sure to keep one eye on Bella at all times, watching for any sign of struggle, but if she is, it doesn't show.

She spends most of the day wearing him out so that they'll both get a good night's rest before they return to work.

The first day back is exciting and has its ups and downs.

Bella decides that her project of the day should announce the arrival of the newest member of The Bakery's family. Rosalie would throw a fit if she saw all the pink "It's a girl" cookies.

Halfway through the day, for some unknown reason, Bella gets overwhelmed, and Esme has to come pick her up and take her home.

Edward works the rest of the day instead of calling an overworked Angela in so that Bella can have some space. He checks in on her once the store is closed.

_**I'm feeling a little sluggish. Can you grab something for dinner on your way home?**_

_Of course, Sugar. Hummus and falafel for everyone!_

_**Bring that home and you're sleeping on the couch, Honey.**_

Edward stops and picks up enough Chinese food to feed a small army. He drops off half next door and finds a freshly showered Bella waiting for him on the couch.

"Hey, Sugar."

"Hi, Honey."

They get settled at the coffee table, and she's quiet for a beat.

"I'm sorry about today. I don't know what happened." She shakes her head. "One minute, I was fine, and the next, it was all doom and gloom."

"It's fine, Bella. We've had a lot going on, and you're doing so great. How are you feeling now?"

She gives him a lazy smile. "I came home, took a pill, and a long nap. Everything is right as rain."

"Good."

Edward can only hope that things stay this way.


	45. The Hermit 45

**45**

**The Hermit**

Bella has always needed to have some sense of control in her life, and time has only exacerbated the necessity. After meeting Edward and inviting him into her life, into her heart, she's managed to let go of that need, little by little. She's learned that change is inevitable and that sometimes it's for the better.

After Kat was born, things got complicated as everyone's routines were interrupted to make room for the baby.

Bella found herself overwhelmed by the sudden spiral of the unknown. She wasn't ashamed to ask for help instead of letting things get bad. Zafrina and Edward were nothing but supportive in her decision to take back the control that had accidentally slipped away with all the excitement. She foolishly thought that returning to work would be the magical cure for the dark thoughts that had begun creeping in, but she was wrong. But that's okay. Depression and anxiety don't exactly come with an instruction manual.

Bella's first day back at The Bakery wasn't as perfect as she'd hoped it would be. Everything was fine for the first half when all of a sudden, dread and paranoia had her doubled over hyperventilating in the pantry until Esme came and took her home.

She couldn't help but worry. Was Rose upset with her because she couldn't be the constant rock she'd promised to be when the baby came? Was Esme disappointed in her for the same reason? How angry will her sister be when she finally has the courage to share the news about Edward proposing? Alice and Jasper postponed their wedding indefinitely in hopes that Bella would eventually get her shit together, and now Bella and Edward are planning one of their own. Will Alice resent her? Or worse, hate her?

Slowly but surely things have gotten better. When Irina's lease was up, she and Rose made the mature decision to move in together. Three's a crowd, so once Esme was sure that everyone would be okay without her, she headed home. Kat is growing like a weed, an amazing, beautiful, and mesmerizing weed.

And Edward ... Edward is perfect.

Today, he's perfectly annoying but in a charming way. "Hey, Sugar?" he calls across the kitchen.

Bella looks up from her mixer and fights the urge to roll her eyes. He's been at this all morning.

"You get more beautiful every time I look at you."

Bella can't help but snort because, at the moment, she feels anything but. The air conditioning went out at some point last night, and the kitchen is boiling. The industrial fans they rented while the technician fixes the unit aren't doing anything but circulating the hot air wafting from the ovens.

"You don't believe me." Edward pouts.

Bella gives in to the impulse and rolls her eyes. "Honey, I'm practically melting over here."

He drops a tray in the sink and saunters over.

His hair is slicked back and Bella's eyes hone in on the sweat beading on his top lip. She wants to lick that lip. But there are kitchen rules for a reason.

"Seriously." He wraps his arm around her waist and pulls her close. "What can I do to make you believe me, hmm?"

It's hot and sharing body heat isn't helping.

"You've got the whole Rosie the Riveter thing going on with your hair up like that. It's very sexy. It does things to me. Wonderful things."

His chest vibrates with a low growl, making Bella pant and lean in. They're about to break the kitchen rules they set when the door swings open and Irina's head pops in.

"Ed, the A.C. guy— WOW. Sorry."

Bella pushes Edward away, and his pout returns.

"It's for the best. Health code violations," she reminds him and turns to Irina. "What's up?"

Irina smirks. "Sam is finished, and I wanted to warn you that he needs to come back and flip the breaker so you wouldn't get startled. I'm glad I interrupted, or he would have gotten a show."

"Thanks, Irina."

But Irina has been spending far too much time with Rose. "I mean, talk about impeccable timing, am I right? Two more minutes and who knows what the poor old man would have witnessed."

Edward groans. "Send him back."

"Sure thing, boss." She winks. "You know there's no real rule pertaining to fraternization inside the office. When Rose was still pregnant we—"

"I own the whole bakery, so technically, I can do whatever the fuck I want. I don't need to hear about what you and my sister have done."

Irina huffs. "Fine, but the two of you need to do something. We can all feel the sexual tension permeating through the wall, for Christ's sake."

"Irina ..." Bella warns.

"I'm going, I'm going."

The door swings shut, and Edward reaches for her, but Bella takes a step back and shakes her head.

"Come on. One kiss," he begs.

"You know as well as I do that isn't possible. The heat has gone to your head."

Edward smiles and points to his crotch. "Definitely."

"You're a pervert. I'm going to go stand in the walk-in until the tech is finished." She grabs his chin. "Do not follow me."

While most things have gone back to normal, Bella is still struggling with social anxiety. Just to be safe, she avoids situations when she can. She's standing in the cooler with her chef's jacket unbuttoned and fanning her shirt in an effort to cool down when Edward finds her.

"You are not making this easy on me, Sugar."

"You didn't listen to me," Bella taunts and rights her clothing. "I take it the air conditioning is fixed?"

"Yup. Sam said we should vacate the kitchen while it cools down."

Bella can smell a lie from a mile away. Her eyes narrow. "Oh really?"

"Yeah. He said it's only going to get hotter, so I shut down the ovens we aren't using." Edward grabs her hand. "We should go sit in the car while we wait."

Bella tries to argue, but he's adamant.

They settle in front of the air conditioning vents.

"You should take off your jacket," Edward mentions. "You know, to cool down some."

"Honey."

"C'mon, Sugar. You're out of excuses," he sings.

Bella knows she's fighting a losing battle. She probably wants it as much as he does at this point. She carefully folds her jacket and sets it in the back seat, and then makes Edward do the same.

Someone has to remain professional.

He pushes his seat all the way back and pats his lap.

Bella wastes no time straddling his legs.

"The Bakery closes in two hours, and Irina offered to do clean up." He grins and grips her ass, pulling her down onto his erection. "We've got about ten minutes before one of the timers goes off."

Bella licks the sweat off his top lip and groans. "You're crazy if you think ten minutes is going to be long enough after the morning we've had."

"Exactly. We're already hot and bothered, maybe we can just amplify it until we get home."

Bella rolls her hips, seeking the delicious friction his body promises her. "I might explode if this gets any worse."

Edward grabs her face. "I can promise you that it's going to be explosive, Sugar."

"Honey," Bella whines and pulls him in for an eager kiss.


	46. The Hunk 46

**46**

**The Hunk**

_*****FLASHBACK*****_

When Bella comes down with a terrible head cold, she blames Edward for bringing germs into her home and refuses to let him take care of her.

"Sugar, you're dead on your feet. Let's just order takeout or walk me through how to finish up," he pleads.

Bella coughs into the crook of her arm and shakes her head. "I'm almost finished."

Her voice is thick with congestion, and she's even paler than usual. Edward can tell she's struggling to stay upright but knows by now that she's hard-headed.

Stubborn woman.

"How about you quit staring at me and go fetch my mail? It's been a couple of days since I've checked."

Glad to have something to do besides watching her cook, Edward is quick to do as she asks. The box by her front door isn't cram-packed, but the lid has been left slightly open, leaving the envelopes and circulars stuck together. He carries the stack inside and shows Bella.

"I've left the new courier notes asking them to please shut the lid. Especially when it rains." She huffs. "Hopefully, there isn't anything important in there."

Edward sits at the table and slowly peels the papers apart. "Publisher's Clearing House?"

"Trash."

"Electric bill?"

Bella sneezes. "Excuse me. You can throw that out. I've already paid it online."

"Okay ... you got something from the Department of Motor Vehicles." He raises an eyebrow. "You have any outstanding speeding or parking tickets you forgot to tell me about, Sugar?"

Bella snorts. "I haven't driven in two years, and before that, I was a very responsible driver, thank you very much." She turns back to the stove with a shrug. "It's probably just a notice that my license has expired. Set it aside."

Edward peeks inside the envelope. "Sugar?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me that your birthday was last week?"

"Where did you think those little petit fours came from? Alice sent them."

Edward frowns. "I don't know. Why didn't you say anything? We could have celebrated it or something." He looks back at the paper. "You cooked on your birthday."

Bella doesn't turn around. "I don't celebrate my birthday, Honey."

"But—"

"It's not a big deal," she says with finality.

_***** END FLASHBACK*****_

"Do you think the diner will have any lemon pie tonight?" Bella ponders. "I'd really like a slice."

Edward hums in agreement.

Famous Amos has this lemon pie that is a citrus, flaky piece of heaven. Unfortunately for Bella, she won't be finding out if they're serving it tonight.

Right on cue, Edward's phone rings. He presses the Bluetooth button on the steering wheel. "What's up, Ro?"

"_The alarm company just called. There's a disturbance down at The Bakery. I'd go, but I just got Kat to sleep."_

Edward gives a dramatic sigh. "We'll stop by and check it out before we go on our date. I'll call you." He hangs up the phone. "Sorry, Sugar. The lemon pie will have to wait a little while."

Bella laughs. "I suppose I'll survive on this piece of gum until then."

When they pull up, the building is dark, and Bella grows suspicious. "It doesn't look like anyone is in there. The lights are off."

"That doesn't mean someone isn't in there trying to steal your beloved double oven," he teases and opens his door. "Let's go make sure everything is safe so we can go on our date."

Bella stops him before he can get out. "What are you going to do if they're still there? Ask them to politely leave? We should wait for the police." She looks around. "Wait, shouldn't there be cops? What kind of security system do you have?"

Edward chuckles. "The very best. An officer probably did a drive-by when the company called Rosalie. We're just going in to check everything. It'll be fine. Come on, chicken."

"Honey, it's not safe," she whispers.

Edward can see a cloud of anxiety form above Bella's head. Shit. He didn't consider that this scenario would freak her out. It's too late now.

"Sugar, it's fine. Trust me."

It takes a few minutes and more than a few pleas on his part to get her to open her door. She's still apprehensive but has her phone on and nine-one-one at the ready just in case.

Bella clutches the back of Edward's shirt as he unlocks the door and leads the way inside. They find the kitchen untouched.

"Okay, we're good. Let's go," Bella begs.

"We have to check the storefront."

He waits until they're both standing in the doorway to flip the lights on.

"SURPRISE!"

Bella jumps a foot in the air and promptly bursts into tears at the sight in front of her.

Edward has been planning a surprise birthday party for weeks now. When he called Alice to see if she and Jasper would be able to make it out, he was warned. "_Bella hates anyone making a fuss, Edward. And she hates her birthday even more."_

His goal is to change her mind.

"Oh my"—Bella swats his arm—"I told you I didn't want to do anything."

"I know, Sugar. But your birth is something to be celebrated." He presses his lips to her forehead. "Your sister is chomping at the bit to come over here, so dry your tears and greet your party guests."

Edward watches Bella embrace her sister and smiles when Alice pulls back to inspect her engagement ring.

Silly Bella had herself so worked up about telling her sister, but Alice was nothing but supportive.

"_I knew it! Seriously, I was just telling Jasper."_

Rosalie and Angela wave him over to the treat table, and he gets a look at the birthday cake Angela prepared.

"Lemon?"

"Duh." She smiles widely. "Lemon cake, lemon custard filling, with a white chocolate ganache frosting. Simple and beautiful just like the birthday girl."

Edward nods and watches while his once recluse, antisocial girlfriend flourishes among their small group.

Esme and Carlisle fawn. Even Ben gets a handshake.

Alice refuses to leave Bella's side until she manages to steal Kat from Irina.

Then and only then does Bella find her way back to him with a breathtaking, albeit watery smile.

"How are you liking your party, Sugar?"

"It's perfect. Just perfect. You always know exactly what I need even when I don't." She sighs. "Thank you so much, Honey."

Edward pulls her into his arms. "I told you that you only deserve good memories, Bella. It's my life's mission to make you happy and keep you that way."

"I love you." She sighs dreamily.

The night is spent surrounded by family and friends who have become family. They eat way too much food and laugh way too hard.

When they finally get home, Bella falls into bed with a yawn.

"I don't think I could feel more loved than I do right now."

Edward chuckles darkly and pulls at the cuffs of her jeans. "Let's see about that."


	47. The Hermit 47

**47**

**The Hermit**

"I have loads of sugar cookie dough leftover from yesterday." Edward scowls playfully. "All your fault, by the way."

Bella scoffs. "My fault? How is it my fault that you screwed up your math and doubled the recipe?"

"Those pants you were wearing were practically painted on, and you left your panties at home." He squeezes her ass, hard. "And I didn't double the batch. I tripled it."

Bella giggles. "You're silly."

"And your ass is phenomenal." He kisses her sweetly before pulling away. "Please help me come up with an idea for today's special."

Bella taps her chin in thought. "Snickerdoodles?"

"No."

"What about your Colossal Chocolate Chip Cookies?"

"I made those last week."

Bella huffs. "What if you just slapped a bunch of food coloring on it and made rainbow pinwheel sugar cookies?"

Edward nods. "That would be fun, considering how rainy it's been lately. I knew I kept you around for a reason." He gives her his best puppy dog eyes. "Do you want to help me?"

She rolls her eyes. "You can put your pout away. Lucky for you, I don't have a cookie order today, so I can help you out."

Bella is elbow deep in food coloring and cookie dough when Angela pops her head in.

"Hey, Bells. There's a lady on the phone asking for a consultation."

"A cookie consultation?"

Angela nods. "I don't recall you ever doing one before, so I wanted to check."

Bella looks at Edward in question.

"You're choice, Sugar."

"Okay. Go ahead and schedule it, Ang."

"'Kay."

She disappears to finish her call, and Bella turns back to her project.

"I'm proud of you, Sugar," Edward says softly, breaking the comfortable silence.

"I know. This shade of blue is perfect, right?"

He chuckles. "I'm talking about taking a consultation. It's a step I'm sure Zafrina will be happy to hear about."

Bella shrugs. "I was starting to get worried that I'd hit a plateau in my progress. I've been venturing out front and socializing with a few of the regulars, so I think it will be fun. Bouncing ideas off a customer one on one."

Edward clears his throat and corrects her. "Client."

"Client," Bella agrees. "I'm still adjusting to the idea that people find my hobby so serious."

"You're talented, Sugar. And I'm not just saying that. I haven't met one person who doesn't like what you do."

The door swings open, and Angela stomps into the kitchen with a scowl on her face and a piece of paper in hand. "Tomorrow might be the first and last cookie consultation The Bakery will ever see." She slams the paper down on the counter. "That pompous ass wants her meeting at noon sharp."

Bella picks up the note. "And that makes her pompous because?"

Angela huffs. "She wants visuals of all your past work and for you to come up with ideas for garden party-themed cookies."

Bella breathes. "No pressure, huh?"

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Date night has been postponed so Bella can prepare for her meeting. Luckily, she's a shutterbug and has plenty of pictures of the cookies she's done. While Edward runs to pick up dinner, Bella organizes all the projects into a makeshift portfolio before hitting up Pinterest and google for ideas to show the client. Garden parties can vary from actual plants and sod to wealthy women needing an excuse to drink and gossip during the day. Her mother hosted more than a few of the latter, and judging by Angela's reaction, Bella is certain she won't be decorating flower pots and daisies for the job.

"Sugar, I'm home!"

Bella laughs and pushes her laptop to the side. "Good, I'm starving."

While Bella scarfs down an entire hoagie and half a bag of chips, Edward flips through the binder. "Gosh, I didn't realize how many jobs you've done already." He chuckles and points to a picture. "You're showcasing my serial killer caricature cookie?"

"Of course I am. That's one of my favorite pieces."

Edward adds plenty of input and helps her come up with ideas to present to the client. "You make really beautiful sunflowers. You should have an entire section for those."

"Flattery will get you everywhere, sir." Bella laughs and stands up. "Come take a shower with me, and you might get lucky."

Edward is quick to follow. "What kind of odds are we talking about, Sugar? Seventy-five percent?"

Bella pulls him into the bathroom and makes quick work of his belt. "Shampoo my hair for me, and I'll let you do whatever you want for one hour. Deal?"

"Deal."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

Nerves start to kick in as Bella sets up for her meeting at a table in a secluded corner of The Bakery. Her palms sweat and stick to the papers as she tries to fan them out.

"You're going to do great, Bells," Rose insists and passes her a cranky Kat. "Why don't you work your voodoo on her while I finish getting everything ready?"

Never one to decline a snuggle, Bella takes her up on the offer.

Kat cries at Bella in her baby babble and yanks her right ear.

"Her ear infection isn't getting any better?"

"Yeah, it's clearing up. She's just due for a nap and knows that it'll get her more attention. You're the only one who can calm her down when she gets like this, and you don't even have the proper udders."

Bella laughs and hums in Kat's left ear. "Go to sleep, Kitty-Kat. Go to sleep," she murmurs.

As if by magic, Kat's once tense body relaxes, and she molds herself to Bella's chest.

"Seriously, how do you do that?" Rose asks incredulously.

Bella shrugs. "I can't help it if she likes me the most."

Irina calls for Rose and holds up the store phone.

"Shit. That must be the new supplier calling to talk about last week's delivery." She eyes Kat. "Do you think you can hold onto her for a few minutes while I chew these people out for leaving us short?"

Bella checks her phone. "My client shouldn't be here for another ten minutes. Go ahead. I'll pass her off to Angela if I need to."

Knowing better than to sit down before Kat gives a deep sigh, Bella rocks the baby back and forth and paces from the table to the counter, talking softly with Angela when she isn't helping customers.

"I still can't believe you asked me to make your wedding cake," Angela gushes.

"My birthday cake was amazing, so it was really a no-brainer."

Angela slides an iced coffee her way. "I love that you guys are doing everything yourselves. I wish I were talented enough to make my own dress."

"We want everything to be perfect and to mean something." Bella blushes. "Relationships take a lot of work, so we're putting a lot of attention into our wedding. As for the dress, Edward loves the sweater I made when we first met. It was his idea, considering I couldn't find a style I liked in the color I've decided on."

"I'm the daughter of a pastor, and it would have caused a lot of stink in my tiny town if I didn't wear virgin white." Angela rolls her eyes.

Bella buries her face in Kat's sweet-smelling hair. "I've planned a wedding to please everyone else, and we all know how that turned out. This time is different. Our happiness is the only thing that matters."

Angela agrees.

A group of customers walk in, so Bella makes her way back to her table to make sure no one touches the set up. She still has a minute, so she decides to wait until Angela is free instead of interrupting Rose and Irina's call.

Bella is flipping through her binder when the bell above the door rings, and the temperature in the room changes slightly.

A shudder runs its course down her backbone as her eyes meet the cold and distant gaze of Renee Swan.

As soon as the woman sees her, her body stiffens as her gaze homes in on the baby sucking the skin of Bella's shoulder.

The sound of Renee's heels on the tile echoes in Bella's ears as a slow trickle of anxiety starts burning it's way up her legs.

"Isabella."

Bella remains silent. Not because she can't talk. Not because her throat is opening up in panic. No, it's nothing like that.

Bella and Zafrina have talked about this situation before and even more so since Bella started making steady progress. It's inevitable that she'd run into her parents at some point she just never thought it would be today.

Bella's opinion hasn't changed on the matter. Even with her mother looking down her nose at her, judging her by her appearance as per usual, Bella still feels that Renee Swan isn't worth the air that she breathes.

"I'm guessing James decided to give you another chance once you got your trust fund back," she sneers. "Or did you manage to trap some poor man with a baby?"

"It's none of your business, Renee."

Renee scoffs.—"I told Daddy that you were faking your whole dramatic act after James finally realized what a mistake you were. Look at you now" she points in Bella's direction—"still a disappointment. Where's your baby's father? Has he jumped ship like everyone else in your life?"

A year ago, the vitriol this woman is spewing would have probably sent Bella into a tailspin, but she's got a better head on her shoulders now, and she's had enough.

"You don't know what you're talking about. I can tell you one thing." Bella leans forward. "You aren't welcome here, so I suggest you leave. Now."

Kat gives a deep sigh and burrows deeper into Bella's neck.

"And who the hell do you think you are?"

In an instant, Edward is at Bella's side, with a calm hand on her shoulder and a glare for the woman who gave birth to her.

"Considering my fiancée works here, and I own the place, she has every right to tell you to go."

Renee's eyes bulge and her mouth gapes.

Edward lifts Bella's chin with one finger and silently asks if she's all right.

"I'm fine." She turns to her mother. "You aren't welcome here, Renee. I have a beautiful life, and a wonderful family that you will never be a part of."

"But ... but my cookies."

Realization hits Bella, and she laughs so hard she wakes Katherine.

"I'm the artist, and trust me when I say there isn't enough money in the world to get me to work for you."


	48. The Hunk 48

**48**

**The Hunk**

"You know. When I applied to work at The Bakery, I never thought I'd get a chance to flex all of my nerd muscles," Angela jokes as her fingers fly across the keyboard. "I figured I'd bake a few cookies and be the resident dish bitch."

"But look at you now." Bella laughs and points at something on the screen. "You spelled delicacies wrong."

"Oops, good eye. But yes, look at me now. Making my boss's wedding cake, designing a website for the store." She jerks her head toward Edward. "Tweaking recipes behind boss man's back."

Edward shuts the dishwasher and crosses his arms. "You think you're so sneaky, but I've noticed how much hazelnut extract you go through when you run the kitchen."

Bella waves him over and offers her seat up.

Before she can walk away, he pulls her onto his lap and slips his hand underneath the back of her shirt.

"Why do you think sales are through the roof when I'm in charge?" Angela tsks. "You rely on vanilla too much."

Edward scoffs. "I do not. I barely use that shit."

"Sure, sure."

"I don't!" he insists.

"All right, children. Simmer down now." Bella laughs. "Let's focus on why we're here, yeah?"

"Fine." Angela slides the computer to Edward. "Have a look."

"Wow."

Bella bounces on his knee as he navigates through the site. "We wanted it to be simple as far as designs go. Angela is a wizard."

Edward clicks on links and tabs while Angela boasts about her hobby in web design.

"It's perfect," he tells them. "But I wish you would choose a different picture for your cookie page. Maybe something more professional."

Bella pouts, and Angela laughs.

"It's my favorite, but Angela said the same thing. You guys win. Ang, go ahead and change it to the sunflower one we decided on."

"Thank you!" Angela points to the About Us icon. "This was Rose's idea. Since the bakery is family owned and operated, each employee will get their own page where we can update their menu recommendations or anecdotes. Take, for instance, the stories behind your vanilla-soaked recipes."

Ignoring her dig, Edward tells her that she's done an amazing job.

"I know. We're ready to go live, but first…" Angela pulls up Edward's profile, and he realizes that he and Bella will be sharing one.

The picture they chose is one of his favorites. Taken in the backyard before a few of the decorations succumbed to the elements. Bella was sad to see them go, so they set everything up for one last night and used a tripod to take their own, informal engagement photos.

Bella broke out his favorite dress for the occasion and looked absolutely breathtaking. But when doesn't she?

"So, what do you think?" Angela asks.

"I'm sorry, think about what?"

Bella points to the caption underneath the photo. "I want to forgo using my maiden name. I know the wedding isn't for a couple more weeks." She bites her lip. "After everything with my mom, I'd rather keep the Swan side of my life as discreet as possible."

"Sugar, there's no reason to hide any part of you, but I understand." He squeezes her hip. "I don't mind acknowledging that you're a Cullen in advance."

She leans down and kisses his cheek.

It's been five days since Renee Swan's unexpected visit, and they're in a good place. At least, they are now.

In a surprising turn of events, Edward wound up taking things harder than Bella to an extreme degree. He refused to let her out of his sight, barely letting her use the bathroom alone because he was afraid. Edward was scared that if he left her alone for too long that he'd find her fully clothed in the bottom of the bathtub or sitting alone in the dark, muffling her sobs with a pillow.

It took three days for Bella to put her foot down. She threatened to call Zafrina because he was being irrational, and that's when Edward finally broke down.

He couldn't watch her suffer. Not again. Not if he can help it.

They took an entire day off from work and wedding preparations to talk it out.

Bella assured him that she was okay and admitted that she was more pissed with her mother's behavior than anything. Because when Renee insinuated that Kat was Bella's, she didn't even acknowledge the fact that she could have a grandchild.

By the end of the night, it was decided that Edward would try to stop hovering so much, and Bella would try to be more understanding that his actions were out of love, in an effort to protect her.

Irina and Rose pop in while Angela is putting the final touches on the site to celebrate it going live.

But first …

"Hey, Ang." Edward taps her on the shoulder. "Do you think you can take a small break?"

"Yeah?"

Bella squeezes his hand, and Rose slides a folder across the table.

"On behalf of The Bakery, we would like to formally offer you a full-time position. In the kitchen."

Angela's eyes widen. "Really?"

Edward nods.

"We decided that we do need a resident dish bitch after all."

"Edward," Rosalie hisses.

"I'm sorry. This is a serious matter." He clears his throat. "You are an incredible asset to our family, and we'd be lost without you."

Tears pool in the girl's eyes and her smile widens. "Does this mean I can have input on some recipes?"

Everyone laughs.

"Actually," Bella pipes in. "We were talking, and I mentioned that you told me about how much you enjoy baking cupcakes. We don't sell those, and Irina agrees that there's profit to be made in adding a gourmet line to the menu."

Angela looks at Edward, and he nods.

"You'll be in charge of everything, and you can use as much hazelnut extract as you want."

Her mouth opens and shuts.

"Your salary and the details of your contract are all in there." Irina points to the folder. "We'll do a trial run on the gourmet line after the wedding, and if it all goes well—"

"Which it will," Rosalie adds.

"Which it will. You'll be adding that to the site as well."

"There's no pressure, Angela. If for some reason you and Ben decide this isn't something you're interested in—"

"Screw Ben. Yes. Fuck, yes. Where do I sign?"


	49. The Hermit 49

**49**

**The Hermit**

Perfect.

If Bella had to describe their wedding using only one word she would choose "perfect".

Starting the day before, when everyone they love is under one roof. Cullens, Swans, and Cheneys, as well as Irina and Jasper, crowd the house. Instead of feeling overwhelmed, Bella joins in on the excitement.

Hours full of laughter and preparations because they all have one goal in mind. That tomorrow will be perfect.

Perfect.

Their rehearsal dinner and dual bachelor and bachelorette party at their favorite diner and the ridiculous stares their group gets. Because who would choose a greasy spoon to celebrate their union? The same people who enjoyed dinner at the threshold of the home they now share.

Stories, some loving but most of them embarrassing, as two families and a few close friends prepare to become one.

Perfect.

The burning in her lungs as Edward kisses her goodnight before he heads to the hotel with his parents. The promise that tonight will be the last night she ever falls asleep without his arms around her. His words are sweet and oh so perfect.

Waking up the morning of and reaching out only to find the other side of the bed cold and empty.

The ache in her heart when she realizes that this is her final few hours as a Swan. The excitement that takes over when it hits her that finally, finally, she'll be officially a part of the family she's always wanted but never thought she deserved.

Until now.

And it's all because of him.

Perfect.

The small envelope that her sister hands her while she's curling her hair just the way he likes.

Her brand new name is written in her favorite handwriting. "_I'm counting down the seconds, Mrs. Cullen."_

A small watch pendant with instructions to add it to the necklace with the key charm he gave her for Christmas is a reminder because: "_No measure of time with you will be long enough, but let's start with forever."_

Perfect.

The butterflies hammer in her chest and stomach, making it impossible to take a deep breath or eat or drink anything as she steps into her wedding dress, and Alice bursts into tears.

"Bells, you look so beautiful. It's perfect."

Perfect.

The twelve steps it takes to walk up the petal-covered aisle, leading to the man who has changed her life so irrevocably. The smile on his face when he finally gets a look at the dress she worked so hard to keep a secret.

That warm feeling that flows through her when she realizes she could be wearing a flour sack, and he'd still look at her like that.

Perfect.

The moment of completion when he grows impatient and meets her halfway and takes her hand in his. "Sorry, Sugar. You were taking too long. I don't want to waste another minute without you by my side."

She sighs.

He's so perfect.

Happy tears that flow freely as they recite their handwritten vows. Eyes stinging because they don't want to miss a single second.

"I always considered the term 'love at first sight' something Hallmark or Nicholas Sparks invented." His voice catches, and she squeezes his fingers. "Until I met you, Sugar. You go on and on about how I've changed your life, but you don't even know just how full you made mine when you opened your door, and then your heart to me."

His hand trembles as he pushes the simple wedding band past her knuckles.

"I'll spend the rest of my days proving to you that you'll never regret that decision. This I vow to you."

The kiss he presses against the ring.

Perfect.

The tightness in her throat when it's her turn.

"I never thought I would have a life this wonderful until you blocked my peephole that day." They both laugh. "I know I didn't make it easy, but you never gave up on me. Not once. When I look into your eyes, it's impossible not to feel loved and safer than I ever have. It's impossible not to see our future—"

She stops mid-sentence to focus on not dropping the ring and waits until it's secure to continue.

"—every time you look at me. I will spend the rest of my days reassuring you that there isn't a single bit of me that doubts the strength of our love. This I vow to you."

Perfect.

The first time she's officially announced as Mrs. Edward Cullen, and the searing kiss her new husband plants on her eager mouth immediately afterward.

"I love you."

"I love you."

Perfect.

When he presents her to their friends and family, and she realizes just how big her circle of trust has gotten.

The mortifying moment Bella almost mows him down as they awkwardly share their first dance.

The broken champagne flute her new sister-in-law shatters when she tries to propose a toast in their honor.

The baby spit-up down the back of her wedding dress because one too many people snuck Kat a bite of their cake before she got her hands on her.

She wouldn't change a thing about it because it's all perfect in its own way.

As guests disperse, Edward leads her up the stairs to their bedroom, whispering promises that she knows he'll keep because when hasn't he?

"When you're ready, we'll go on a real honeymoon. Somewhere tropical and sandy."

She stops in front of him, staring into those green eyes with the laugh lines and crinkles in the corners. "Honey, this is more than enough for me."

Their first argument as a married couple is ridiculous but still doesn't change her opinion on the day.

When he finally relents, she lets him pull her soiled dress over her head.

"Fine. It'll be an amazing much-needed vacation then."

Bella smiles and asks him to make love to her.

And he does.

For hours.

Until her muscles are weak, and she can't catch her breath.

Until their mouths are sore, and their bodies are covered in sweat.

When they finally settle for the night, wrapped tightly around one another, the last words ring clear and true.

"Today was perfect."


	50. The End

**this is the end my friends. thank you for following this journey **

**50**

**The Hunk**

**Epilogue**

**Three Years Later**

He has one eye on his wife and the other on the clock hanging on the wall by the office door. As soon as the little hand hits twelve, he tosses a pan in the sink and stomps over to her workstation. With one finger, he plucks the ear bud out of her ear, making her jump and clutch her chest.

"Honey! You scared me."

Instead of apologizing, he takes the bag of icing out of her hand and sets it in a bowl. "It's noon. Time for lunch."

She rolls her pretty brown eyes. "I'm sure it can wait five minutes. That's plenty of time for me to finish these last few cookies."

"No." He shakes his head.

"No? Honey …"

"You promised, Sugar. Don't make me call Dr. Banner."

Bella huffs and pushes past him, roughly brushing up against his shoulder as she waddles to the office. "He said to take it easy, not that I needed to be tied to a chair for twenty hours a day."

"He also said to stay off your feet. We've been here since five, and you haven't taken a break in hours."

Bella sighs and plops down in a chair.

Edward is quick to grab a step stool and gestures for her to put her feet up.

"Edward—"

"Sugar, we aren't fighting over this. Put your feet up and take an hour to rest or we're going home, and you can kiss your half shifts goodbye." He isn't happy until her slightly swollen feet are elevated, and she's munching away at the sandwich he brought for her.

"Are you just going to stand there and watch me? Because you're starting to give me a complex."

He sits across from her and reaches for a bowl of fruit.

"I will not apologize for being worried about your health and wellbeing."

Bella sniffs. "You act like I'm not perfectly capable of listening to my body, Edward." She sighs. "I'm not asking you to apologize. I just need you to back off, just a little."

"I will."

Bella groans. "Sure, sure."

They eat in silence until the door swings open and a flustered Angela comes bustling in.

"Sorry I'm late, y'all. The babysitter was running behind, and Benji was being a dramatic fool. It took me an hour to get him to calm his tits."

"It's fine, Ang," Bella insists. "Edward and I are just having lunch, and then we'll be wrapping up for the day."

A grin spreads across his face at these words. He's had to drag her out the back door every night these days.

"Okay, I'll get to it then. Enjoy."

The door shuts, and Bella holds up her hand. "I don't want to hear it."

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"Tea party, Uncle Ed?"

Nearly four years old and Edward still can't find it in his heart to tell his niece no.

"Okay, Kit-kat."

They settle down at the coffee table with a plate of finger sandwiches and a plastic tea set. Edward watches her doctor up her "tea" with far too many sugar cubes and very little water—her special recipe.

"I'm pretty," Kat states, matter-of-factly, as she sloppily pours him a cup.

"You are very pretty."

"I know."

She pops a sugar cube in her mouth and chews on it loudly while she thinks.

"Babies will be pretty?"

Edward nods, and her smile turns into a scowl.

"No."

He sighs and offers her a sandwich, but she crosses her arms.

"No."

This argument is nothing new.

It's a touchy subject that Kat tries to bring up at least twice a day since she realized that she won't be the baby of the family anymore.

"Other people can be pretty too, remember?" Edward asks.

Kat just grunts and crunches on another sugar cube.

"Isn't Mommy pretty?"

Her pretty blue-green eyes roll. "Duh."

"And what about Momma?"

"Momma is berry pretty," she insists.

"She sure is. And Auntie Bella is pretty."

Kat takes a sip of her tea, pinky up, and then wipes her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Auntie Bewwa is fat."

Laughter floats down the stairs, and Rosalie comes swooping into the room, glaring at her only born. She takes Kat's chin in her hand and leans down until they're nose to nose. "All right mini monster. We've talked about this. Auntie Bella is pregnant, not fat."

"She is fat!" Kat argues. "And her is lazy."

Edward snorts.

"Katherine Marie Denali."

Everyone winces at Irina's firm tone. No one plays a better bad cop than Irina.

"Sorry, Momma." Kat sighs.

"No, ma'am. You need to tell Auntie Bella sorry."

"Oh, stop it, Ri. She's just a kid." Bella laughs and appears at the top of the stairs. "She's right. I am lazy."

"See." Kat cries.

"Sugar …" Edward hedges.

"Honey, Dr. Banner told me to take it easy. I'm not even on partial bed rest." She pulls at the hem of her too tight shirt. "Come help me downstairs so I can attend the tea party that Kitty-Kat was nice enough to invite me to."

"Tea party." Kat squeals and gets to work setting up enough cups and saucers for everyone.

Edward helps his heavily pregnant wife get down the stairs safely and doesn't stop fretting until she's resting in her favorite spot on the couch with her feet propped up.

"You're starting to swell more," he mutters and pushes at the puffy skin on her ankle.

"It's fine, Honey."

Kat happily plies everyone with sugar water and soggy sandwiches, making sure that pinkies are up and shoulders are straight.

"Mmm. This PB&J is to die for, Kitty-kat." Bella hums. "Very delicious."

"I know."

"The babies are really happy right now. Do you want to feel?"

Kat bites her lip. Despite feeling threatened by their impending arrival, she's very curious about her cousins.

"Come on, Kitty," Bella coos. "Tomorrow is their birthday, and you won't be able to feel them swimming around in my belly anymore."

They watch her face light up with excitement as the babies kick and punch against her hands.

"Cake?"

Bella nods.

"When we get home from the hospital, we'll have cake. I promise," she explains. "You get to help Auntie Angela decorate it, remember?"

"Yeah."

When Kat finally goes down for a nap, cuddled into her Aunt Bella's side, the adults spring into action.

While Bella tries to relax and get one last good rest in before all the excitement begins, Irina and Rosalie are meal prepping for the weeks to follow, and Edward packs and repacks the hospital bag.

He's sure he's forgetting something but wants everything to be perfect. Finally, after two years of struggling, the hormone shots and blood tests, their dreams are coming true. When the fertility specialist warned them that if successful, the first round of IVF could result in multiples, both Bella and Edward were open to the possibilities and agreed to implant all four viable embryos.

They prepared for four and were gifted two.

And they can't be more excited to start this new chapter of their lives.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"You're a dad!" Bella cries when the nurse plops their second child onto her chest.

Edward's no pro, but he fights the urge to ask the medical professionals to be a little gentler with his children.

His children.

He has two babies.

"You're a mom."

He presses a kiss on her trembling lips and looks down at the wailing babes as the nurses work to get them clean and warmed up.

Two bright pink faces, scrunched in discomfort from all the bright lights and rough hands.

He chokes back tears and takes inventory.

They're perfect. All fingers and toes, pouty lips, and button noses.

After all the heartbreak and struggle, and then the anxiety and fear, they're here.

Finally.

Edward chokes back a sob. "Sugar, you did it."

She lifts a shaky hand and caresses his face. "We did it. We're a family."

"We've always been a family, Sugar," he insists. "Faith and Hope just make it bigger and better."

"So much better." She sobs.

**o.O. .o.O.o**

"How's she doing?" Alice asks softly as Esme fawns over her new grandbabies.

Bella's laughing at something Carlisle said, and her smile is as genuine as can be.

"Fantastic," Edward answers honestly. "She's coping better than we could have ever dreamed."

A lot has happened over the past year. Business is thriving, and word of mouth has gotten them far. Alice and Jasper finally got married, and Irina and Rosalie jumped on the bandwagon shortly after. Angela gave birth to her first child, and Irina officially adopted Kat.

Bella and Edward sold their townhouse and bought the Pepto Bismol pink house around the corner so they'd have room for their expanding family. They made changes to make it their own. It's gray now.

The door, solid oak, has a wide pane of glass rather than a peephole because the years have taught Bella that she has no reason to hide away.

Her life is full and wonderful and worth sharing.


End file.
